Defining Moments
by Out-of-Reality
Summary: Buffy meets Conner before he's born and while she's dead where they become close.Then they both have to go back to the real world where only Buffy remembers their encounters.It was only her until Conner catches a glimpse of Buffy when the slayer turns up
1. Death Is Your Gift

**_SUMMARY _-** _Buffy meets Conner before he's born and while she's dead. They teach each other stuff and become close. Then they both have to go back to the real world where only Buffy remembers their encounters. Well it was only her until Conner catches a glimpse of Buffy in the real world when the slayer turns up in L.A. after Angel get's out of the water coffin. Drama, emotions, anger and BUFFY/ANGEL-NESS_

**_A/N -_** _The idea is kind of tacky and awkward but i like it. I love reviews! crave them and I'll worship you if you review. This starts as soon as Buffy dies at the end of the gift. Also only the first few chapters are in heaven._

_**SPOILERS -** The Gift, There's No Place Like Plrts Glrb, all of season 6 in Buffy and a lot of season 3 and 4 in Angel_

_**DISCLAIMER -** None of it's mine but the idea. All hail creator Joss! Transcripts also come from and  
_

**_- Defining Moments - By Out Of Reality_**

**-On The Tower-**

Buffy and her sister stood on top of the tower deciding how to say goodbye or what to do about the portal. Suddenly buffy remembered all these things about her and Dawn being the same person and a look of peace over-took her face.

She turns back to Dawn, who stares wide-eyed knowing what her sister is thinking, "Buffy ... no!"

Buffy tried to make her understand, "Dawnie, I have to.

Dawn still protested, "NO!"

Buffy ignored it and held Dawn by the upper arms, "Listen to me. Please there's not a lot of time, listen." Buffy continues to talk to her as the lightning also continues to crackle behind them. During her words Dawn started to cry, " I love you. I will ALWAYS love you but this is the work that I have to do. Tell Giles... tell giles I figured it out and...and I'm okay. And give my love to my friends. You have to take care of them now, you have to take care of each other. You have to be strong. Dawn the hardest thing in this world is to live in it. Be brave. Live. For Me."

Buffy stroked the side of her sister's face, gave her a kiss on the cheek and finally turned away from Dawn. She started to run down the platform with determination and clarity written in her eyes while Dawn was left to stand there crying, already mourning for her sister. When buffy reached the end of the platform she swan-dived off the edge and into the glowing white portal. Buffy fell into the portal and froze in the middle of the ball of energy motionless, making expressions of pain. Slowly Buffy started to calm down and the pain she had felt before was comfronted and no longer there. The portal itself slowly started to shrink and eventually it became nothing and dissappeared just in time for the sun to rise. The body of Buffy Summers was left to fall hard onto the ground below.

Willow and Tara who are holding each other up walk forward along with Giles, all three of them staring at the body in disbelief. Xander who was carrying Anya was the last to make it to the scene of Buffy's body lying amongst the rocks and debris. Spike was the only witness to Buffy's fall and yet he was still trying to move forward toward her body but failing and falling to the ground as the sunlight hit him. Willow's eyes never left Buffy's as she began to cry finally accepting the fact Buffy was no more. Tara was more in the midst of comforting her girlfriend and trying to find out how to deal with the sorrow she was also feeling. Xander still can't believe what he's seeing as a few tears managesd to escape his eyes.

Anya as always was confused and actually saddened with the fact Buffy is gone as she lowered her head to Xander's shoulder. Giles was probably hurt most of all. His daughter and his slayer lay lifeless so it was so surprise that he begand to cry. Spike sat in the spot he fell and covered his bloody face with his equally bloodied hands as he too began to sob for the loss of the slayer. Dawn also slowly made it to the bottom of the stairs and proved herself to be the most frantic. She ran to her sisters side and gripped her hand as her tears started up once more. Her friends and her family were left to mourn and deal with the death of Buffy Summers.

**-White Marble Chamber-**

Buffy's body lay sprawled out on the floor of the very bright chamber the same way it was on earth. Two figures stood above her staring into the slayer's closed eyes until they suddenly weren't closed anymore. As her eyes snapped open she lay still staring at the cieling, "Is this heaven?"

The female figure smiled, "You can say that."

Buffy still didn't stand, "I remember... I fell..."

The male figure nodded, "You did and you are dead. It's time to begin your after life."

Buffy finally processed what was going on and slowly stood up. When she was standing she looked into the eyes of the woman, "What does that mean?"

The male answered for the woman, "Your duties are not done slayer. They may be on earth but there is still much to accomplish."

Buffy couldn't believe it, "Even in death I have duties. I can't believe this."

The woman smiled, "These duties are nothing like the ones of who you used to be."

Buffy was suddenly intrigued, "So what do I have to do?"

The man answered again, "You will have a guide for a few days. He will show you what we need you to do."

Buffy nodded, "Who is it?"

No words were spoken and a uncomfortable silence took over the room. When Buffy was about to speak a door from the side of the room opened and Whistler walked through. He smiled at the slayer, "Long time no see."

Buffy sighed, "Please tell me you're not still annoying."

He didn't get a chance to answer because the woman looked at Whistler, "You will teach her and tell her everything Whistler. Do not fail us."

Whistler nodded and bowed to her before walking to buffy and grabbing her hand, "Come on."

Buffy looked instantly confused again, "Where are we going?"

The man spoke up to Buffy, "You need to trust him Buffy."

Buffy nodded and started walking in the direction Whistler wanted to. In seconds it was obvious where they were going, through the door that Whistler came in through. When they were through the door Buffy looked behind her once at the man and woman before the door closed. Buffy wasn't sure it was time for questions so she just admired the beauty around her because everywhere she looked it was pure white with the exception of different colored flower petals that would fall every few minutes. They were on a walkway that Buffy was scared of because there was only a faint gold lining that told you where the walkway began and ended. For all she knew she could have been walking on a bridge over a giant hole into nothing but she didn't want to find out so she stuck close to whistler and stayed quiet. Well she stayed quiet until they came to the end of the walkway. When they stopped Buffy noticed three doors and three golden outlines and sudenly she knew a choice was involved. There was also a small table in front of door number two which is where Whistler lead her to sit down.

As she sat she knew she couldn't stay quiet anymore, "What are you?"

Whistler laughed, "That's always the first question." Buffy glared and he answered in a very dramatic way, "Messenger for the powers that be." Buffy continued to glare with her clueless eyes so he continued but he was actually serious now, "The powers that be are like the good version of the 'devil.' They know everything and up until you they knew the future."

"What do you mean, up until me?"

Whistler smiled, "You changed the world Buffy Summers. I said it before and I'll say it again, no one saw you coming. Everything you've done, everything you've accomplished has been a surprise. This world was supossed to go to hell with Acathla but you surprised us yet again."

Buffy smiled despite the mention to Acathla until she realized how confused she still was, "How come I've never heard about the powers that be before?"

Whistler shrugged, "You never needed us. Angel on the other hand did."

"What?"

"Well, when Angel left Sunnydale he was pretty lost so we sent him someone like me only he was alive."

Buffy knew who he was talking about instantly, "Doyle. The guy that had the vision of me in Sunnydale."

Whistler nodded, "Yeah. Well the powers that be are the ones who create those visions. If you're alive you get visions, if you're not then you're like me."

Buffy processed his words, "What does that have to do with Angel?"

"I showed Angel how important it was for him to get a soul and Doyle showed him how important it was to be a part of this world. Now he has friends and co-workers."

Buffy nodded, "So, am I one of you now?"

Whistler smiled, "Actually no. Have you ever seen the show Charmed?" Buffy nodded. "Well you know how they have a whitelighter?" She could only nod again. "I need you to be a whitelighter for someone."

Buffy glared at him in complete disbelief, "You want me to stay dead and guide some witch on a good path?"

"No." Buffy was instantly clueless again. Whistler pointed to the three doors, "Each one of these doors leads you to a place where you will be happy. The first door is a door to the un-born, the second door leads you to as you call it, heaven and the third door will lead you to a room where you learn to be like me. We need you to walk through the first door and guide a boy we know is going to be a great asset with your help or a great dissappointment without your help."

"You want me to talk to a boy who isn't even born yet?" Whistler nods. "He's not going to remember it though."

"He will. He won't remember you or this place but he'll remember the feelings and the most impacting words. The only time he will fully remember you is if he sees you which is imposisble because when he's born you'll still be dead."

Buffy nodded, "So why me? Out of all the dead heroes in the world, why would you want me to pal around with this kid?"

Whistler started to look a little uncomfrtable, "Well, I figured you would hold most cause to keep him safe."

Buffy sighed, "He's another key isn't he?"

"He's Angel's son."

Buffy was stunned to silence. The confusion and pain was evident in buffy's eyes. Only one word was able to come out of her mouth, "What?"

Whistler hurried to explain, "It is true vampires can't have children but Angel and William are exceptions."

Buffy's head shot up, "Spike get's to have a kid too?"

"Yes, but not for a long time coming. Right now we're talking about Angel's kid."

Buffy nodded, "Why can he have kids?"

"He can't have kids Buffy, he can have a kid. This child you're going to meet is the one and only for Angel. To be honest there is no reason why. Angel's son is meant to be great and the real world is going to benefit from him turning out right."

Buffy finally asked the question that would make or break her heart right then, "Who's the mother?"

Whistler avoided her eyes, "I can't tell you. It's not that I don't want to tell you because I do, it's just I can't because I don't know."

"How do you not know?"

"I only know what the powers tell me and they didn't tell me that Buffy, I'm sorry. Would whoever the mother is really have an impact on your decision?"

"What do you mean decision?"

Whistler stood up, "Well you get to decide Buffy. Meeting Angel's son before he's born is through door number one. Going to heaven is door number two and being a messenger through door number 3. We need you to help us with his son but we've taken enough from you in your entire life so we're not going to take away your choice."

Buffy nodded and thought about it, "How are all the places different?"

Whistler smiled, "Doors one and three are like limbo. You're not finished dying yet but door number two means you're finished. You've lived your life and it meant something. Door three means giving up your friends, family and everything in the world yet still existing in it. Door number one isn't usually open to people but since we need you it's open to you."

Buffy stared at her twitching fingers while she thought about it, "If I help you will I be able to see the world? My friends? My family?"

Whistler sighed, "Your mom chose to be done like most people do, she went through door two. You'll be able to see her if you choose to do the same but if you walk through door one you'll be able to watch your living friends, you'll know they're okay."

The mention of her mom almost made the decision for her but knowing she could make a difference at all with Angel's son made her re-think it. Buffy shed a few tears before she stood up and stood next to Whistler staring at the doors, "Can you tell my mom I love her and that I'm so sorry." Whistler nodded and Buffy sniffled once more before clearing her throat, "Then what are we waiting for?"

Whistler smiled and grabbed Buffy's hand. In small steps they slowly made it to the front of door one. Whistler smiled, "You have to open it."

Buffy nodded and wrapped her hand around the knob. She closed her eyes and thought about why she was doing this before finally twisting the knob. The door opened a bright light enveloped them.


	2. Teacher

**-After Life-**

When the bright light cleared Buffy and Doyle stood in the middle of an open field. The grass was tall and the sun was shining bright which is what brought up buffy's next question, "Is it ever dark here?"

Whistler smiled and started walking, "When you're in your own quarters you can have whatever you want."

That brought up even more questions for Buffy as she ran to catch up with Whistler, "So where do I live? Do I sleep? Does the boy live with me? What's the boys name? Do I eat?"

Whistler only smiled and finally stopped when they got to the top of a hill. He pointed to a little cottage ahead of them, "That's where you stay. You can sleep, eat or do whatever. It's like you're alive in a place full of people who haven't even been born yet. I think the boys name will be a good conversation opener."

Buffy nodded, "So, you said I could see my friends and family. How do I do that?"

Whistler motioned towards the house again, "You've got a T.V. You say the name of the station you want to watch and it will go there. You say the name of the person you want to see it will show you them at that moment. Be careful because sometimes they're in the shower."

Buffy nodded and smiled before finally looking Whistler in the eyes, "So, where is he?"

Whistler did a 180 and soon they were staring at another hilltop that contained a large tree and a boy sitting under it. Whistler watched Buffy watch the boy, "He doesn't know about Angel buffy but it's okay if you tell him. We don't know anything about his future except the father and impact on the world."

Buffy looked confused again, "So then how do you know he needs guidance?"

Whistler shrugged, "I just know what they tell me. I figure you just make nice and maybe you'll both learn something."

Buffy nodded as she continued to watch the boy from far away, "How come he looks 16? Wouldn't he be a child at least?"

Whistler smiled, "They always appear the age that they're most remembered at. He must make quite a difference at age 16."

Buffy took a deep breath, "I think we can go over now, I'm ready."

Whistler shook his head, "No. You've got to do this alone. Plus I have a message to deliver to one Joyce Summers."

Buffy smiled and nodded, "Thanks Whistler. Not just for my mom but for the fact that you're not as cryptic as you were the first time."

Whistler smiled and started walking backwards, "You're welcome. Oh and slayer..." buffy turned towards him, "...You're making a difference."

Buffy nodded and watched him walk away until he was out of sight before starting her journey down her hilltop and up the boys. It took her a little longer then she thought but eventually she made it up his hill and smiled at the beauty of the tree. The kid didn't make any notice to her existence, not until Buffy walked right up to him.

She stood beside him and crossed her arms, staring at the open fields, "It's really pretty isn't it?"

The boy looked up from whatever he was doing and nodded, "You're new aren't you?"

Buffy nodded and looked down, for the first time meeting his eyes. The only thought that crossed her mind was of how much this boy looked like his dad. She came back to reality and smiled, "This tree taken?" The boy shook his head and Buffy sat down. They stayed quiet until Buffy knew she was going to have to be the conversationalist, "How come you're alone?"

The boy shrugged, "I'm not much for crowds."

Buffy smiled, "Me niether." For the first time the boy half smiled before going back to whatever he was doing. "What are you doing?"

He lifted the folder in front of him so buffy could see which revealed a picture of a handrawn girls with her hair blowing in the wind. Buffy smiled, "I guess you saw us on the other hill."

The boy nodded, "I hope you don't mind."

Buffy shook her head, "Of course not. I think it's a very good version of me."

The kid smiled and or the first time asked a question, "What were you doing with Whistler? Did you choose to be reborn again?"

Buffy shook her head and made the quick decision that there was no harm in telling the boy the truth, "Actually he needed a favor from me and I like doing favors."

The boy nodded, "Is it important?" Buffy nodded. "I'm going to be important some day, I hope."

Buffy smiled, "You're going to be important, I promise."

The boy laughed a little, "I've known you a few seconds and we're not going to know each other for much longer so what makes you think I'm going to believe this promise?"

Buffy took a deep breath, "I know your dad Conner and when you're born I know you're going to be the most important thing in the world."

Conner's head shot up to meet Buffy's, "What? How do you know my dad? How do you know anything about the world?"

Buffy smiled, "I was living but then I died. Whistler told me that they needed me and I agreed to help. I don't know what I'm supossed to be doing really but they think you're too important to be left alone."

"I'm just you're assignment?"

Buffy shook her head and smiled, "Oh no. You are my choice. I could of moved on and spent my after life with my mom but I knew that you're going to make a difference and I wanted to be a part of that."

The boy looked confused, "How do you know?"

Buffy smiled, "I know because you have part of your dad in you. You only have to meet him for a few seconds to mean something to the world."

The boy actually smiled, "How do you know my dad?"

Buffy looked accross the open field, "He's the love of my life."

"Please tell me you're not my mom because you being dead would make that really difficult."

"No, I'm not you're mom and I don't know who is. I've been in love with your dad though since I was 16. There was a lot of restrictions on us being together so he left me because he thought it would be better for me and now he's all happy somewhere in L.A."

"Where's L.A?"

Buffy laughed, "I keep forgetting you've never seen the world before."

The boy looked back to his drawing, "I can't wait though." He looked back up at buffy, "What's the world like?"

Buffy shrugged and tried to find the perfect answer, "It's a scary place full of possibilities. I think you'll fit right in."

The boy smiled and went back to his drawing until curiousity took over, "Do I look like my dad?"

Buffy nodded instantly, "Oh yeah! Splitting image. He's an artist too actually."

The was actually happy, "That's so amazing."

Buffy was already attached to this kid and she only knew him for a few minutes. She watched him draw for a little while before finally speaking again, "Do you know your name already or do you have to wait?"

The boy lifted his head and stared into Buffy's eyes, "I'm Conner."

Buffy smiled, "I'm Buffy."

Conner giggled a bit, "I think I like that name."

Buffy nodded, "I get that a lot, or I used to."

Conner suddenly got serious, "What's it like to die?" Then in a few seconds all the thoughts of leavig her friends and family came flooding back to her. The sadness started to show in her eyes which made Conner shake his head, "Oh I'm sorry Buffy. I didn't mean to..."

Buffy interrupted him, "Don't worry about it Conner. It's just I haven't really had time to process the fact I won't be able to talk to them again and stuff like that."

Conner was interested now, "What's the point in being born if you die?"

Buffy thought about it for a few seconds, "Living. After you're born and you learn to talk and walk stuff starts to happen to you. All these feelings swarm you and a lot of them are good. Just being alive to feel them is the most amazing thing in the world."

Conner smiled, "What's your favorite feeling?"

It took Buffy a few second to answer him, "Love."

Conner looked confused, "What is that? You said you felt it for my father."

Buffy thought about how to explain the feeling and it took her a few minutes to get the words right, "Love is when you look someone in the eyes and know instantly that you can't live without them in this world."

Conner still looked confused, "Then my dad must die soon. I mean if you're gone and he can't live without you..."

Buffy stopped him before he got ahead of himself, "I meant you feel like you can't live without them. Your dad is too important to this world to leave it now and he knows it."

Conner felt a sudden jolt of pride for his dad who he hadn't even met, "He must be cool."

Buffy nodded, "Oh yeah."

"Do you miss him?"

"I do, a whole lot."

Conner slowly moved to wrap his hand in Buffy's, "If I remember this I'll tell him you said hi."

Buffy let a tear fall and gripped Conner's hand tighter, "Thanks."

He smiled, "Do you miss everyone else? All these other friends?"

"I do. Whistler said I could see them any time I wanted in my house but they can wait."

Conner shook his head, "You should see your friends."

Buffy nodded and suddenly thought of something, "Why don't you come with me?"

Conner thought about it for a few seconds before nodding, "That would be nice."

"Do you have to check in anywhere? Somebody's house or something?"

Conner stood and smiled, "You should really learn about your assignments before you take them. There's like really big houses in the main part of the city and everyone being born soon stays there. They don't count or anything. I mean it's not like you can die here."

Buffy nodded, "Good, then let's go."

At that moment Conner used his hand that was wrapped in buffy's to pull her to a standing position. She smiled and looked surprised. Conner bent down to pick up his drawing stuff, "Why are you so surprised?"

Buffy shrugged, "I'm usually the stronger person when I meet someone."

"Really?"

Buffy grabbed his hand again, "I'll explain when we get back to my place." Conner nodded and followed in buffy's lead to the cottage Whistler pointed out earlier


	3. Preview

**-Cottage-**

Buffy opened the door and smiled at the obvious coziness of the place. Conner did the same thing as he followed buffy into the main room. He put his stuff down on and empty tabe and then followed buffy for the exploration of the place. They explored every room together before finally making it back to the main room.

Buffy flew herself down on the couch, "God it's beautiful."

Conner stayed standing, "Yeah it is."

Buffy smiled, "You can sit down you know."

After an awkward smile Conner made his way to sit down next to buffy on the couch in front of the T.V. There was a small silence that made Conner squirm so he cleared his throat, "Don't you want to see your friends?"

Buffy nodded, "You don't mind?"

Conner actually smiled, "I'd like to know what the world is like."

Buffy pondered it and nodded before looking at the T.V. "Okay." After a few seconds she looked dissappointed, "I don't know how to work it."

Conner shrugged, "I've never even seen a T.V."

Buffy didn't have time to look surprised because she was more annoyed, "It's not like I can just say, I want to see Willow and it will..."

Conner smiled as the T.V turned on and the image of Willow alone curled up on a couch appeared, holding a few white envelopes. He didn't know who the girl was so he examined her, "Buffy, why are her eyes all red?" When the boy turned to look Buffy in the eyes he noticed her eyes were a little watery, "Are you okay Buffy?"

Buffy remembered Conner was there too and she stopped herself from crying, "Oh, I'm fine. Her eyes are red because when people are sad they cry sometimes. Some people think when guys cry it's a girly thing to do but when you're born make sure you remember that crying is a good thing, you don't ever need to hide it."

Conner nodded and turned back to Willow just in time for her to sniffle, "What is sad Buffy?"

Buffy tried to decide how to explain that now, "In that world sometimes things and people dissappoint you or they go wrong. Being sad is that feeling when you know something has gone wrong. Willow and my other friends are sad because I wasn't supossed to die."

"Does everyone die?"

Buffy nodded, "Eventually. When you're born and you're little you think nothing in the world can go wrong and it's the most wonderful feeling in the whole world, don't ever loose that but the truth is things do go wrong, people make mistakes. You just have to learn from them, be better."

Conner thought about it for a while as he stared at Willow, "Is she going to be okay?"

Buffy nodded, "They're all so strong. She'll be fine soon."

Conner stared at buffy for a few seconds trying to word his thoughts, "It must be so hard for them without you. I just met you and I don't want you to leave."

Buffy felt loved instantly because she felt the exact same way about this little boy, "Conner, I'm not going to leave. I'm dead." She giggled a bit before getting serious and continuing, "Until the day you're born I'm going to be here. You're lucky I never get tired of those questions though."

Conner laughed a little too and stared back at the T.V. His eyes grew wider though as Xander, Anya, Giles, and Tara walked in carrying beverages. Buffy's eyes perked up too but she soon got annoyed when she could only see Willow. "I want to see them all."

The instant her words were spoken the T.V. screen showed the whole entire living room. Conner was too intrigued with everything he didn't even answer her. It was like reality T.V.

**-The Real World-**

Dawn was on the couch curled into the corner, still wearing the dress yet her cuts were cleaned up. It surprised her that Spike sat beside her containing the same far off look in his eyes Dawn had. Giles walked in and sat in the middle of them handing a cup of blood to Spike which he took but did not drink. Xander walked to hand Dawn a cup of tea before moving to sit on chair. Anya walked right behind Xander so that when he sat she could curl up on his lap. Tara handed Willow a cup of tea before sitting on floor and gripping her lovers hand.

The silence was killing them so when Willow finally spoke everyone jumped, "I found these envelopes on the table. Our names are written in her handwriting."

Her voice made everyone jump but it got their attention. Willow handed Tara hers and everyone elses. Tara leaned over to Xander's chair and handed him, Anya's and his envelopes. Xander passed them to Dawn who took hers and passed it to Giles. Spike was extremely surprised that there was a envelope left for him. Suddenly a silence took over the room as everyone opened their letters and read them. Each letter started with the line I kind of figured I might not live to see today and it always peeved me off when I never got to say goodbye to people who leave me so you know I had to.

Willow's letter conatined words of devotion and mentioned how she tried her best. Buffy also mentioned how good it was that Willow had tara back and how amazing their years spent together were. Tara's letter surprised her because it talked about how they weren't close but how Buffy wished they were closer. The slayer talked about how much Willow needs her now and about how much Tara actually means to the group.

Xander's mentioned a few recent memories, it mentioned how much she was going to miss him, it mentioned how much she valued his heart and the last line was "I maybe the world's hero Xander but you were always my hero." Anya opened hers and found a few lines mentioning her quirkiness and love for life that buffy valued and how if Anya didn't take care of Xander she'd haunt her forever. Dawn's was pretty much a repeat of what buffy said on the tower and Giles' was about how he was her real dad, he was more then a watcher and about how much she worshiped everything he had taught her.

Spike's letter was a little different from the others. There was no declaration of love or talk about how much she was going to miss this world, there was only truth. His letter read like this;

_Dear Spike,_

_I don't hate you. I don't think I could ever let myself love you but I don't hate you and that's a start. I know you're probably thinking about where you're going to take off now but I need you to keep your promise, I need you to take care of Dawn, take care of my friends. Our friendship consisted of violent quirks and actions but that's just our way. We both know I'd save you in an instant if you were in trouble. I don't know why I'm so used to showing my affection like that. I don't know what happens when i die but if I can i hope I can haunt you for a while. There is something else I need you to do for me. I need you to go to L.A. You can bring everyone else but Angel needs to hear it from you. His letter is in your envelope and I hope you find the courage to go to him. I guess I'll see you at my funeral...oh and Spike, I'll miss you..._

_Love your friend Buffy Summers_

Sniffles and sobs surrounded the living room as everyone finished their letters with the exception for Spike. He was done crying, he sudenly knew Buffy wouldn't want it. He waited a few minutes for everyone to calm down before addressing them all, "We have to go to L.A."

Dawn's eyes opened wide, "Oh god, Angel."

Spike nodded, "I don't know if you guys want to come but I have to go and I want to leave as soon as possible."

Xander cleared his throat, "I'm going."

Anya nodded, "Me too."

Willow looked SPike in the eyes, "I guess we're all going."

Giles stood up and avoided everyones glances, "I won't be joining you. I would think someone has to make the funeral arrangements."

Spike nodded, "Then be packed and ready to go in a couple of hours. The sooner we go the sooner we can leave."

He didn't wait for answers as he stood and walked out of the room. Dawn sniffled a little, "I'm going to L.A. too."

Willow looked at Giles after nodding, "Are you sure you want to do this?"

Giles looked at the ground, "I feel I have to."

Anya and Xander stood up. Xander looked at Willow, "We should get ready then."

**-Cottage - After life-**

Buffy shook her head, "I don't want to see anymore."

The T.V. suddenly went blank and Conner jumped a little in fear, "What's wrong Buffy?"

Buffy looked at Conner with teary eyes, "I just can't watch them in pain, not anymore."

Conner gripped her hand like he saw Tara do to Willow. "How come you can't go back?"

"There are some things in that world you can't change Conner, some things aren't supossed to change and messing with death is one of them. Even if you have magic or other powers you never mess with death."

Conner was suddenly confused again, "People have magic powers?"

Buffy nodded and suddenly realized this is where the talk about demons and darkness comes in. She was going to have to tell him and yet she couldn't find the words.


	4. Special Emotions

**-Cottage - After Life-**

Buffy was still completely silent as she debated on how to tell Conner about the supernatural. As he stared at buffy, Conner started to look a little worried, "Buffy?"

Buffy took a deep breath, "Well Conner...When people are born they're born into a world where almost everybody is the same. They grow up learning that there are no monsters under the bed and that magic is only a gimick but you and me, we're special. You're going to be born into a world that exists with the normal one. It's going to be scary a lot of the time because what you see will frighten you but you have to remember that your dad is never going to let anything happen to you."

Conner still looked confused, "What makes our world special?"

Buffy pondered her answer before speaking, "Well, I don't know if you know what vampires are yet but they exist. In a short explanation monsters are real and they are very dangerous. There are people though who are destined to save the world from those monsters and that's me and your dad. I used to be the slayer, the one girl who had the abilities to fight these vampires but then I died and now it's up to your dad and my friends that you saw earlier."

"Does my dad have your strengths too?"

This was the hardest part of the explanation for Buffy, "Well, your dad is actually a vampire." Before Conner went insane Buffy hurried to calm him down, "Don't worry Conner, you're not evil. See you dad is a vampire but he has a soul. There are only two vampires in that world you are not aloud to harm and that's Angel, your dad and Spike. Usually vampires aren't aloud to have children but you're different. The second you go into that world Conner, you're going to be a miracle. No matter what anybody says or does around you I want you to know that."

Conner looked curious now, "Why would someone say I'm not a miracle?"

Buffy smiled, "Angel has this thing where it's really hard for him to express his feelings at all and I just need you to remember that when you grow up and he's brooding in a room that it's not your fault. Plus watching him brood all the time is worth hearing him speak when he finally does."

"How come he doesn't talk a lot?"

Buffy shrugged, "I don't know. Sometimes I think it's because he's always thinking but I never really asked. My friend Xander always used to tell me that I shouldn't trust him because people who hide that much have a reason to lie but when he talks you know you can trust him. He get's this look in his eyes and you know for sure that he's telling you the truth." She really stared at Conner now as she spoke, "You know, you have the same eyes?"

Conner looked down and if he could he would of blushed. "I guess, thanks."

Buffy smiled, "Your welcome."

Conner smiled and leaned in on Buffy's shoulder. They just sat in a nice silence together for a while until another thought popped into his head, "Am I going to be able to fight these monsters too?"

Buffy nodded, "Oh yeah Conner, Whistler said you were meant to do great things and I believe him."

He lfted his head to stare into her eyes, "Do you want to train me?"

Despite Buffy's better judgement she was flattered and smiled, "We'll see tomorrow."

Conner smiled but then something started ot bug him, "Did Whistler say why he wanted you to guide me?"

Buffy shook her head, "He was really cryptic about it but I think he just wanted me to guide you, like give you advice about living in the world."

Conner thought about her answer, "So what's your most important advice?"

It took Buffy a few minutes to decide what she wanted to say but when she found it she smiled, "No matter what happens or what people say to you always remember that it's okay to ask for help and there's always going to be people around you that you can talk to. Even though I'm dead you can always talk to me and especially your dad. He may not be so open or good at dealing with children but you can go to him for anything."

"I hope I remember that."

Buffy lifted her hand and ruffled his hair, "I hope you remember too." They stayed just sitting there in that position for the longest time until Buffy realized his eyes starting to close. She smiled, "Come on Conner, I think you need to sleep."

Conner sat up, "I don't want to go back."

Buffy stood upa nd grabbed his hand, "You don't have to. I think I saw more then one bed."

Conner nodded and let Buffy guide him towards a bedroom. He lay down and Buffy tucked him in. Conner looked Buffy in the eyes, "I am going to remember you right?"

Buffy didn't honestly know the answer but she smiled anyway, "You better." After a short quiet moment she walked back to the doorway, "Sleep Conner, I'll be on the couch for a little while longer."

He nodded and shit his eyes. Buffy walked back to the couch and sat down after wrapping a balnket around her. She stared at the T.V. and took a deep breath before closing her eyes and speaking, "I want to see Angel and everyone with him."

**-Entering The Hyperion - Garden-**

Angel, Wesley, Gunn, Lorne, Cordy, and Fred and the guys are making their way through the garden and into the Hyperion. Fred was amazed already, "Are-are you sure about that?"

Cordy went into reassurance mode, "Trust me. Tacos everywhere - and - soap!"

Gunn turned into guy mode, "Yo, that portal jumping is a fun ride. We sell it to a theme park we could get paid!"

Angel pushes himself to the front of the group so he could get to the door leading itnot he hotel, "Okay. Can I say it? I wanna say it."

"Say what?"

Angel pushes the double doors open and walks into the lobby along with everyone else. "There's no place like.."

He trails off as the sight of Spike, Willow, Xander, Anya and Dawn caught his eye. Angel's smile vanished as his eyes matched with the blonde vampire, "Spike?"

Cordelia was right there with him, "What the hell are all of you doing here and with Spike?"

Spike got off his chair and stood eye to eye with Angel. The intensity of the moment could errupt a volcano but Angel finally broke the silence, "It's Buffy."

Spike nodded, "Something happened and... you and me need to talk."

Angel shook his head and looked at Willow, "Where is she?"

Xander spoke for Willow, "Talk with Spike Angel. We'll explain to your friends."

Angel went back to glaring at Spike before worry got the best of him, "Let's go." Spike nodded and followed Angel toward and Office leaving the Sunnydale gang to explain buffy's death to the L.A. gang.

**-Office-**

Angel practically slammed the door as he followed Spike into the office. Spike sat down in the chair just in time for Angel to start yelling, "What the hell did you do?"

Spike shook his head, "It wasn't me this time Angel. Something bad happened and Buffy wanted me to tell you."

Angel was more worried then mad now, "What happened Spike?"

Spike took a deep breath knowing this would be the first time he said these words out loud, "There was a fight between Buffy and a god and in the end Buffy beet her but... Dawn's blood opened a portal that could only be closed with Summer's blood and Buffy sacrificed herself. It killed her Angel."

Angel stood there frozen still trying to process every word Spike said. When the words 'killed her' started running through his head over and over his body fell back and soon the only thing holding him up was the wall. He was trying everything in himself not to cry or show his vulnerability but Spike could see it instantly.

Spike stood up and walked to the door. He patted Angel's shoulder and tried not to cry himself, "I'll be out there."

He was about to walk out when Angel started to speak, "I should of been there. I should of stayed after her mom died like she told me to."

**-After life - Cottage-**

Buffy sat in tears and now crouched in front of the T.V. with her hand against the screen. "Oh no Angel, don't blame yourself, please don't."

**-Hyperion - Office-**

Spike thought about what to say as his eyes dropped to the floor, "Believe me Angel, being there doesn't make a difference."

"You know I promised her once, that I would always take care of her, that no matter what I would be there."

Spike nodded, "You weren't the only one to break a promise." He reached into the pocket of his coat and took out a piece of paper with Angel's name on it, "Plus, she knew she was going to die. Here's your goodbye."

Angel grabbed the paper quickly and unfolded it. Spike patted him on the shoulder again before really walking out the door this time. The second he was gone a few tears fell from Angel's eyes as his body slowly slid down the wall to a crouching position. His letter was the most emotional, obviously. It read;

_Dear Angel,_

_I guess getting this letter will come as a big shock to you because well it means I'm not there anymore. I should of told you at my mom's funeral that things were bad but I couldn't bring myself to say anything. Now I know you're going to find some reason or some way that you think this is your fault but I need you to know it's not. The choice I made was mine and I think I'm going to be okay. I just couldn't leave without telling you one more time how much I really do love you. I missed you so much but I understand now that world was just not ready for you and me. I'll be waiting Angel, I'll wait all eternity, I promise._

_Always your girl Buffy Summers_

At that moment Angel couldn't control his emotions anymore and burst into tears.

**-After Life - Cottage-**

Buffy was pretty much broken now as she watched with intense eyes the sight before her. She took a deep breath and knew she couldn't watch anymore, "I don't want to see anything."

The T.V shut off and Buffy was left to mourn the fact she would never see her friends and her Angel ever again. It took her quite a long time to make it back to the couch but when she did her tears calmed down and now she was down to sniffles and a few whimpers. She was about to fall asleep until the door flew open. Instantly Buffy was on her feet and in fighting stance. She sat back down again when she realized it was only Whistler.

Whistler noticed her current state but knew not to mention it so he made different conversation, "You know you don't always have to be on alert here. Violence doesn't even exist."

Buffy nodded, "That's a change."

Whistler walked to the couch and sat down, "So, how's Conner doing?"

Buffy half smiled, "He seems to be really interested in what happens in the world. I told him about demons existing and stuff. I even told him his dad was a vampire."

Whistler nodded, "Good. Now it will seem farmiliar to him when he's born."

"He even asked me to train him. You think I should do it?"

Whistler thought about it, "Defenitely. A boy in the world with slayer moves. As long as he is on our side that should be amazing."

"He might not be on our side?"

Whistler shrugged, "There is a possibility but there was also one with you. Every slayer is born with the fact she could go good or evil. Conner is just a male you."

"So we can do anything?" Wistler nodded, "What if I want to read or something? How do I get a book?"

Whistler stood up and walked to the back of the room where there was a mirror on top of a dresser. "Ask the mirror if you can have some thing and whatever it is will appear. Don't think about asking for money because you don't need that here."

Buffy stood up and followed him towards the dresser, "Okay then, I think I'm okay."

Whistler looked her over and smiled knowing she could use some good news, "Your mother says she understands." Buffy smiled back at him, "She says to do what you have to."

"I think I have to do this."

"Good." He walked back to the couch and threw himself on it, "I'll be crashing here to keep an eye on you two."

Buffy wrapped her blanket around her again, "Okay, I'll be in my room."

When Buffy was out of sight Whistler put his hat on his head, "Sleep slayer, tomorrows a long day."

_**A/N -** So that was the majority of the emotional chapters anyway. The rest is way better, believe me this is my favorite story of the ones I wrote._


	5. Angel

**-Afterlife - Cottage - Morning-**

Buffy awoke to the sounds of laughing in another one of the many rooms. She wrapped herself in a blanket and followed the noises. She came to a stop when she walked into what appeared to be the kitchen and saw Conner and Whistler trying to make pancakes. Whistler had just flipped a pancake and failed to catch it with the pan. When buffy also laughed it got the attention of both of them. Whistler dropped the pan and whioch only caused Conner and Buffy to laugh more.

Buffy calmed down and stared at Whistler, "Not one of your finer moments."

Whistler mocked her and then explained, "Conner here has never eaten anything ever and I figured a big breakfast would be nice. Could use a woman's touch though."

Buffy nodded and walked towards them, "I suposse I could cook for three."

When Buffy wrapped an apron around her Conner and Whistler sat down. Conner watched every move Buffy made with admiration, "Did you sleep well?"

"Oh yeah, better then I have in a long time."

Whistler added his two cents, "Well, they don't call it eternal rest for nothing."

Buffy smiled and continued her cooking. Whistler looked at Conner, "So, what are your plans today?"

Conner looked a little too happy, "Buffy said she might train me." Conner turned to face Buffy, "Can we do that today?"

Buffy turned to face Whistler who smiled and then winked at Conner, "After a good breakfast of course."

Conner was defenitely happy with the answer. He looked at Whistler, "I saw Buffy's friends last night."

Whistler stared at Buffy as he replied to Conner, "Really? Did you see your dad?"

Conner shook his head, "No. I yawned and Buffy said I was tired."

Whistler smiled and turned back towards Conner, "Well, then..."

Buffy Spoke to Whistler as she continued to focus herself on cooking, "What are you doing today?"

Whistler smiled, "I have hero messenger stuff to do."

His sentence suddenly triggered something in buffy's head. She turned towards Conner and smiled, "Does Whistler know you draw?" He shook his head but before he could actually answer Buffy starting speaking again, "Maybe you should go get your sketchbook and show Whistler."

Whistler nodded to Conner and he walked off in the direction of the living room. Buffy stared at Whistler, "You can go back to my world right?" He nodded, "I want you to go talk to Angel."

Whistler instantly started shaking his head and waving his hands, "No, no, no. I am not aloud to..."

"You did it before. You're the one who guided him the first time."

"Yes, but that was when he was off track. He's not off track right now."

Buffy tried to make him understand, "He will be. Look when we lost each other the first time it took Doyle to bring him back to reality. Now think about what's going to happen to him when I'm dead. I may sound a little self-centered but I know him and..."

Whistler sighed, "We'll let it go for a few days and then we'll check up on his lifestyle."

Buffy smiled, "Thank you."

Whistler nodded, "Now cook my food."

Buffy stuck out her tongue and then went back to cooking. Whistler then suddenly realized something else, "One more thing, you can't let the kid look at his dad. I forgot to tell you yesterday but everyone he sees from that life will trigger his memory of this place."

Buffy nodded and flipped the pancake, "Well then, the lesson of too much T.V. will be learned ridiculously early."

Whistler smiled and Conner walked back in. He threw the sketches on the table and Whistler opened the cover, "Now let's take a look into the world of Conner."

**-The Real World - Hyperion - Morning-**

Everyone with the exception of Angel sat around the table. Every eye red and with bags making it obvious that none of them had slept too well. Cordelia took a sip of her coffee, "When do you think he's going to come down?"

Spike sighed, "When Buffy comes back."

Willow looked confused, "What about her funeral?"

Spike shook his head, "You're having it in the day because that girl spent too much time in the dark. Angel and me are going to have to have our own little funeral." Suddenly a silence took them over and everyone had to refrain from crying again.

**-Angel's Room-**

Angel lay in the same position he was in when he lay down in the first place. His eyes red and puffy, his clothes wrinkled and his body stiff. His mind was in a place of Buffy filled memories and dreams that never left him and never will.

**-After Life - Field - Couple Hours Later-**

Buffy and Conner were walking along the field they first met in. Whistler had left after the amazingly big breakfast and then Conner and Buffy went for their little walk. Most of their talk was about the real world and what it was going to be like. From far away it looked like thos two had known each other all of Buffy's life. They even played a little tag and wresstled around in the tall grass. Right now they lay breathing hard in a clearing staring up at the sky.

Buffy grabbed Conner's hand, "You ever wonder why we breath when we don't exist?"

Conner shook his head, "I didn't wonder about much until you came into my life."

Buffy shook her finger at him, "Tsk, tsk tsk. Being curious is the best gift you have. The more curious you are the more knowledge you'll end up with."

Conner nodded and looked around, "Can we start the training stuff now?"

Buffy nodded and hopped to a standing position, "Of course."

In seconds Buffy was describing moves, blocks and simple offensives. Conner was defenitely more then eager to learn and Buffy knew instantly that Conner really would be great the second he was born.

**-After Life - Midnight-**

Conner was in bed an hour ago and Whistler was on his way. Buffy sat curled up on the couch again debating on watching her old life. She was abaout to say Angel's name she wasn't ready to hate herself for causing him so much pain. She took a deep breath and walked to her room. She lay on her back, stared at the cieling and got ready to dream and remember everything about her old life.

**-After Life - Week Later - Afternoon-**

Conner and Buffy were in the middle of training in the big field when Whistler walked up to them. He distracted Buffy which allowed Conner to kick her in the stomach. He was instantly apologetic but Buffy was smiling, "At least we know you will be able to handle yourself."

Whistler didn't look too happy though as Conner smiled back at his slayer. Buffy on the other hand went serious when she noticed Whistler's look. She turned towards Conner, "Why don't you go get us some water, please."

Conner nodded and kissed Buffy on the cheek before taking off at a rapid pace towards the cottage. Whistler watched him, "You two are really getting close."

Buffy nodded, "Yeah. Now tell me why you're really standing there staring at me."

Whistler sighed, "Let's just say, you were right about Angel. Time is exactly the same up here as down there so it's been like eight or nine days since you died and the only reason he has left his room is to go to your funeral. The only person he's spoken to is Spike."

Buffy shook her head and put her hand to her forehead, "Umm, you need to go talk to him then. I know people grieve but..."

Whistler cut her off and grabbed her shoulders, "I know Buffy, we see it in his future. I'm going to make the trip as soon as sun sets. Figured you should know."

Buffy took a deep breath, "Yeah, so... Re-assure him a lot that I'm okay and don't tell him about Conner, not yet. Tell him he can take some time off but there's something bigger out there then me, Tell him I say hi and..."

Whistler actually smiled, "You know slayer, I've been doing this for a lot longer then you have. I know what I'm doing."

Buffy slowly nodded, "Thanks for telling me. I'll be sure to watch at sunset then."

Whistler nodded and noticed Conner coming back, "You've got your hands full for now though. I have a few more things to do."

Buffy smiled, "Alright, thanks Whistler."

Whistler turned towards Conner, "Have fun kid."

Conner waved and Whistler started to walk off. When Conner reached Buffy he handed her a bottle of water, "Why was he so serious?"

Buffy tried to act natural, "Just some world stuff that isn't so cool. No need to worry Conner."

He took a big sip of his water and smiled, "So, back to training?"

Buffy nodded and had some of her water. She put the lid back on and threw the bottle to the ground, "Let's fight."


	6. Reassurance

_**A/N -** If you haven't watched Saved By the Bell then you should because Zach is well the cutest sometimes and screech will make you laugh. Oh god the drama and emotion. Nothing like Buffy AT ALL but still teen drama!_

**-After Life - Sunset-**

Buffy and Conner were just finishing dinner when buffy noticed the time. She hadn't exactly figured out what to tell Conner but she took a deep breath, "Hey Conner, do you think I could spend some alone time tonight."

Conner looked confused, "You don't want to hang out with me tonight?"

Buffy shook her head, "Of course I do, it's just... I think I need a few hours alone with the T.V. I haven't really said my goodbyes or let them go or..."

Conner understood instantly, "Of course I can leave you alone. I'll be in my room."

Right before Conner left the room Buffy admired the close resembelence between him and Angel. "Thanks Conner."

He smiled and nodded before taking off towards him room. When he was out of sight Buffy was on her feet instantly and running for the living room.

**-Living Room-**

Buffy curled up on the couch and wrapped herself in a blanket already set for the fact tonight was going to be emotional. she stared at the T.V and took a deep breath, "I want to see Angel's Room."

**-Real world - Hyperion - Angel's Room-**

Angel lay in his bed in the exact position we had seen him in before. He stared up at the cieling like he was looking at something, like he knew he would find his answers there but no such thing happened. The letter Buffy had written him was lying next to him already worn and damp from a few tears. Angel was so in tune with his own thoughts that he couldn't hear any noise that went on around him. That's probably why When Whistler opened his door and lent on the doorframe Angel didn't budge. Whistler watched Angel's motionless body for a few minutes before finally making himself known.

He walked right up to the bed and sighed, "She's not in the cieling Angel."

Angel's head snapped to the side and was looking Whistler in the eyes. After the surprise settled in about Whistler even being there Angel lay back down on his pillow, "What are you doing here?"

Whistler shrugged, "Take a look around you Angel. Your friends, Spike, and Xander are worried about you, the demon count in L.A. is way up and you haven't gotten up from this bed more then once a day." Angel stayed silent so Whistler took a different approach, "You know when I found you in the alley the first time I showed you the slayer and I gave you a reason."

"So, what did you think would happen when the reason was no longer here?"

"She may not be walking, talking or slaying anymore but she's still here Angel. She's doing more good up there then she ever did down here." Angel was suddenly interested as Whistler started walking around the room, "She's doing fine Angel. She says hey."

Angel sat up as fast as possible, "You talk to her?"

Whistler nodded, "Look Angel, I can't tell you everything about what's going on up there but I can tell you that the slayer's worried about you. We're all kind of worried about you."

Angel shrugged, "You know, I started this whole redemption thing because I knew I could help her, because she would be better for it. When I left her I thought it would be better for her but I was wrong. I should of stayed, I should of been there. Continuing this whole fight for all mankind thing feels like I'm betraying her somehow."

Whistler shook his head, "Oh please Angel, That woman loves you more then she ever loved anything and even in death she can't stop. She needs you and the world needs you to keep fighting. Protecting the world she gave her life to save isn't betraying her, it's honoring her."

"You know, nothing ever mattered, not like she did."

Whistler nodded, "She can still matter Angel, she's always going to matter but you have got to remember that there's other people that matter, there's a whole world that matters."

Angel nodded, "I can't... I can't be a hero right now."

Whistler agreed, "Well then don't...take a vacation but remember that no matter what you do, you can't hide from the truth. Buffy is gone but the rest of your friends need you." Angel's silence brought a smile to Whistler's face, "No rush Angel, that girls addictive."

Whistler was about to leave and got to the door until Angel spoke, "You tell her I love her, I'll always love her." The messenger nodded before taking off out the door.

**-After Life - Cottage - Living Room-**

Buffy had tears streaming down her face as she whispered to herself, "She knows Angel, she knows." Buffy continued to stare at the T.V. because Angel's eyes were full of confidence and sincerity again instead of sadness and despair. The slayer took a deep breath, "I think it's finally time for us to let go." She shed a few more tears before finally closing her eyes, "I don't want to see anything."

As the screen went black Buffy slowly opened her yes. It was time to accept the fact that she was dead and watching her friends this often was never going to let her let them go. She still had goodbyes to say though so she wiped her eyes and tried to smile, "I want to see the magic box."

**-Real World - Magic Box-**

The gang sat around the main table in silence. Lately, all it has been is silence. Even Spike whose mouth was always open sat on a desk in his own corner quietly. Xander was the first to speak since buffy started watching, "Look guys, I know it's hard to talk about but we have to find a way to keep buffy's death a permanant secret. Sooner or later some demon is going to walk on by and notice there's no great female protector."

Willow nodded but Giles spoke up, "Faith?"

Xander shook his head, "She's in jail and please god let's hope she stays there."

Tara looked around kind of nervous, "We could umm... I know this sounds a little morbid but... What about the Buffybot?"

Spike's ears perked up and he started shaking his head, "NO! No, no, no!"

Xander agreed instantly, "There's no way, I mean...it's kind of addicted to Spike."

Spike nodded, "Exactly and personally the last thing I need is a reminder of the fact that the slayer isn't here anymore."

Dawn nodded instantly, "If we bring the bot back then we're going to see Buffy all the time, how am I supossed to let go if I look into her eyes every single day?"

Willow actually defended Tara's idea, "I know it's going to be hard but maybe if I do a little re-wiring it won't want Spike anymore and we'll only use her for patrolling."

Xander shook his head, "How can you actually be considering this?"

Willow stood up and hit the table, "Buffy is gone Xander. We all said our goodbyes and now we need to face the truth. The real Buffy isn't coming back and sadly Spike isn't enough to keep this town safe because the second the demon plane finds out the slayer is gone they'll desemate the town. I miss her, so much but we have to accept the facts and deal with her not being here anymore."

Giles nodded and despite his obvious pain he agreed. He patted the sniffling Willow's shoulder and addressed everyone else, "I think she's right. The bot may be our only answer. I suggest we all take the night to accept the fact the bot is going to be taking over and to hopefully let Buffy go."

Tara stood up also, "We actually have to move in with Dawn tonight."

Dawn looked over to Spike who had been pretty quiet, "You're moving in too, right?"

Spike nodded slowly, "I'll crash there a few nights a week, make sure you're getting off to school and stuff."

Dawn stood up, "I don't want to see the bot as much as possible. It's not right."

Willow looked over to Xander, "It's the best way Xander."

Xander shrugged and stood up, "Whatever you say Willow. If you can live with it so can I." He turned towards Anya, "We should go home, I have to go back to work tomorrow."

Anya followed Xander out the door while Dawn looked at Willow, "I'm ready to go."

Willow nodded and then turned towards Giles, "You going to be okay?"

Giles nodded, sat down and took off his glasses, "I will be. You should get Dawn home, it's late. We'll talk about the bot tomorrow."

Spike stood up and walked to the door, "I'll walk the girls home."

After a few sympathetic hugs the magic box was empty with the exception of an obviously distraught Giles at the table. He sighed and whispered to himself while playing with his glasses, "Well Buffy, we always knew the day would come where you weren't going to be here and I hope wherever you are that you're happy and that you can hear me. I loved you like a daughter and I always will, goodbye!" Then in a swift movement Giles was on his feet and out the door in a matter of seconds.

**-After Life - Cottage - Living Room-**

Buffy sat a little teary in the exact same place staring at the empty magic box. She took a deep breath, "Goodbye." It took her another few seconds to speak again, "I don't want to see anything."

After staring at the blank T.V. for a few more minutes she decided to go find Conner. It wasn't too late and this after life place was always beautiful in the night. She walked up to Conner's already open door and stopped to admire him through the open door. She suddenly realized that there would come a day soon that we wasn't going to be there anymore. She was faced with a decision to either cut him off from her life or get to know him as much as possible before the day came and he was gone. He smiled at whatever he was drawing and suddeny the answer was simple. Buffy couldn't imagine not knowing everything about this boy before he was gone.

She smiled and walked into the room, "What are you drawing?"

He stared up at her, "Why were you watching me?"

Buffy looked a little surprised, "You knew?" He nodded. "Then why didn't you say anything?"

Conner shrugged and continued to draw, "You looked like you needed to think. So, why were you watching me?"

Buffy walked over to the bed and sat down before explaining, "It was just occurring to me that come another few months you aren't going to be here anymore. Now I thought me and you had gotten pretty close these past few days and it caught me off guard."

Conner smiled and looked up at her again, "At least we still have time."

Buffy nodded, "Thank god. Now come for a walk with me. I'm not tired and I'm bored."

Conner put his sketchbook down and hopped off the bed. He offered Buffy his hand which she took as she stood up. He guided her out his bedroom door and then out the cottage one. Both were extremely happy for the fact that tonight was going to be the first of many for them.

**-Next morning-**

Buffy and Conner had fallen asleep watching old episodes of Saved By the Bell together on the couch. Buffy was curled into Conner's shoulder while Conner sat leaning into the corner of the couch. This was the sight Whistler walked in on and smiled. He shut the door and was about to walk into his room when Buffy cleared her throat and sat up. She noticed Whistler and followed him into his room.

When they got out of Conner's hearing range she hugged him, "Thanks."

When they let go Whistler smiled, "Don't worry about it."

Buffy nodded, "I don't know what I'd do without you."

Whistler threw his hat and coat on the bed before turning towards buffy again, "You're going to have to start." Buffy was suddenly caught off guard and stayed quiet until Whistler explained, "I'm only around for a few more days and then the boys all yours."

You could see the fear in Buffy's eyes, "Are you kidding? I don't know what to do. I don't know what happens when he's born. I don't know what I can and can't show or tell him."

Whistler then threw himself on the bed, "You've been doing fine and you're going to keep doing fine. You're going to walk out of this room and back to Conner. You're going to look at him and know that you can do it. You have never not gotten it done."

Buffy nodded, "Just say bye before you take off."

Whistler just nodded before buffy walked back to her sleeping position with Conner. Whistler was right because Buffy stared Conner in the eyes and knew instantly this responsibility was one of the better ones.


	7. Change

_**A/N -** A lot of the parts from here on out are going to come from transcripts with a few changes. So if I don't write it or change it then things happend just like they did in the show._

**-After Life - Two Months And A Week Later-**

When you look at Conner and Buffy now you'd think mother and son, you'd wonder how Conner would of ever gone through this process without her. Almost every moment of every day was spent with each other. Buffy hadn't checked on her friends since she had said goodbye yet she knew somewhere in her soul that everyone was okay. Right now Buffy and Conner were laying on the ground of the open field breathing hard. They had just finished one of their training sessions.

Buffy grabbed his hand and sat up, "You're getting amazing."

Conner smiled back at her, "I learned from the best."

**-Real World - Forest - Night-**

Tara, Willow, Xander, and Anya are standing in a semicircle beside Buffy's grave. Willow is directly at the foot of the grave while Xander and Tara are on opposite sides of the grave holding lit candles.

Willow looked around, "Does everybody have their candles?"

Anya sounded a little nervous, "I'm trying, my lighter won't stay lit."

Willow rushed her as Anya continued to flicker the lighter rapidly, "Well, hurry, it has to-"

Tara agreed, "What time is it?"

Xander looks at his watch, "A minute until midnight."

Willow was still worried about Anya, "C'mon, Anya, do you have it?"

Anya finally got her lighter lit and then lit her candle, "I got it, I got it. I got it."

Willow finally calmed a little, "Okay. Start the circle. Now." They all kneel, holding their candles, except Willow who holds the Urn of Osiris. Willow produces a small jar containing the fawn's blood, and pours it into the urn. Tara and Xander look nervous as Willow starts to chant, "Osiris, keeper of the gate, master of all fate, hear us." She dips her finger into the urn and marks her forehead and both cheeks with the blood. "Before time, and after. Before knowing and nothing." She pours the contents of the urn onto the earth. "Accept our offering. Know our prayer."

Suddenly she jerks backward, panting, and her arms go out at her sides. Deep ugly gashes appear on her arms and Xander reaches for her, "WILLOW!"

Tara stuttered but stopped him, "No! She t - she told me ... she'd be tested. This is supposed to happen."

Willow chanted louder, "Osiris! Here lies the warrior of the people. Let her cross over."

Willow winces in pain. We see blood running from the cuts on her arms, and round shapes moving under her skin. She gives a little moan of pain. The round things move up her arms and over her chest toward her neck. Xander was still worried, "She needs help!"

Tara agreed but defended Willow, "Xander, she's strong! She said not to stop, no matter what. If we break the cycle now, it's over."

They all watch anxiously. Willow continued to breath heavily. Suddenly they hear a loud rumbling and they all look around nervously. "Oh god, what is that noise?"

On the main Street Sunnydale people scream in fear as the demons on motorcycles roar through the downtown area. The rumbling noise from motorcycle engines continue as the demons drive over cars, through curbside restaurant tables and between pedestrians. At least one demon grabs a woman and pulls her onto his bike. We see them throwing garbage cans through windows, hitting cars with baseball bats, etc. A demon lights a Molotov cocktail and throws it through a store window. Pedestrians continue screaming and running away. Back at the grave Willow is still kneeling with her arms held out, panting. The others watch with concern.

Willow on the other hand is still chanting but now she's even yelling, "Osiris, let her cross over! Aah..."

Willow makes choking noises as we see the round things under her skin moving up her neck. Now even Tara was worried, "Oh my god, oh my god."

**-After Life - Field - Same Time as Real World-**

Conner and Buffy were still in the field but Buffy suddenly started to cough. Conner looked worried and started rubbing her back, "Hey, hey, you're okay?"

Buffy smiled and spoke when she could, "Oh, I'm fine."

Buffy calmed down and so did Conner. He still looked worried though, "I thought I was losing you."

Buffy rubbed his cheek and smiled, "Oh hunny, you're never going to lose me. Even when you leave I'll be with you. When you talk to yourself in the night you'll be talking to me. You can't get rid of me."

Conner hugged Buffy but then she started coughing again. When she stood up and gripped her stomach Conner started to get real worried, "What's going on Buffy?"

Buffy took a deep breath, "I just need some water sweetie."

Conner nodded and smiled right before he took off, "You'll be here when I get back?"

Buffy smiled, "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else." That satisfied Conner and he took off towards the cottage.

**-White Marble Chamber-**

Whistler stood before the oracles worried, "What's happening?"

The woman spoke in a very harsh tone, "The slayer is being brought back. Her friends believe it is best. Apparently her destiny has not been fulfilled."

Whistler shook his head, "What about the boy? This could ruin everything."

The man nodded, "You must go Whistler. Explain everything to him."

Whistler sighed and took off through the door yelling one thing, "God, I hate my job."

**-Real World - At The Grave-**

Willow leans forward putting her hands on the ground, gagging. A snake head appears in her open mouth. Her fingers clutch the grass showing obvious pain right before the rest of the snake slithers out of her mouth and onto the ground. The others are completely horrified while Tara anxiously repeats reassuring words, "It's a test. It's a test. Willow..."

Willow is still leaning over the ground with her mouth still open. Anya, Xander, and Tara continue to stare as an orange light swirls around Willow, who is kneeling up again, panting loudly. "Osiris, release her!"

Buffybot runs up behind Tara, "Willow! I need service!"

The bot looks behind her and runs off as the motorcycle demons ride up. The demons ride around the bot, trapping her. They also ride around the others. Anya yelps. Anya, Xander, and Tara get up and clutch each other, looking around at the demons. Willow is still encased in a tube of reddish-orange light, panting. The demons ride around and around.

Tara never takes her eyes off of her love, "Willow!"

One of the demons runs his bike over the Urn of Osiris, shattering it. Willow screams as loud as possible, "No!"

The light dissipates and Willow falls to the ground. Tara runs to comfort her but a mag rides in front of her, cutting her off. She screams and moves back. The mag is obviously pleased, "Look what I found!"

The demons continue riding circles around BuffyBot. Xander sees an opening and dashes forward, grabs Willow and pulls her out of the way just as Mag rides his bike through the spot where Willow was lying. Xander yells to the other two girls, "Take off! Go! Go!"

Tara and Anya run off. Xander lifts Willow by the shoulders and pulls/shoves her into the underbrush. Tara and Anya run through the forest together with Mag pursuing them. He grabs Anya as he rides by, pulls her onto his bike.

Tara stops running, "Dissolvo!"

A ball of blue light flashes from Tara to the motorcycle, knocking Anya free. She hits the ground and rolls as the motorcycle continues on. Tara runs to Anya, helps her up and they continue running. Xander was in a different part of the forest, carrying Willow. He stops, puts her down with her back against a tree. She begins to regain consciousness.

Xander notices and starts to make sure his best friend recovered okay, "Willow. Willow, are you okay?"

Willow was still weak, "Did it work?"

Xander shook his head knowing this would dissappoint her, "I'm sorry." Willow passes out again while Xander kneels there on the ground with her lying across his lap. He looks around nervously.

**-After Life-**

Buffy dropped to the ground and screamed as loud as she could obviously in pain. Conner dropped the water and started running back out to comfort her. Whistler was running as fast as he could towards the slayer also hearing her cry of pain. Buffy was gripping her stomach and whimpering.

As if she knew what was happening she closed her eyes, gripped the grass and started whispering to herself, "Please no, I'm not meant to go back, not yet. Please don't let them take me."

Her pleadings meant nothing as an orange-red light started to surround her. It got brighter and brighter and brighter to the point Buffy was blinded by it. She passed out and fell to the ground but by the time the light was gone Buffy was nowhere to be found. Conner and Whistler reached the place of Buffy's dissappearance at the same time. No words were spoken as Conner shook his head, dropped to his knees and started to cry. Whistler did the only humane thing and wrapped his arms around the boy for comfort knowing the explanation was going to be even harder.

**-Real World - Grave - Coffin-**

Buffy's wrinkled desiccated body encased in black clothing lay still until an orange mist from before swirls around the head, which is a skull with much of the skin rotting off and the hair decaying. As the mist moves around the body, the eyeballs reappear, the skin and hair repair themselves, and it resolves into Buffy, wide-eyed and gasping. Her soul had moved from a bright and calming place into her first glimpse of what could be hell. She looks around, panting, with an expression of extreme fear.

**-Somewhere in The Forest-**

Xander, Willow, Anya and Tara stand around trying to find a plan to escape the demons. Xander goes to Willow and starts to lift her up again, "New plan. Let's split up."

Anya was first to object, "No, bad plan."

Now Tara stood beside Willow holding up a side of her, "I'll take her."

Xander objected, "No, I can carry her." Tara looks anxious, "I'll keep her safe, I promise."

Tara nods reluctantly, "We should meet up somewhere."

Xander agreed, "The magic box. Whoever gets there first, call Dawn and Spike."

Tara and Anya start off, but Anya pauses. "Wait. What about the Buffybot?"

Xander has an indecisive moment, "We can't. It's lost." He fully lifts Willow like a baby, "Go!"

Xander and Willow head off first and then tara and Anya go off in another direction. Back at the grave the bot is on the ground and the demons surround her, kicking her and yelling happily. Inside the coffin Buffy pounds frantically on the sides, tries to scream but no sound comes out. She looks terrified. She continues to pound and bang on the inner lid just inches from her face as she also begins to rip away the cloth that covers the lid. She grunts with exertion as the cloth finally rips, even just a little bit.

In the forest Xander walks along carrying Willow, moving at a fast walk. He pauses, puts her down on the ground. Willow comes to again. He reminds her of everything that happened that night and it finally sunk into Willow's brain that Buffy was really gone, there's no bringing her back. Yet back in the coffin Buffy continued to rip the cloth from the coffin with all of her power. She bangs her head against the lid, even punches it and her fist goes through the wood. Dirt begins to rain down on her as she pulls at the wood, widening the hole. Anya and Tara's demons get bored and take off so they get their gettaway chance just in time. Spike and Dawn also make their escape chance as Spike steal a motorcycle and they take off down a street.

At Buffy's grave site the ground is already churned up from all the motorcycles riding over it so it made it a tiny bit easier for buffy to get out. It took a few minutes but suddenly a hand bursts out from below, then another hand, then Buffy's head and shoulders. Her first movement is a gasp for and then she pulls herself up onto the grass. She lies their panting and staring at her old world in fear and loathing. It took her a few minutes but she slowly got to her feet and then turned to stare at the headstone with her name on it. She frowned in confusion but then her eyes widen in shock as the memory hits her, the memory of how she died and of Conner.

**-Streets Of Sunnydale-**

It took her a while but Buffy finally made it to the downtown area. A car sits there still on fire, half burnt away. Buffy walks up and stares and then we see a street that's littered with debris. Buffy wears a black dress with dark hose and black heeled shoes. Her hair is shaggy and mostly covers her face. From Buffy's point of view everything is blurry and indistinct. As she continues to walk, her eyes squint and she never stops frowning at the burning cars and stores. She stops walking to stare at a car an a demon on his motorcycle roars past and throws something as he goes by. Buffy watches but then backs away obviously scared.

**-Magic Shop-**

Tara and Anya run into the shop obviously safe. They go down the steps into the main room.

Tara looks for their lovers, "Willow, Xander!" Tara goes to look in the back room, comes back. Anya looks around the store. Tara then states the obvious, "They're not here."

Anya sighs in relief, "Thank god." Tara stares at her confused and then Anya explains, "No, I mean, my store hasn't been looted."

They hear a loud banging noise from outside. They both turn to look and Tara finishes Anya's sentence, "Yet."

They run to the windows and after Anya finally panics Tara calms her down. She then comes up with a plan to find and guide Willow home. She runs to the round table, shoves all the stuff off of it and climbs up on it, sits cross-legged and puts her hands on her knees. She whispers a few words and Anya watches kind of confused but silent.

**-Forest-**

Willow and Xander were lost until Willow noticed a light in front of them. Xander was obviously freaked and even a little more as Willow told him it was Tara. Despite his hesitance he followed Willow and Tara's light.

**-Magic Box-**

They had all finally made it there with the exception of Spike and Dawn. They greeted each other and were now trying to decide what to do about the demon problem. Willow stood painfully on her feet and took charge, "Xander, grab the weapons. We're gonna look for Dawn and Spike."

They hear sounds of glass breaking and every head turned towards it. Tara brought reality back to the group, "If we're gonna go, we should go now, they're just getting more and more worked up by the moment."

Xander nodded but tried to calm them all down, "Well, they can't keep it up forever. I mean, maybe they'll party themselves out, you know, tire of this place and move on."

**-Streets-**

Razor adressed his minions and basically told them to hold up their hats and find a parking space because they were staying. Then they chained the bot to motorcycles just in time for the real Buffy to show up and watch. The four motorcycles all moved off in four different directions. Each bike was attached to one of the bot's limbs. Her arms and legs were ripped from her body and her torso went flying.

Buffy didn't think as she screamed, "NO!"

The demons nearest Buffy heard her scream and turned around and Buffy looked around anxiously. The demons near her moved aside so that all the demons could see her.

Razor stares at buffy and smiled evily, "Another one for the fire, boys." Buffy stared alarmed as he continued, "Tear it up."

Buffy backed away, turned and began to run. A demon on a motorcycle came from behind and cut in front of her. She turned to see another one coming at her, swinging a chain over his head. Buffy ran toward that demon as the first one followed. She ducked, and the chain hit the first demon, knocking him off his bike. Buffy got up and ran off.


	8. Pain and Resurrection

**_A/N -_** _The next few chapters are a l;ittle off the script but I'll get creative again soon!_

**-Another Street-**

They all carry weapons as the group of four walks in search of Spike and Dawn. Tara tried to make Willow see the reality and advantage to the spell not working.

On Buffy's street she lept over a pile of stuff and then flung herself over a fence. A motorcycle creeches to a stop behind her and the demon growls angrily.

Back with the scoobies Xander was trying to convince Anya that now was not the best time to tell everyone about their engagement. Anya could be very stubborn sometimes. She mentioned something about no more surprises and suddenly they all stop walking as something drops to the ground in front of them.

Xander doesn't see it but yells, "Watch it!"

It's Buffy. The slayer crouches there staring at them through her hair. She rises to her feet. Anya thinks it's just the bot, "It ... it's the Buffy Bot."

Xander goes along ith it, "Ah, peachy. No doubt to lead the wild bunch right to us again. Hey Will, next time this thing's damaged, couldn't ya program it to find the nearest Radio Shack, or..."

Xander cuts himself off when he sees the look on Willow's face as the witch stares at buffy in wonder, "Buffy?" Buffy stares fearfully, then turns and runs away. Willow yells after her, "Buffy!"

Xander catches on, "Buffy!"

The gang runs after her screaming her name hoping to get her attention. The scoobies go around a corner into another alley where they find buffy crouched into a corner. Willow tries to get her attention and then Xander But Buffy could only stare at them nervous and in fear.

Tara made the first real important observation though, "Her hands are bleeding. Her fingers."

They all finally realize Buffy's hands which are covered in her own blood. Xander started to shake his head in dismay, "Oh no. NO! How could we... so stupid!"

Willow thought he was talking about the spell, "XANDER!"

He explained though, "Our spell. Our resurrection spell worked like a magic charm. We brought you back to life, Buffy." He stares at Willow, "Right where we left her." He pauses, "In her coffin."

Tara couldn't believe it while she comforted her lover, "She had to... dig out of her own grave."

Buffy continued to crouch and avoid them out of fear. She stared at them through her blurry eyes and staticy hearing. Her friends tried to comfort her and reach her but nothing worked. It wasn't until Xander mentioned the word home that she stared one of them in the eye. Xander nodded and stared Buffy in the eyes telling her that she was really home. Unfortunately the moment was ruined by Razor who showed up. The scoobies tried to be intimidating but Razor wasn't buying any of it. Buffy slowly started to risebut it wasn't until after Razor hit Willow that buffy walked right up to him.

He hits her in the face. Her head whips to the side but she doesn't otherwise move. Razor looks a little uncertain. Slowly, she turns her head back to face him again. There's blood on her lip. Her face hardens into her famous "I'm gonna kick your ass" expression. Razor throws another punch but Buffy stops it, grabbing his fist and holding it immobile. With her other hand she punches him in the face twice, then she kicks him. He falls to the ground unconscious. The other demons look on nervously. Willow sits up, stares.

Buffy stood over Razor's motionless body looking confused. Xander and Anya stare. The other demons yell and attack Buffy. She kicks one of them back. Xander and Anya get up. Buffy blocks another demon's weapon and kicks him in the stomach. Another demon attacks Xander who blocks with his axe, then punches the demon. Buffy blocks a punch and punches the demon in the face, then punches another one. Willow loads her crossbow and fires, hitting a demon in the middle of the chest.

A demon attacks Buffy with a knife and she grabs his arm in both hands, pauses to kick another demon away behind her, swings the one with the knife around and throws him into another demon, shoves another one away, ducks and punches, ducks and punches again. Then Buffy is surrounded by demons hitting her with various weapons, and she huddles down on the ground under their blows. Suddenly she springs back up again, throwing them off her. She kicks one in the groin and he takes two more down with him. Another demon thrusts a baseball bat at Buffy and she grabs it, uses one end to hit a demon behind her, then uses the other end to hit the first demon.

**-Main Street-**

Spike and Dawn come to a stop at the site of the Buffybot destruction. They see the bot broken but Dawn walks over to the head which starts talking. It says something about the other Buffy and Dawn stands in shock staring at the lifeless robot. After afew seconds Dawn takes off without Spike noticing. The vampire was checking out the damage and it took him a while but he finally noticed Dawn wasn't there and then he hopped on the bike to look for her.

**-Alley-**

The demons were illedgedly dead as Tara sighed, "Well, they wanted a massacre."

Everyone stood in a row staring at Buffy. Xander was the first to speak, "She's Buffy. She's herself again." Buffy stares him in the eye again, "You're back, Buffy, you really are." Xander moves to hug her but but she takes a quick step back, looking fearful. "Whoa." He softened his voice even more, "Whoa."

Xander had spoken too soon as Buffy started to look around in anguish. She lifted her bloody hand to her mouth, wiped the blood from her lip and then looked at her hand. She looks about to cry and then started to walk forward. The others watch uncertainly. Buffy goes past Xander and breaks into a run, taking off around the corner. Willow calls after her and then they question her dissappearance but no one had the answers. They didn't have time to think about it because Razor came back to life. After a small fight tara finally stuck an axe in it's back and then they all took off to find Buffy.

**-Tower-**

Buffy stood on the tower remembering every free moment she felt the night she died. She was finished, she was finally at peace. Even in death with Conner she was at peace. That's what hurt the most, Conner. She had just finished telling him she wouldn't leave him and she couldn't even explain or say goodbye. The only thing she knew though was that when she jumped off that tower the first time her life changed for the better and all she wanted was to get that back. Dawn showed up though and for the first time Buffy turned around and spoke. She asked if this place was hell which Dawn couldn't believe. Buffy was ready to jump again right up until the point where the tower almost fell down.

Buffy runs across the platform to Dawn, pulls her up and into the body of the tower. They run around one bend, pause and look around. Buffy holds onto Dawn, leaps off the tower and grabs the rope. They hang there for a moment, then the rope begins to move and they plummet downward. Dawn screams. They fall for a while and then something catches and they stop. They both look toward the ground, still a long ways off. The bolt holding the pulley secure breaks off, and they fall the rest of the way, Dawn screaming the whole time.

They land on some cardboard on the ground where they lie gasping. Buffy looks up to see the platform break off the tower and fall toward them. Buffy grabs Dawn, they both get up and run off an instant before the platform falls on the cardboard. The entire tower crumbles and falls to the ground which makes a huge noise. Buffy and Dawn go around a corner and collapse on the ground panting.

Dawn winces in pain, looks up at Buffy's face while the noise dies away. "Buffy?" Buffy looks at her apprehensively. Dawn smiles in disbelief. "Buffy. You ... you ..." She reaches for Buffy's cheek, "...You're really here." She reaches to hug her big sister and starts to cry, "You're alive, and you're home. You're home." Buffy doesn't share any of the enthusiasm or joy as she sits still while Dawn enjoys the moment.

**-After Life-**

Whistler had got Conner back on the couch and finally calmed him down. Conner couldn't believe it, "She looked me in the eye and told me she was going to be there when I got back."

Whistler nodded, "She was supossed to be. No one up here planned on her leaving."

Conner started to get angry though, "Why did you let them take her back? You guys have power, I know you do. Why did you have to let them take her away from me?"

Whistler sighed, "I'm sorry kid, but you're blaming the wrong people. Her friends decided her life is not over down there."

Conner stood up still angry, "I want to remember this Whistler, I need to remember and I need to show them how much pain they just caused me."

Whistler shook his head, "Conner, this is the biggest lesson we needed Buffy to teach you. If you let your anger allow you to punish the guilty then your life will be ruined. You protect your loved ones but you never punish those who make those mistakes."

Conner sighed, "But they took her away from me. I need her to make it through this whole thing."

Whistler nodded, "I'm here Conner. You have to know though that she would be here if she could. She loved you so much more then you even know."

"Sure she did. She loves her friends."

"She does but Conner believe me, I'm not aloud to lie, Buffy loves you equally, she may love you even more. If you ever see her in that life though, you'll remember all of this. Everything, every moment. She remembers it all now and it's going to take so long for her to let you go."

Conner walked to the doorway, "I'm not even born yet and I know what pain feels like. I must really hate the world when I'm born."

Then he walked out. Whistler kicked the table and looked up into the cieling, "You shouldn't of let her go back. He needs her." After the silence he kept talking, "He's already falling. You may as well of signed the world over to the demons yourselves." Then he stomped out of the cottage.

**-White Marble Room-**

The woman stared at the man, "They'll both understand when he's born."

The man shrugged and walked a little buit away, "I don't know. Maybe we shouldn't of let her go back."

The woman smiled, "Conner will need her more in that world then he ever did here. You know that."

The man agreed, "I guess so. Their future is blurry. It's dependednt on one moment, one decision that slayer has to make. If he is to remember then she will have to make the decision to help."

The woman nodded, "You underestimate the slayer's love for the vampire and for Conner. She'll help, she was born to."


	9. I Was Happy

_**A/N -** Just for the record I hate the after life demon so he's not in my fic!_

**-Real World - Alleys-**

The group of four were still walking around everywhere but they had finally come to the conclusion that Buffy must of walked home. That was the only place they hadn't looked and that's where they were headed. They saw the demons leave town and then they brough tup the possibility of buffy being traumatized in some hell demension...little did they know...

**-Summer's House-**

Buffy walked towards the living room as Dawn shut the door. When they both got to the room Dawn turned on the light and Buffy winced in pain. Dawn watched anxiously as Buffy surveyed the living room, the dining room and the stairs. When both of the girls made their way upstairs Dawn got her clothes and now they stood in front of the bathroom mirror which Buffy was staring into like she was hoping to find something. Dawn motioned towards Buffy's unbuttoned shirt after cleaning her face a little and then for the first time noticed the bloody hands. They then surveyed Willow and Tara's room where they get into a conversation about what had changed. After mentioning Giles the sound of a door echoed from downstairs. Spike called and Dawn answered. After a quick look at Buffy Dawn made her way back downstairs to meet him. Buffy followed quickly.

**-Foryer-**

Spike slammed the door angrily, looking up the stairs at Dawn, "Thank God. You scared me half to death ... or more to death. You - I could kill you."

Dawn walks slowly down the stairs, giving Spike a look, trying to clue him in. "Spike."

Spike wasn't hearing it, "I mean it. I could rip your head off one-handed and drink from your brain stem."

Dawn reaches the bottom of the stairs. Spike finally realizes something is up. "Look"

Dawn turns back just in time for Spike to see Buffy coming down the stairs behind her. Spike still wasn't clued in though, "Yeah? I've seen the bloody bot before. Didn't think she'd patch up so-"

He cut himself off as he stared at buffy. The slayer continued down the stairs returning his gaze. Dawn tried to explain, "She's kind of, um ... She's been through a lot ... with the ... death. But I think she's okay." Buffy suddenly notices her shirt is still unbuttoned and does up the last few buttons. Dawn looked at Spike, who continued to stare in disbelief. "Spike? Are you okay?"

Spike kind of answered, "I'm ... what did you do?"

Dawn got defensive, "Me? Nothing."

Buffy stared at Spike a little fearfully. As Spike looked her over though he came back to reality when he saw a bloody part, "Her hands."

Buffy lowered her hands and put them behind her back obviously uncomfortable. Dawn tried to explain, "Um, I was gonna fix them. I don't know how they got like that."

Spike shook his head and couldn't believe it, "I do. Clawed her way out of a coffin, that's how." He stared at Buffy, "Isn't that right?"

Buffy spoke at almost a whisper, "Yeah. That's... what I had to do."

Spike took the sympathetic road, "Done it myself actually." Throughout this, Spike continued to stare at her as if he was dreaming. He snapped out of it when he remembered her hands, "Um ... We'll take care of you. Come here." He extended his arm and guided Buffy intot he living room. He glanced back at Dawn quickly, "Get some stuff, uh, mercurochrome, bandages."

Dawn nods and walks off, "Okay."

Spike followed Buffy into the living room. She took her seat ont he sofa while he sat on the coffee-table facing her. He took her hands in his and examines them. Eventually he looks up at her face and thier eyes meet. Buffy got a curious look in her eyes, "How long was I gone?"

Spike answered without thinking, "Hundred forty-seven days yesterday. Uh ... hundred forty-eight today." He smiled a little, "Cept today doesn't count, does it?" Buffy didn't respond and there was a few silent seconds until Spike looked into her eyes again, "How long was it for you ... where you were?"

Buffy paused for a few seconds before answering, "It felt longer."

Dawn reappeared from the kitchen carrying medical supplies. "Got the stuff."

As she entered the living room, the front door burst open and the others rushed in. "Is she here?"

Anya answered, "She's here."

Xander stared at buffy, "We didn't know where you were."

The conversation continued like this for a while. Even as Spike discretely left and Buffy followed him with her eyes all the way out, everyone was bugging her about what they could do and what else could happen. Eventually Buffy told them she needed sleep and went upstairs. Xander and Anya went home, Dawn went to bed a little mad at Willow and Tara and then the witches slowly made their way to their bed also. The witches had a conversation that basically talked about what could be wrong with Buffy and why not one thank you was said. Willow had called Giles and he was on his was in the next day then everyone decided to sit in their rooms instead of actually sleeping. What a welcome back for Buffy Summers.

**-Next Day-**

Xander, Anya, Willow and Tara sat outside talking. Dawn was at school and Buffy hadn't been down yet. As usual lately they were actually talking about buffy. Anya was of course the blunt one, "Should she really be sleeping this long? I mean she didn't sleep this long before. maybe there really is something wrong with her."

Xander shook his head, "She just has to get used to being here again. Travelling dimensions while dead has to be tiring. Plus the traumatizing experience of hell."

Willow agreed, "Maybe she'll be up for talking later."

Anya shrugged, "What about patrolling? When can she start killing things again?"

That's when buffy walked up to them completely changed and holding a mug of coffee, "What about killing things?"

Willow smiled, "Buffy, you're up. Are you okay?"

Buffy completely ignored her and continued to stare at Anya, "What about killing things?"

Xander answered for Anya, "We were just wondering when you would be ready to start patrolling again."

Buffy shrugged, "As soon as possible."

Tara shook her head, "You know Buffy, it would be okay if you weren't ready."

Willow agreed, "She's right. You were in he...a very bad place and it's going to take a while to let go of that."

Buffy's head snapped to face Willow because she knew what Willow was going to say. Hell! After everything Buffy had done in the world her friends actually thought she would go to hell. She shook it off though and sighed, "I'm fine, I'll go tonight."

Anya stood up, "I should get to the magic Box though. It's almost sunset and I want to be open a few hours today."

Buffy put her coffee on the table and then put her hands in her back pockets, "We could go there."

Willow nodded and stood up, "Yeah, Dawn always meets us there after school anyway."

Xander stared at Buffy as he spoke, "I guess we go then."

Buffy quickly avoided his gaze and nodded, "Yeah."

**-Magic Box - Sunset-**

Dawn was doing her homework, Anya was helping a customer, Willow was reading, Xander was playing with something and Tara was just hanging around close to Willow. Buffy watched them all and still couldn't believe that she was back and how she felt. The whole time she was with Conner she felt alive for the first time and now that she was back she had to use all of her will power to stop herself from screaming at Willow and her friends for bringing her back. She lost a piece of her with Conner and now in the real world it was missing. The other really bad part of being back was how she was being treated. Every five minutes someone was asking her if she was okay or if she needed anything. There was only one person since she was back then knew how to talk to her and he didn't even talk that much.

At that thought buffy stood up suddenly, "I think I should patrol."

Willow looks hurt as Buffy walks towards the door. Xander stops her though, "Uh, do you want us to go with you?"

Buffy shook her head, "No. I-I need to go. Sorry."

Dawn agreed with her sister, "You should go." Buffy leaves and Dawn sighs obviously saddened, "I'll be safe here with the others. Don't worry about me."

**-Graveyard-**

Buffy walked slowly along, looking distracted. Her eyes were always on the sky looking for what she used to have and what she still wanted. She understood and remembered this world better but it didn't make her feel the same.

**-Spike's Crypt-**

On the lower level Spike paced back and forth restlessly. There's a little more furniture now: a chair, a bookcase with a lamp on it, etc. After pacing a little more he suddenly turned around and punched the wall. He laughed a little as he looked over his bloody hand but was interrupte dby a noise coming from the top level. He picked up a dagger and climbed the ladder. When he emerged he moved slowly and quietly into the crypt with the dagger by his side. There's a person standing by a table, looking at some spread out magazines.

After seeing the person he calms down, "Buffy." Buffy turned around and looked at him. Her expression was still basically blank. Spike softened his voice, "You should be careful. Never know what kind of villain's got a knife at your back."

Buffy ignored his words and stared at his hands, "Your hand is hurt."

"Hmm." He nods towards her hands, "Same with you."

Buffy looks down at her hands, "Right."

Buffy just stood there as Spike stared at her uncomfortabley, not sure exactly what to do. He walked over to the wall and put the knife down. He knew he would have to start the conversation but he also knew starting it with are you okay would be a mistake. "Willow's getting pretty strong, isn't she? Bringing you back. It's hard to get a good night's death around here." He tries a little laugh but gets no response. So he changes the subject, "You can sit down. Got furniture." Buffy sits on a chair. "You should see the downstairs, too, it's quite posh."

She looked over at him but didn't say a word. Spike walked over to her, sighed as he sat down on a table accross from her and began to speak the words he was finally ready to say. "Uh ... I do remember what I said. The promise. To protect her." He paused for a few seconds, "If I had done that ... even if I didn't make it ... you wouldn't have had to jump." Buffy still chose not to react and just sat there staring at him as he continued, "But I want you to know I did save you. Not when it counted, of course, but ... after that. Every night after that. I'd see it all again ... do something different. Faster or more clever, you know? Dozens of times, lots of different ways ... Every night I save you."

Out of no where Buffy grabbed his hand, "Don't worry about it. What happened...When I jumped...I felt right and you did everything you could. I don't remember everything or see really well but I know you Spike. You didn't break your promise, she's still safe. That's all I ever asked."

Spike smiled and gripped her hand doing everything possible to not cry. "I wouldn't break a promise like that."

Buffy stood up and started walking to the door, "They're all probably worried. I should go make their day."

Spike let go of her hand, "Are you happy?"

Buffy put on a faux smile and looked at him, "What do you think?"

Spike nodded, "Couldn't fool me."

Buffy's smile dissappeared, "That's what I thought." Then she walked out the door leaving Spike in the dark feeling a little better about himself then he did before she walked in his door.

**-Magic Box - Next Morning-**

The night before everyone waited on Buffy hand and foot the second she walked in the door. It was a bright sunny day, birds chirping, etc. Tara was sitting on a chair and Willow standing, both putting books on shelves. The door bell jingled which made Willow turn and smile.

"Buffy! Hey!"

Buffy walked in and Xander was next to greet, "Hey, you get Dawn off to school all right? 'Cause I was thinking, if you need help picking her up, I..."

Buffy shook her head, "It's okay. I got it." She started to get nervous, "Look, you guys, um, there's this thing ... so I'm just gonna say it." They all look expectantly at her. "You brought me back. I was in a ... I was in hell. I, um ... I can't think too much about what it was like. But it felt like the world abandoned me there. And then suddenly ... you guys did what you did."

Tara smiled, "It was Willow. She knew what to do."

That really hit Buffy and triggered an angry part inside her that she had to surpress as she noticed Willow's embarassed expression. Buffy still continued, "Okay. So you did that. And the world came rushing back. Thank you. You guys gave me the world. I can't tell you what it means to me." Willow now had tears in her eyes. "And I should have said it before."

Willow was flattered, "You're welcome."

Willow hugged Buffy but then Xander walked over to them and then wrapped his arms around both of them, "Welcome home Buffy."

They all hugged but Buffy's expression was still less than thrilled. When she finally got a break away from the group she claimed to need air and walked out into the alley behidn the magic shop.

Spike pulled her out of her thinking trance, "Buffy."

Buffy looked up to see Spike standing in the alley. She frowned as she saw the daylight, "Spike, it's daylight and you're-"

Spike interrupted, "Not on fire?" He looked up at the sky, "Sun's low enough, shady enough here." Buffy folded her arms around her middle and then Spike continued, "I was gonna go inside, but I overheard you and the Super-friends exchanging a special moment and I came over a bit queasy." Buffy wiped hair out of her face but didn't seem to be listening. "Say, aren't you leaving a hole in the middle of some soggy group hug?"

Buffy shrugged, "Just wanted a little time alone." She walks over, sits on a packing crate a few feet away from Spike. He gets up, starts to walk away, reaches the line of shadow, realizes he can't leave the alley without going into the sunlight. He stops, squints at the sky. "That's okay. I can be alone with you here."

He smiled, "Thanks ever so." He really stares at buffy and starts to walk back towards her, "Buff? ... Slayer? Are you okay?"

She isn't, but she composes herself and nods at him. "I'm here. I'm good."

Spike sat down beside her, "Buffy, if you're in ... if you're in pain ... or if you need anything... or if I can do anything for you..."

"You can't."

Spike continued to try and help, "Well, I haven't been to a hell dimension just of late, but I do know a thing or two about torment."

Buffy shook her head, "I never said anything about hell. After everything I was to this world, after everything I did, what made you all think that I was in hell?" Spike sat confused and Buffy explained, "I was happy." He was still confused as Buffy stared into her lap, "Wherever I ... was ... I was happy. At peace."

Spike stared at her in shock. He didn't need to say anything because buffy continued all on her own, "I knew that everyone I cared about was all right. I knew it. Time ... didn't mean anything ... I learned so much about me, about you, about Angel ... but I was still me, you know?" She glanced at him and then away again, "And I was warm ... and I was loved ... and I was finished. Complete. I don't understand a lot of it really but I know I was in a type of heaven."

Spike continued to stare at her in dismay as Buffy stayed in her little trance, "And now I'm not." She was almost tearful, "I was torn out of there. Pulled out ... by my friends." Spike continued to stare and to listen, "Everything here is ... hard, and bright, and violent. Everything I feel, everything I touch ... this is Hell. Just getting through the next moment, and the one after that ..." Her voice softened, "...knowing what I've lost..."

She looked up and realized that Spike is still there yet she still looked comfortable. Spike processed every word and despite everything he thought of himself, "What did you learn?"

Buffy turned to look him in the eye, "You have a good future Spike, a really good one."

He looked curious now, "What do you mean?"

For the first time since Buffy had been back she half smiled, "I hope you like kids Spike because you're going to have one."

Spike processed the words and all of a sudden started to smile, "Are you joking?" Buffy shook her head and Spike started pacing and laughing until he hit sunlight which brought him back to reality, "Do you know when? With who? How?"

Buffy shrugged, "I just know there will be a child in your future Spike."

Spike was exstatic, "Well, I finally have something to look forward to." Buffy nodded but when she realized she had nothing to look forward to she went back to her sullen state. Spike noticed and walked back to stand by her. He supressed his happiness with a sigh and an obvious hatred for his next question, "What did you learn about Angel?"

Buffy's smile went even wider now, "I met his son, Conner."

Spike was in shock, "What?"

Buffy nodded, "I had a choice. Short story is I walked into a door full of people who haven't been born yet. They wanted me to talk to and help Conner, Angel's son."

Spike nodded obviously jealous, "So, you know when his son is going to be born?"

Buffy slugged him and nodded, "Since he was there it means he was already concieved. He'll be born in less then nine months."

Spike shook his head, "God I hate that vampire."

Buffy suddenly came back to reality again as she realized she won't see Conner again. She stood up and let go of Spike's hand, "I should get back before they send a search party." Spike looked dissappointed until she spoke again, "You should come in, change the subject everytime they stare at me funny."

He nodded, "As long as you fill me in on what you learned later."

"You come patrolling with me tonight and I'll give you all the details. It feels nice to talk and not have it filled with complete anger and resentment."

Spike walked to the edge of the tent, "I have vampire hearing, my ears are always open."

Buffy smiled and then she realized something. Her face was serious once more, "They can never know Spike, never!" Spike nodded before both of them made the dash to the door hoping for Spike not to be ash when they got there.


	10. Dripping Revelations

**-Summer's House - Next Morning-**

Buffy and Spike patrolled together and as promised Buffy let everything leak about Conner and what dying was like. She smiled and cried while Spike was shocked and surprised most of the night. When the sun started to rise Spike was left with an unbelievable hatred for Willow and her friends for bringing her back yet a bitter sweet happiness. He cursed himself for ever believeing she could be in a hell dimension and she cursed the gang for ever thinking she was in the first place. Buffy had walked Spike back to his crypt and stayed for a few minutes but decided to get back before Dawn got off to school. She actually hugged him and spoke a sincere thanks before making her way back to her fake world.

Right now she was in the basement. Right before Dawn left for school she mentioned a leaky pipe that needed to be fixed. The slayer stared at the pipe while holding a wrench, "So. We meet at last, Mister Drippy."

Buffy raises the wrench, climbs up on something and begins fitting the wrench to the pipe. Willow appears from above, comes halfway down the stairs and sits on them, "Want me to call the plumber?"

Buffy continued to turn the wrench with great effort, "No."

Willow knew she was trying to be stubborn, "You sure?"

"Yes."

The witch held up the cordless phone, "Got the number."

Buffy turned to face Willow exasperated, "Willow, I'm on it, okay?"

Willow shrugged skeptically and Buffy gave the pipe one last twist. The dripping stopped and Buffy smiled with satisfaction, "Ah." After a few groaning noises water suddenly begins to spray from a dozen different places all over the basement. Several jets of water spray directly on Willow, soaking her. Willow shrieked and ran up the stairs while Buffy stood still and sighed, "There. All better."

**-Later In Kitchen-**

Willow and Tara stood near the island of the kitchen while Buffy stood leaning on the doorway wall mesmerized by the sink. Willow couldn't believe the sound of the pipes, "How much water can they fit in one set of pipes?"

Tara smiled, "If I understand right? The entire city water supply."

Willow continued to stare at the basement, "Told you we should have called the plumber."

Buffy continued to stare at the sink. "You were right. The plumber will make everything good."

That's when Xander and another guy emerge from the basement. All the women turn to look at them while Xander makes his big enterence, "And a big Sunnydale round of applause for Tito the Amazing, plumber extraordinaire."

Tara smiled, "So how's everything down there?"

Xander couldn't help but turn to his usual jokes, "Like we should start gathering up two of every animal."

Tito explained the serious version, "Basically, your pipes are shot. I mean, the whole system's gonna have to be replaced. What you need is a full copper re-pipe job."

Tito hands Willow a piece of paper and Willow suddenly has the need to make sure she heard him right, "Full copper re-pipe? That sounds potentially pricey."

Tito nodded, "Well, if you have any questions, our number's on the invoice."

Tito pat Xander on the shoulder and left. Tara examined the invoice before Willow could pull it away, "That's a weird phone number. Oh, wait..." She stares at Xander, "Is that the bill?"

Xander tried to make them see from his P.O.V, "Hey. Tito cut you a good deal down there. Those are his bargain prices. I did a little haggling for you."

Buffy finally zapped out of her phase on the sink, "Thank you. So we'll pay him, what's the big deal?"

The others exchange looks until Willow strated to explain something, "Um... Buffy, I...I know you're still getting back on your feet after..."

Buffy cut her off, "Lying flat on my back?"

Willow nodded and continued her explanation, "Yeah. Uh, but there's some money stuff we're going to have to talk to you about."

Willow guides Buffy to a sitting position in the living room while tara gathers a few papers and lies them out on the coffee table. Just the sight of all the papers in front of her surprised her and she even had some in her hand now. She gave a disbelieveing sigh and after looking through them all she threw the papers down, "Okay... So, you're telling me I'm broke?"

Willow, Tara and Xander sat accross from her as Willow began to answer, "Not yet, but..."

Tara continued, "Money is defenitely becoming an issue."

Xander finished, "As in you're almost out of it."

Buffy couldn't believe it, "But I haven't spent any money. I was all ... dead and frugal."

Willow tried to calm her, "I know, this comes as a bit of a shock after ... a bit of a shock, but ... it took us by surprise too."

Tara tried another appraoch, "Your mother prepared everything really well. She had insurance ... life insurance."

Xander's nervous voice echoed as he spoke, "Which should have left you covered, but ... hospital bills..."

Willow finished, "Pretty much sucked up all the money."

Tara thought about it, "Which you're still hemorrhaging, by the way."

Buffy was still confused, "How am I doing that?"

Tara explained her statement, "No, not you, the house. Uh, see, this house, just sitting here, doing nothing, um, by itself costs money."

Xander looked around a little pepped up, "So the question is, what do we do now?"

Buffy shrugged, "Easy. We burn the house to the ground and collect the insurance." Everyone looks worried as Buffy continued, "Plus, fire? Pretty." Everyone stared at her in silence, "You guys, I'm kidding. Okay, it's, it's bills, it's money. It's pieces of paper sent by bureaucrats that we've never even met. It's not like it's the end of the world." She thinks about that for a few minutes, "Which is too bad, you know, 'cause that, I'm really good at."

Xander actually agreed, "Yeah, if the hellmouth opened we could hope that it burns the house down."

Buffy started looking around the room obviously worried. She knew humor wasn't going to solve it but it made everyone else happy. It was then she came accross a picture of Dawn and suddenly got serious, "Does Dawn know about this?" Willow shook her head, "I want to keep it that way. She doesn't need to worry about this."

All three of them hesitantly nodded and everythign went silent. it stayed that way until Xander stood up, "I should go see Anya at the store before I go to work. Ciao ladies."

The girls waved as Xander walked out. Buffy stood up next, "I have to go get ready. Looks like I have to apply for a loan."

Willow smiled, "Good luck." Tara smiled also for emphasis but buffy didn't react at all as he made her way upstairs.

**-Magic Box - After Sunset-**

Buffy had just finished telling Willow the story about the loan clerks that day. A demon attacked and she saved the guy but still no loan. As the slayer hit the punching bag in the training room Willow started her rant, "Even if the bank did get robbed, which, you battling demons couldn't possibly know ... you would think there would be some kind of reward. But no, they're like, Oh, we're not gonna give you money unless you prove you don't need it. I mean, what kind of system is that?"

Buffy continued to hit harder and faster every time, "You're asking the wrong gal."

Willow was surprised, "Hey. Buffy, you're mad."

Buffy stops punching the bag, "You noticed huh?" She shrugged, "It'll pass."

As she resumed her punching Willow was really happy, "No! Anger ... is a big, powerful emotion you should feel."

Buffy just stood there now and steadied the bag, "Well ... that's good then. It's gone now."

Willow sighed in dissappointment, "No. You have to get angry again."

"Why?"

Willow thouht about it for a few seconds, "Well, since you've been back, you haven't exactly been big with...the whole range of human emotions thing. You zone out when things get important and a lot of the time you don't react to things. Like with the bills today, you didn't get mad or anything."

Buffy shrugged, "You know Willow, I'm really trying okay. I'm doing everything I can and I'm trying to do it perfectly just for you but I'm not perfect and I never have been. I feel fine so I'm going to act the way I feel."

Although Buffy knew acting the way she felt would scare everyone she was in complete satisfaction as Willow went quiet. Willow sensed her frustration so she only nodded, "Maybe we should check on your bank demon."

**-Main Room Of Magic box-**

Anya was getting mad at Xander for not telling everyone about the engagement yet again while Dawn was trying to research. Tara talked he rout of research with a gross picture. This is when Willow and buffy walked in.

Xander looked around to avoid Anya, "You know, I still don't get it. I mean, what kind of a demon would rob a bank?"

Anya smiled, "The kind that wants money."

Xander tried to look sarcastic, "What do you even call that?"

Dawn held up a book though, "This?"

Buffy stared at it, "That's him."

Dawn smiled, "It' called... I'm guessing it's MmmFashnik. Like Mmm, cookies."

"Big bad. This thing was strong, guys. No weapons that I could see, but ..." Buffy notices something across the room, stares that way as her mouth finishes the sentence on its own. "... still ... real ... dangerous."

The others turn to follow her gaze only to be greeted by Giles at the door holding a few suitcases staring at buffy. Despite her decaying feelings inside Buffy couldn't help but feel hope as she smiled at her fatherly fiure. They somehow got to the point of standing face to face and inches away from each other and stay like that for a few minutes before Giles finally get's up the courage to hug her. She hugs him back with a lot of her strength but kept her eyes closed.

Giles started the convo first, "You're alive. You're here. And you're still ..." He starts to feel a little back pain, "...remarkably strong."

Buffy lookes confused, "Huh? Oh." She realizes that she squeezed him too hard and let him go, "Sorry."

Giles smiled and continued to express his shock, "Willow told me, but I didn't really let myself believe ..."

Buffy shrugged, "I take a little getting used to. I'm still getting used to me." The others admire the relationship as Giles puts his hand on Buffy's cheek and looks at her fondly.

**-Magic Box - Training Room - Later-**

Giles and Buffy talked about everything including Giles' inconveniant trip back to Sunnydale and Buffy traumatizing dreams from waking up buried alive in her own coffin. When Giles left her alone much more was revealed about the demon and eventually everyone made their way home.

**-Some Basement-**

The bank robbing demon is yelling at the nerds we know as Jonathan, Warren and Andrew. He talks about a deal and how he got them the money so now he wants the head of the slayer. The nerds end up giving the demon Buffy's address to save their lives while they get to keep the money the demon stole from the bank.

**-Summer's Porch-**

Buffy walked out to the porch only to escape everything she could hear. Giles and Willow just finished an arguement about her and how she should or shouldn't of come back. On top of that she had the conversation about money, life and the future she already had with giles when she was setting up his couch. The last thing Buffy heard Giles say to Willow was that he was sure Buffy had come out of all this damaged. She was deep in her thoughts until a cigarette butt suddenly landed on the porch by Buffy's feet. She looked down, put her foot on it and grinded it out.

Without looking up or smiling she spoke, "Hello, Spike."

Spike stoo don the lawn and obviously had been there for a while, "You hear all that noise?"

Buffy knew he was referring to giles and Willow so she only nodded, "Just enough tomake me feel crappy."

Spike of course took the friend appraoch, "You know watcher-boy doesn't mean anything by it."

Spike walked a little closer and stepped up to the first stair. Buffy shrugged, "I guess. Everyone ..." She paused for a while, "...they all care. They all care so much, it ... makes it all harder."

Spike took a step up to the second step, "I'm not sure I followed you around that bend, luv."

Buffy tried to explain, "I don't know. I just, I feel like I'm spending all of my time trying to be okay, so they don't worry. It's exhausting. And then, I..."

She trails off, makes a frustrated gesture and then clenches her hand into a fist just in time for Spike to finish her sentence, "And that makes 'em worry even more." Buffy looks at him but doesn't reply. Spike walked the rest of the way up onto the porch and came to stand next to her. He watched the slayer stare out intot he darkness, "You want me to take them out? Give me a hell of a headache, but I could probably thin the herd a little."

After a moment Buffy smiles a little. Spike looked pleased, "Knew I could get a grin."

They exchange a look and Buffy moved forward to sit on the top stair. She sighed deeply as Spike sat down beside her, "Why are you always around when I'm miserable?"

Spike shrugged, "Cause that's when you're alone, I reckon. I'm not one for crowds myself these days."

They look at each other again, "Me neither."

Spike smiled, "That works out nicely then."

Buffy ran her fringers through her hair and decided she should talk to Spike, "You know, Willow told me I haven't had emotions since I was back."

Spike shook his head, "Lately the witch thinks she knows everything. I wouldn't read too much into it. Plus even if you neglect to smile here and there none of them would blame you."

Buffy nodded, "I guess." They sit there quietly, staring out at the night for a long time until Buffy started being random, "So what do you know about finances?" Spike just stared at her completely clueless

**-Later-**

The demon attacked right in the middle of the Spike and Buffy porch conversation and wrecked the pipe in the basement again. Buffy ended up drowning it and then walked Spike a little ways home. When she got back the sun had risen and everyone was fixing up the living room. Almost everything had broken at least once. The real drama came when the phone rang.

Buffy looked curious as she got up, "Who's calling me? Everybody I know lives here." She walked towards the kitchen, "I'll be back."

She walked towards the kitchen and when she returned she was walking fast, purposely towards the front door. She pretty much ignored Giles and made sure everyone knew how important it was that she leave now. She mentioned Angel and somewhat where she was going right befor she took off. The second she walked out she left Dawn and Giles staring at each other in dismay in the trashed living room.

**_A/N -_** _I know sucky and to the script but WOW are you B/A fans going to love the next chapter. i love writing it and it just made me more obsessed with the Buffy/Angel relationship. I hope you like._


	11. Angel and The Beach Perfection

**-L.A.-**

Since Angel had gotten back from his much needed trip that helped him deal with his grief a lot had happened. Gunn almost killed him, Cordy's visions almost killed her, he got a reminder from an old friend that took his own heart out so he could be invincible of what love really means. Right now he was getting over the fact that an old guy took over his body and the fact Fred likes him. He stood in the lobby staring at Fred who was sitting in the garden and he started to think about what he should say to her. When he started to get an idea he began to make his way out to the garden court to sit with Fred.

When he sat down fred shifted a little and Angel found out just how awkward this was going to be. "Hey."

Fred smiled at him, "Hey. - How's your head? S-sorry about all that..."

Fred made some hitting movements and Angel thought nothing of the statement, "Ah, I - gather I - had it coming."

Fred agreed, "Mmm. - Yes."

Angel paused for a while before starting to talk again, "Fred , I've been meaning to talk to you about something."

Fred put her book down, "Okay." Angel sat there silently staring into the night for a few seconds until fred got impatient, "Is this about how you're not like other men - what with that curse and all... and how you're really fond of me, but that's as far at it goes?"

Angel was kind of surprised, "Uhm... - yeah."

Fred chuckled a little bit, "Cordelia explained it to me. She said you'd probably just screw it up."

Angel reluctantly agreed, "Oh, she did, did she? - And she's probably right."

Fred sighed and then stared at the ground. Angel looked curious so Fred expressed her thoughts, "It's like something out of Fitzgerald. - The man who can have everything but love. - Well, maybe in some ways you're better off, because love is... - Well, in a way it's everything. - But it's also heartache and disappointment. - And those are good things to avoid."

Angel was listening very closely until Cordelia interrupted Fred's rant by rushing out to the garden court. She defenitely had something important to say so when Angel and Fred snapped their head toards her Cordy spoke breathless, "Angel, She's alive! Buffy's alive!"

After speaking Cordy turned and rushed back into the hotel. Angel processed what Cordelia just said as he stared at Fred. When it finally sunk in that Buffy was back Angel jumped up and over the seat before running into the hotel after Cordy.

**-Secluded Part Of A Beach-**

Buffy stood barefoot in the sand just close enough for the water to brush her feet. She shivered a little bit as she crossed her arms and closed her eyes. Her calm feelings brought her back to the days of silence in the fields full of sunlight and happiness but when she opened her eyes dissappointment filled the air. It was so dark and Conner wasn't there. The only thing she was looking forward to was the surprise and ultimate happiness in Angel's eyes the second he showed up. She made the decision on her way to not tell Angel what she knew about Conner, she wanted him to be a surprise. It excited her to know that she would be seeing him also in a few months because Buffy knew Angel would call her if he ever had a son or whenever he had a son!

She was deep in thought but was interrupted by a feeling she got. The hairs on the back of her neck stood up, goosebumps covered her body and the feeling that she was no longer alone surfaced. Only one man could make her feel that way. She didn't turn around already knowing Angel was getting out of his car. She waited a few seconds and took a deep breath before turning around only to find Angel a few feet away from her. They both stopped and stared at each other like they couldn't believe this was all real but when Buffy shed her first tear they walked extremely fast to meet each other half way. Angel wrapped his arms around her and gripped like there was no tomorrow. Buffy buried her head in the crook of his neck and took in the surreal fact that they were actually there, that he was hugging her, that he actually came.

Angel just wouldn't let her go, he even managed to start crying a little, "Oh god, I can't believe it's you."

Buffy agreed and through her tears she smiled, "I missed you so much."

Both of them held each other like it was all a dream, like they would dissappear if they ever let go. They stood in each other's arms mumbling their 'I miseed yous' and 'I can't believe it' for the longest time. Eventually when it finally registered in the lovers minds that it was all real Angel lead her to a sitting position in the sand. She instantly sat between his legs, lent against his chest, moved her head to his shoulder and wrapped his hands in hers. They stayed silent for the longest time while they finished crying and enjoyed each others company.

Buffy was the one to finally break the silence. She spoke in a soft voice, almost a whisper, "I dreamt about this for so long. A part of me is hoping I never wake up."

Angel gripped her hand tighter, "You're not the only one."

Buffy smiled, "You know when I...fell, that felt real. Every moment since I've been back has felt like a dream or a different reality."

Angel smiled back at her, "This is real Buffy, you better be real."

They fell into another comfortable silence. As Angel looked her over he noticed the healing marks on her knuckles. The only reason they were attracting him was usual marks such as those would of healed already and also when he touched them a quick memory flash went through his head about the night he crawled out of his grave.

Curiousity and worry surged through him, "What happened to your hand?"

Honestly, for the first time since she had been back Buffy had forgotten about the coffin marks on her knuckles. All of a sudden every emotion of loneliness, anger and pain came rushing back to her. She tried to hide each feeling while telling Angel the truth, "I um... When Willow brought me back they forgot to take me out of the coffin and uh..."

Angel cursed Willow and every bit of magic as he finished Buffy's sentence, "You had to dig out of your own grave." Buffy only nodded and if it was possible Angel held her a little closer. "How could they be so stupid? How could Willow...?"

Buffy started tried to calm him down, "They were doing what they thought was best. Willow thought me being here was best."

The part that saddened Angel the most was that Buffy didn't sound believable, "Who are you trying to convince Buffy, me or you?"

Buffy knew she was caught instantly and decided there would be no bad outcome if she talked to Angel, there never was. "I can't even look at any of them without being angry or having flashes of what it was like when I wasn't here." She turned her body so she could look Angel in the eyes, "They think I was in hell Angel, they think after everything I've done for this world that I would be suffering my after life in hell. That's why they brought me back, they thought they were doing me a favor. They didn't even bother to try and find out if I was in hell or not."

Angel could sense her rising anger so he began to rub her arm and tried to keep calm himself, "Where were you?"

Buffy put a smile on her face. Angel was at least happy she wasn't ready to hit anyone anymore, "I was happy. I met Whistler and he taught me everything. There was no such thing as time or pain. No demons or problems. Oh god it was everything I've ever wanted. I missed everyone but I got to see you, I got to make sure you guys were okay. After a while I didn't need to see you guys anymore, I was starting to let go but out of no where...God why did Willow have to do that to me? When I came back I was confused and I couldn't see straight. There were demons and a lot of fire... I came back into this world thinking it was hell, thinking I was being punished for something because nobody should feel that kind of pain."

Angel noticed a few tears and wiped them away. He didn't even know where to begin, "Look Buffy, I am sorry you had to leave, I am sorry your friends were too stupid to think before they did anything, I am sorry that you're in pain now but don't think for a second that I'm sorry you're back." Buffy moved into a sitting position so she could look Angel in the eyes, "You deserve so much more then this Buffy Summers and I'm always going to be here for you if you need anything."

Buffy wiped away a tear, "Hey, still the one freaky thing in my freaky world that still makes sense to me." They both giggled at the memory of her words. When they calmed down buffy thought this would be the best time to praise him a little, "You know I learned a lot about life and about you while I was dead." Angel was suddenly intrigued as she continued, "I learned that when you do good things you get a reward and uh...yours is coming up pretty soon."

Angel put on his flirty, mysterious half smile, "What is it?"

Buffy put on her flirty smile, "It's my turn to be cryptic." Suddenly though, just thinking about Conner gave her a little thrill of happiness. She slowly stood up, "It's going to be amazing. You'll be so close to happy you might just lose your soul."

She helped Angel to stand up as he still looked curious, "Just tell me Buffy. It's gonna drive me crazy."

Buffy shook her head and finger before closing her eyes and swaying in the wind. Angel knew this was the first time in a while she had been able to even smile. He watched in admiration for a while until he couldn't help himself. When Buffy was faced another way he got close enough to trip her. She let out a small yelp but Angel was there in time to catch her. She started laughing as he smiled at her happiness. Even he hadn't been able to smile this much since she had died. I guess they must of been comfortable because neither one moved from the position Angel had caught her in, the position like a dip in a tango.

When they stopped laughing and smiling all there was to do was stare into the others eyes until even that became too intense. As if it were on both of their minds, Angel and Buffy closed their eyes and lent in for a mutual kiss, a kiss both of them had been trying to resist since the beginning of the night. Eventually the kiss became a little more passionate because they both made their way to a lying down position in the sand. It was defenitely about to escalate to a place they knew they shouldn't go to when they were interrupted by Angel's Cell phone. The second it rang the kissing stopped and the lovers stared at each other awkwardly.

By the third ring Buffy smiled, "Maybe you should get that."

Angel slowly removed himself from his position on top of Buffy and sat himself down on the sand. He answered his phone, "Angel."

Buffy could hear Cordelia's voice throughthe phone, "You guys didn't do it right?"

Buffy laughed as she sat up while Angel smiled and stared at Buffy before answering, "No Cordelia. I have to go."

Cordelia wouldn't let him off that easy, "Maybe you should get back soon. The longer you're with her the more the chance you'll come back evil."

"Bye Cordy."

"Tell Buffy I said hi." Buffy yelled hi really loud, "She can hear me?"

Angel tried not to laugh, "The whole world can you Cordy. I'll see you when I get back."

He hung up the phone and Buffy smiled, "She must've known."

Angel nodded, "You died and we still can't even be around each other."

Buffy smiled, "We must really love each other."

Angel stood up, "That's never been the question."

Buffy then stood up and shrugged not really wanting to talk about him and her, "Looks like you have to take off though huh?"

Angel nodded, "I should." Buffy only nodded, "You going to leave too?"

Buffy shook her head, "I think I may just stay a little longer, There's nothing to hide from when you're alone." Angel only nodded again before almost turning around towards his car almost dissappointed. Buffy smiled, "I'll walk you to your car though."

Angel looked back at her and couldn't beleive a woman so amazing could love him. She walked up to him and he wrapped his arm around her waist while they walked to his car. They stayed silent the whole way right up until they stood in front of the drivers door. She looked over the car, "Nice. Angel finally made it to this century."

Angel smiled, "It was bound to happen."

Slowly Buffy wrapped her arms around Angel for a hug which he returned. They held each other like this for a while. Angel whispered in her ear, "So what's my reward?"

Buffy smiled and moved her head so she could look at his face, "You'll know it when you see it."

Even though she was laughing, smiling and giggling Angel could see the sadness slowly returning to the slayers eyes. He couldn't show his resentment and anger for her friends now but when he did he felt sorry for whoever was around at that moment. When Buffy was about to look away Angel lifted her chin up and he lent down for a kiss. A kiss filled with passion and love, a kiss that Buffy was going to remember for a long time. This time niether one of them let it escalate and they pulled away at the same time.

Buffy rested her head on his chest, "I'm going to miss you so much."

Angel used every bit of self control in him not to pick this slayer up in his arms and take her off to a place where no one could ever bother her again. He kissed the top of her head, "I am so glad you're back." Buffy pulled away finally and stood in front of him with her arms wrapped around her middle. Angel saw her shiver and removed his coat only to place it on the shoulders of Buffy Summers. "You're cold."

Buffy nodded, "It's a little big." She gripped it and stared into Angel's eyes hoping he would remember, "You're leaving soon, you should take it."

Angel winked, "It looks better on you."

Buffy smiled, "I always did look good in your clothes."

Angel only pulled her close again and wrapped his arms around her, "I love you Buffy Summers so be careful. I don't know if I could deal with you dying again."

Buffy let a few tears fall, "Oh god, I love you so much Angel." They stayed like that until Buffy stopped crying. She slowly stepped back, "You should get going. Uh... You can't die either okay?"

Angel nodded, "I promise I will try not to die."

Buffy smiled, "Good. Me too. I'll uh... Let's not make death the next reason we see each other okay?" Angel nodded and Buffy continued, "You know, you'd think we'd be good at goodbyes."

Angel agreed, "Yet somehow doing it more then once just makes it harder."

Buffy backed up a little more, "I'll make it easier. Goodbye Angel, I'll uh...I'll see you later."

She turned her back and walked back towards the water. Angel watched her for the longest time before finally getting in his car and driving away. Buffy knew he was watching so when he drove away she finally looked back and shed one tear as she watched him drive out of her life yet again. She looked up at the sky hoping the one person she never got to say goodbye to was listening. She smiled, "Goodbye Conner."

Buffy was about to go home until she heard footsteps in the sand. She turned around instantly but calmed down when she saw who it was. A giant smile was put on her face as she wrapped her arms around a sullen looking man screaming his name, "Whistler."


	12. Confusion marks The Slayer

_**A/N -** Spike and Buffy don't kiss unless I write it! By the by, reviews have been amazing. Don't once think they don't mean a bunch to me._

**-Beach-**

Whistler tried to smile but it didn't come off so good. Buffy let him go and finally noticed. She backed off to let him explain, "Hey kid."

"What's going on Whistler? What happened? Why don't I get to see him anymore?"

Whistler calmed her down and explained, "The oracles think you are of best use to him down in this world."

Buffy shook her head, "They're wrong. What if he remembers that feeling Whistler? Being lied to and abandoned... I don't want that for him. Why didn't they warn me?"

Whistler shrugged, "I don't know why Buffy, believe me if I did I'd tell you."

Buffy ignored her anger and curiousity for a few seconds, "How is he?"

Whistler looked at the ground, "Not too good."

Buffy cursed herself and the powers, "I thought this wasn't possible."

Whistler agreed, "I did too until it happened. Look Buffy I'm sorry."

Buffy igored that, "Why are you here now? They'd only send you if there was something useful."

Whistler nodded, "Conner's birth is not the right time for you to see him." Buffy was about to interrupt but Whistler wouldn't let her, "You're going to have to make a decision to help someone in the future. The outcome of that decision will determine wheather you see him or not."

"Why can't I see him when he's born?"

Whistler shrugged, "I don't know. I hate giving you this type of news and I know you hate hearing it. All I can say is I'm really really sorry."

Buffy processed what he said, "Tell Conner I love him, I'm unbelievably sorry and that I'm going to see him again. Can you do that?"

Whistler nodded, "I will."

"Good. I should get back to the hellmouth. Everybody's probably fussing over who should ask me to do what next."

Whistler called after her, "He misses you." Buffy turned around. "That's all he says and that's in his sleep."

Buffy called back, "I miss him so much more." Whistler nodded and Buffy went back to her car. When she looked back at the beach Whistler was gone and she was teary at the wheel. God she hated this life this time around...

**-Spike's Crypt - Sunnydale - Couple Weeks Later-**

Buffy had come back to Sunnydale only to find out she was no good in the real world. Being a carpenter hated her, magic store repeatedly tormented her, school went by too fast andthe shadowy alcohol life didn't too well either. She did come to one conclusion though, Spike was the one to go to for life advice, just without the alcohol. He's the only one who actually saw what being a slayer meant and on some level that meant more to her then being seen as a real person even though she always said she wanted to be normal.

Right now she was barging into Spike's crypt to tell him about a vampire bite earlier. She burst in already holding her stake, "Get your gear together. We need to..." She pauses as she realizes Spike's not there. She looks around, "Spike?"

Spike's voice echoes the crypt, "You know..." Buffy jumped and turned to find SPike behind her still talking, "...in civilized cultures, that's called trespassing."

Buffy ignored him, "Good thing you're uncivilized. We got trouble."

"Giles found you?"

Buffy didn't understand, "Giles? No. Was he looking for me?"

Spike realized she didn't know, "Yeah, it's Dawn."

Buffy was more alarmed then before, "Dawn? Why, what happened?"

Spike calmed her down, "No, it's okay, Giles was by here earlier looking for you. Dawn and her little friend pulled a Houdini. Up to a bit of candy-corn mischief, I suspect."

"Wait, she's out there running around by herself?" He only nodded, "Looks like Halloween is no longer quiet. Found a girl about Dawn's age with bite marks in her neck. Considering our past on halloween and the fact Dawn's vulnerable this time..."

Spike interrupted, "We have to find her. I did a sweep of the tunnels, Giles is poking about the cemetery." Buffy opened a coffin by the wall, "I don't think she's in there." Buffy grabbed a few weapons and tosses Spike a crossbow.

**-Hyperion - L.A. Same Time As Sunnydale-**

Since the Buffy meeting Angel met Fred's parents who tried to take her away and found a prophecy that says the world is going to end. the confusing thing that had happened was getting closer to Cordelia. He felt himself becoming closer, they were always friends but they were almost more then that now. He had been training her and spending more time with her. He didn't know if he liked her in a way more then a friend but he knew they were closer.

Right now he was expressing that, "That's really all I was trying to say, that we've been through so much together, you and me, as friends. You've seen the - good, - and the not so good."

Cordy walked back to her desk, "Just like you have in me. And for the record the good I've seen far outweighs the bad."

The convo paused for a few seconds before Angel spoke, "Thanks. You, too."

Cordy smiled, "Hey, what are friends for?"

That's when Darla's voice interrupted, "If you ask me, they're for knocking you up and leaving you high and dry." Angel spun around to see a very pregnant Darla standing on the top landing leading down into the lobby from outside. She winked at him, "Hello, lover. Long time no see."

Angel was extremely surprised, "Darla."

Cordy repeated, "Darla?"

Then everyone go into who she is to Angel and her story. Angel interrupted them, "Well, when did this happen?"

Darla walked down the steps, "You know exactly when it happened."

Cordy looked at Angel, "Angel - did - you and Darla...?"

Angel was speechless, "Uh..." Cordy glares at him but he looks at Darla, "This is impossible."

Darla only agreed, "Tell me about it daddy."

Cordy was still staring at Angel, "You slept with her?"

Angel continued to avoid Cordelia, "Vampires can't have children. Wesley?"

Wesley confirmed it, "Ah, no, he's right. It's not possible."

Cordy was still trying to make her point, "That's not what I asked."

Darla was already annoyed, "You know we can't. I know we can't. But we did." After a pause and a long glare at Angel Darla's voice got darker, "What did you do to me?"

She hit Angel accross the face and he stumbled back against the weapns cabinet behind him. Cordy steps between them, "Stop that!" Angel tried to tell her he's okay but she ignores him now, "You'll hurt her! Haven't you done enough?" She turned to Darla, "Here, sit down. You should get off your feet." She then lead Darla to a sitting position on a chair and then looked back at everyone else, "Can we get her some water?"

Fred went to get it instantly while Angel expressed his concerns, "Cordy that's Darla. Maybe you don't want to..."

Cordy ignored him and asked the question she had been asking the whole time, "Did you or did you not look me in the eye and say that you would never do a thing like this with her?"

Darla smiled, "Oh, he lied? What a surprise."

Fred came back in carrying a glass of water, "Hi. I'm Fred. Is water okay, or did you want some blood?"

Darla took the glass as Wesley pulled Fred back away from Darla. Angel was still staring at Cordy though trying to explain, "Cordy. I'm sorry - I lied. It was just - it was a very dark time."

Cordy wasn't pleased with the explanation, "Oh! You used her to make you feel better during your dark time. Well, that makes it all heroic."

Angel continued to try and explain, "It wasn't like that. It just - happened. It wasn't like I went evil or anything, I just..."

Cordy finished it off for him, "You just went male." She then turned towards darla again, "Have you been to a doctor?"

Darla stares at her, "No. But I have been to every shaman and seer in the western hemisphere. They don't know what it is. They don't know what it means. Nothing like this has ever happened."

Angel avoids Darla's look as Cordy tends to her, "What can we do for you?"

"Well, you can get you little gang of supernatural detectives to find out what the hell is happening to me and how to stop it."

Cordy was staring at Darla as she started to speak, "Are you gonna take some responsibility here?" She then turned around to look Angel int he eye, "Angel?"

Angel realizes who she's talking to, "Oh, me? - Of course I am. - Wes, lets get on this right now."

Wesley has no idea what to look for, "What do you suggest?"

Angel was still obviously having some trouble adjusting, "I suggest you use your books and find out what's going on. What, do I have to think of everything?"

Wes picked up a random book from the counter and opened it. "Oh here it is." Angel walked over to him while Darla straightened up in her seat. Dissappointment went around when Wes spoke again, "It says 'I have absolutely no idea what's going on." He shut the book and looked at Angel, "We should talk to the host."

**-Sunnydale - Spike's crypt - A Few Days Later-**

During the past couple of days Buffy could feel Conner and how close he was to being born. She had to constantly remind herself what Whistler said and refraid from running to L.A. Plus everything in Sunnydale had gotten real emotional. During the town musical buffy revealed to everyone how much she didn't want to be alive, Spike saved her, then Willow made everyone forget who they were, Giles left and now she was sitting in silence with Spike in his crypt. They were watching some black and white horror movie on mute, both making cracks here and there about what should really be done. As the movie ended Buffy turned to stare at Spike.

Out of no where unexpected words popped out of her mouth, "Spike, is there something wrong with me?"

Spike was completely confused, "What? No of course not."

Buffy shrugged, "Everything just feels so different, like the only place I'm comfortable is here which is defneitely not the way I used to be. Everythings upside down and it just feels like...Maybe I came back wrong."

Spike shook his head, "Buffy, even vampires need time to get into the right way of the world again. All you need is time."

Buffy nodded, "Maybe. It just all feels like a dream."

Spike smiled, "I can prove that it's not."

He reached over and pinched her arm, "OW."

They sat in silence for a few seconds until they both yelled the same two words at the same time, "THE CHIP"

Spike stood up, "I didn't feel any pain."

Buffy stood next, "Well I did so you should of. Maybe I did come back wrong."

Spike wouldn't accept that as an answer, "Or maybe the chip finally malfunctioned."

"Hit me." Spike's face was completely confused so she expained, "Let's see if you can really hit me. If you can hit me we'll go see if you can hit other good people."

Spike shook his head, "I'm not going to hit you."

Buffy smiled, "I can make you hit me Spike." She socked him in the face with a left, then she socked him in the face with a right causing him to retaliate and knock her accross her face. Buffy yelled, "OW." She then looked at Spike, "Did you feel anything?"

Spike shook hsi head, "No."

Buffy sat back down, "Maybe I really did come back wrong."

Spike grabbed her hand and lead her out of the crypt. She complained all the way until Spike finally came to a stop when they got to main street. Buffy realized what he was doing and lead him to the alley. Spike waited for someone to come by and he jumped out and scared them, shaking them in the process. His chip went off and the person ran screaming.

Buffy slid down the wall to a sitting position, "I knew something was wrong with me."

Spike moved ot her side, "Buffy, there's nothing wrong with you. I honestly don't know why I can hit you, I know why it felt good but I don't know why I could do it but it's not because you came back wrong. It's not because of you."

Buffy started crying, "Everything is just so wrong. Giles left, Tara left Willow because of too much magic, Dawn's always alone at home, I spend most of my time with a vampire I'm supossed to hate but don't and the worst part is, I can feel him SPike. I can feel Conner trying to come into this world and I can't do anything about it."

Spike knew what Whistler said because Buffy had been telling him everything lately, "Come on slayer, you hit a rough patch in the road we call life. You're so much stronger then this."

Buffy shook her head, "I can't be anymore."

Spike grabbed her shoulders and made her listen, "You're always going to be strong. You may not see it slayer but you're the one person in this world everyone couldn't live without. You are needed so much more then you think and you can handle it. You're holding onto Conner like you're never going to see him again and we both know you will. Now stop crying and let's go find out why I can hit you."


	13. Feel Me Like I feel You

**-Outside Of Blown-Up Caritas - Same Time as Sunnydale-**

Angel lowered Darla to the ground and then crouched down besid her. Everyone but Fred ran to get the car. He was trying to make Darla fele better, "I got you. You're gonna be okay."

Darla wouldn't allow herself to believe it, "No. No, I don't think so. Once he's gone, I won't be okay. I won't be okay at all. I don't know what I'll be. Angel, our baby is gonna die right here in this alley. You died in an alley, remember?"

Angel nodded, "I remember."

Darla continued, "I wanna say I'm sorry. I wanna say it and mean it, but I can't. Aren't you gonna tell me it's okay?"

"No."

Darla only agreed, "No? It's really not, is it? We did so many terrible things together. So much destruction, so much pain. We can't make up for any of it. You know that don't you?"

Angel paused before answering, "Yeah."

"This child...Angel, it's the one good thing we ever did together." Angel lifted Darla's hand between both of his and pressed them against his lips, "The only good thing." He buried his face in his hands still holding onto Darla's as he took a sobbing breath, "You make sure to tell him that."

Darla was holding one of the splinters and Angel didn't notice until it was too late. She buries it into her chest and when Angel's head shot up he saw her turn to dust. Where Darla was there now lay a human infant crying in the rain. Angel carefully gathered up the baby and with the coat Fred handed back to him he wrapped the boy up in it. As Angel stood back up Holtz walked out aiming his crossbow straight at Angel. They stared at each other for the longest time before Angel and Fred just walked right past him. Holtz watched him run down to alley to the car and whispered two words, "No Mercy."

**-DoubleMeat Palace - Sunnydale-**

Tara walked up to the counter just in time to see Buffy, "Hey, sorry I'm late."

Buffy shrugged, "Time has no meaning here."

She took her hat off and started to move towards a table while Tara follows. They take their seats and Buffy smiles, "Thanks for coming."

Tara started to sound worried, "Is it bad?"

"I was sort of hoping you could tell me."

Tara sounded a little mad, "I knew this was going to happen. What did Willow do? Did she... she hurt anyone?"

Buffy was confused but then suddenly understood, "Wha... Uh, no, no, um... Ta...Tara, this isn't about Willow. This is about me."

Tara was extremely confused, "Is something wrong?"

Buffy looked at the table, "I've been spending a lot of time with Spike lately. I found out last night that he can hurt me without his chip going off."

Tara looked scared, "Oh my god. Hi...his chip stopped working?"

Buffy got a little nervous now, "No it still works on everybody else but me." She paused for a few seconds before continuing, "I...I need to know about the spell. The one that brought me back. I'd ask Willow, but..."

Tara finally realized what the slayer was saying, "You think it's you?"

Buffy shrugged, "I don't know. I feel ... different. There are things..." She seemed like she was about to confess something but tara looks her in the eyes and she chickens out. I...I think maybe I came back wrong."

Tara spoke in a firm voice, "No, Buffy, that's not...NO. You didn't."

Buffy was thankful for her persuasiveness but was still set on the fact something was wrong with her, "Can you check out the spell? Just see if there's something that ... Could you just check? Please?"

**-Summer's House - Later-**

Buffy sat on the coffee table facing Tara, "Are you sure?"

Tara smiled, "I've double checked everything. There's nothing wrong with you."

"Then why can Spike hurt me?"

Tara went into explanation mode, "Well, I said that there was nothing wrong with you, but ... you are different. Shifting you out of ... f-f-from where you were ... funneling your essence back into your body ... i-it, it altered you on a basic molecular level. Probably just enough to confuse the sensors or whatever in Spike's chip. But it's all just surfacey physical stuff. It wouldn't have any more effect than ... a bad sunburn."

Buffy couldn't believe it, "You must have missed something. Will you check again?"

Tara looked concerned now, "Buffy, I-I promise, there's nothing wrong with you."

"There has to be! This can't be me, it isn't me." She started to cry a little bit, "Why do I feel like a part of me is missing? I left a part of me in that grave... The only time I feel anything at all is when I'm with Spike."

Tara was really trying to understand, "What could you have left behind?"

Buffy's teary eyes stared into Tara's worried ones, "When I died I met Angel's son. The last words I told him were that I'd be there when he got back, that I would never leave him, that he could trust me and then I dissappeared. God I'm so lost without him."

Tara was submerged in guilt once more for bringing Buffy back, "Well maybe that's why you fele better around Spike." Buffy stared at her completely confused and she explained, "If it's Angel's son then Spike would technically be related to him would he not. Spike is like your safety blanket."

Buffy realized it and started shaking her head, "I should of tried so much harder to stay." She was crying even more now, "Why did I let them make me leave?"

Tara had no idea what to do and it didn't help she was still confused. How did Angel have a son and why was he in heaven with Buffy? "It's okay Buffy...I...It's not your fault. It's ours. You couldn't help anything."

Buffy shook her head, "It was my fault. Please don't forgive me, please..." She slid off the table and onto the floor kneeling in front of Tara and resting her head in Tara's lap. Tara puts her hands on Buffy's head and starts to try and calm her down. "Please don't forgive me. I deserve to feel this way..."

Tara stroked her hair, "Shh Buffy..."

Buffy's words were a little muffled by sobs, "Why did I have to leave him?" Tara had no idea what to do as she continued to pet buffy's head and whispered calming words.

**-Buffy's Room - A While Later-**

Tara eventually lead Buffy to her room and when she fell asleep tara left. Spike was a little worried when she hadn't gone by his place so he was now climbing through her window. He noticed instantly the tear streaks on her face and cursed the world once more. He sat in a chair beside the bed and atched her sleep.

Buffy of course noticed and spoke with her eyes still closed, "Conner was born today you know?" Spike understood instantly. "I was talking to Tara about me coming back wrong but then I started to feel it, i could feel him coming into this world. I just couldn't help it."

Spike jumped up instantly, "Then screw what the Whistler guy said. Let's go see the boy."

Buffy opened her eyes, "No. It's not time. It just hurts that I can't. I'm positive Angel will call me soon anyway."

Spike sat down on the side of the bed again, "Good. Now are you in a patrol mood or mope mood?"

Buffy smiled and sat up, "You know me better then that." Then they both grabbed what they needed for a late patrol knowing Buffy wouldn't sleep a wink that night.


	14. Feel it More Now That You're Gone

**-Hyperion - A Week Or Two Later-**

Things had defenitely been hectic in L.A. since the baby's birth. Everyone part of the demon world was after him, Holtz especially. Angel had handled it though and enjoyed actually having the chance to be a dad. During the last little while Angel and Cordy were even closer until Groo came back, Gunn and Fred had got together, Wesley had gotten even further on the prophecy about Conner and Now Cordy and Groo were on a vacation. The sad part is Wes had interpreted the prophecy to mean that the father would kill the son. After talking to a contact Wesley had determined that if it was going to happen it would be soon. He went to Holtz and made a deal he already regretted. Right now he was walking into the hyperion to get Conner.

He heard Conner fussing in the bassinet and looked down at him for a moment before going to retrieve Conner's diaper bag and stuff a few things into it. Lorne suddenly came down the stairs with a bottle in hand, "What are you doing?"

Wes looked up to see Lorne, "Hi. I'm taking Conner."

"Where?"

Wes continued to pack the bag, "To my place for the night. We're going to the park in the morning. I talked to Angel before. He knows all about it. Are Fred and Gunn..."

Lorner interrupted, "Out. Getting food. Boy, that girl can put away the chow! Oh, here. I heated up a bottle. Hey, Angel didn't say anything about... Well, he probably forgot. He went off in kind of a hurry."

"What happened?"

Lorne explained, "Well, he was acting kind of weird this morning. I'm sure you noticed." Wes moved to pick Conner up as Lorne continued, "Then when he came back from killing the Wraith-ers..."

Wesley was pretty much ignoring him as he tried to calm Conner down, "Hey, it's okay. It's your Uncle Wes. You like your Uncle Wes. We're gonna have a great time."

He started to bounce Connor in his arms and eventually started to hum a little. He looked up to see Lorne staring at him with wide eyes and stopped humming instantly. Slowly Wesley put Conner back down and and suddenly launched himself at Lorne. Lorne ran from him and into Wes' office but he eventually went down when Wes tackled him. Lorne struggled back up, and in the scuffle ended up tipping over Wes' desk. Wes scrambled after him and hit Lorne across the face a couple times. He then picked up a statue from the cabinet behind his desk and knocked Lorne out with it.

Wes hurried back to the bassinet to pick up Connor, "Here. All right. That's a boy. That's a boy."

Wes turned with Connor against his shoulder only to find himself face to face with Angel, "Angel."

Angel looked around, "Where is everybody?"

Wesley answered as calmly as possible, "Fred and Gunn went for food. Lorne had to go out. I'm watching the baby. In fact, I packed up some overnight things. We talked about me taking Connor to the park and the one across from my place is... It's always full of kids. I thought he could spend the night with me."

They just stood there looking at each other silently for a moment until Angel finally answered, "That's probably a really good idea." Wes let out a breath of relief, "...for now."

**-Outside Wesley's Apartment - Later That Night-**

Wes walked out of his apartment building carrying Connor and a suitcase. He pushed a button on his key chain and one of the cars by the curb chirped as it unlocked. He loaded the suitcase into the back. As he opened the side door he heard a moaning sound and turned to see a woman, arms wrapped around her middle, stumbling towards him through the park across the street.

Still holding Connor with his left arm, he pulled a gun with his right and aims it at Justine, "That's close enough." Justine stumbled to her knees and looked up at Wes through her disordered hair, crying, "Justine?"

"He's everything you said. It's true."

Wes slowly lowered his gun and stepped closer, "What happened?"

Justine said something about Holtz attacking everyone and breaking his part of the deal. In the midst of her rant she fell against Wes and he was entranced with her story, "You have to get to hospital."

Justine shook her head, "No."

Then she mumbled something else before she pulled out a knife and sliced the side of Wesley's neck. Wes fell to his knees, pressing one hand over the cut, as Justine pulled the baby out of his grip. Wes watched Justine run to the car, put Connor in the passenger side then get into the driver's side, before he toppled over onto his side. Blood seeped through between his fingers as he lay there, watching her drive off.

**-Sunnydale - Same Time as Conner Dissappeared in L.A.-**

In Sunnydale Buffy had been framed for a murder, made invisible, visited by her old boyfriend Riley and his wife, and locked in her own house on her birthday with a vicious demon. Dawn had been labeled a cleptomaniac by her friends and family when Buffy and Anya found her stash. There was nothing like her sister turning into a thief that could make Buffy feel worse then she still did. What was even worse was the fact everyday she sat by the phone in her spare time hoping Angel would call her. She hadn't heard a word since her Conner had been born. Something was either wrong or the last time she saw Angel was really a goodbye. Eaither way she thought he could of at least let her know something. She couldn't think about that today though.

There would be nothing wrong with today, nothing bad or demony could happen because it was Xander and Anya's wedding day. Buffy was her maid of honor while Tara and Dawn were brides maids. Willow was Xander's best man, a person from the family was another groomsmen and Spike by default the last groomsmen. Although it wasn't because of demons the wedding was becoming more of a war. Xander's family was always dissappointed or arguing while Anya's part was all demons. Everyone had a laugh at Spike in a tux, they didn't know wheather to laugh or cry at Anya when she walked down the aisle because of her dress and for one day everyone but Buffy was happy.

The family member walked Dawn down the aisle, Willow walked tara down the aisle and SPike walked Buffy. They said their own vowes and Xander was close to losing the rings but didn't. Buffy admired them and wondered instantly if she would ever have her own wedding. Even though she was walked down the aisle by Spike it made her feel complete for a few seconds, until she saw Anya in the white dress. The ceremony was beautiful and the reception at the Summer's house was almost a disaster but it managed to be okay. Xander and Anya left for their honeymoon, the guests went home or to hotels, everyone went to sleep and Buffy let Spike crash on the couch. When Buffy laid down to sleep she dreamt of her wedding with the one man she always dreamt it would be with, Angel.

**-L.A. Road-**

Wolfram And Hart, Sahjhan, holtz, Justine and Angel stood, having a big arguement over Conner. Holtz had him now but that was going to change. Sahjhan whispered some words and a big explosion with bright sparks cause a hole to open in the air. Past the burning edges was a turbulent blood red sky.

Sahjhan explained his magic, "What you are looking into is the Quortoth, the darkest of the dark worlds. So I can widen the portal and you can all be swallowed up by a world you can not begin to imagine or you can keep your word and kill that child." he looked at Lilah, "Now."

When no one moved he spreads his arms, "Don't say I didn't warn you."

The opening in the air grew bigger and Lilah screamed, "Kill it."

Angel of course creamed his opposition, "NO!"

The commandos and Angel stood there with the weapons aimed at each other. Holtz grabbed a hold of Justine and pushed her away from him and then headed for the portal. Angel dropped the gun and charged after him. Justine and Angel pleaded for Holtz not to do what he was planning. Holtz ignored and jumped into the red air, dissappearing from view. Angel jumped after them but was thrown back by a lightning bolt lashing out from the portal. He rolled to look back at the portal and saw no evidence of his son or Holtz.

Sahjan was happy with the outcome and closed the portal. He wished a good summer and then dissappeared. Both Justine and Angel lay on the ground staring at the portal. Lilah looked down at Angel, who hadn't moved, "Hmph! Well, I'm looking at a mountain of paperwork."

As Lilah turned to go Justine hopped up and took off in Wesley's car. The commander of commandos turned to Lilah, "Should we do something about..."

Lilah interrupted and looked at Angel on the ground, "Yes, we should. We should let him suffer."

Angel rolled over onto all fours and looked around him. He saw Justine drive off in Wes' car and then collapssed back onto the ground, once again facing twords where the portal used to be, "Connor."

**-Hospital In L.A.-**

Angel walked into Wes' hospital room. There were x-rays of his throat hanging on the wall. Wes, had an IV in the back of his left hand and a bandage around his throat. He was lying on the bed with his eyes closed and a heart monitor beeping in the background.

Angel closed the door and walked over to the bed as Wes' eyes blink open. "Hey, Wes. I just... I want you to know I understand why you did it. I know about the prophecies and I know how hard it must have been for you to do what you did. You thought I was gonna turn evil and kill my son. I didn't. It's important you know that. This isn't Angelus talking. It's me, Angel. You know that, right?" Wes blinked his eyes once. "Good."

Angel suddenly pulled the pillow out from under Wes' head and pushed it down on Wes' face. "You son of a bitch, you're gonna pay for what you did! You took my son! You son of a bitch! You bastard!" Gunn and Fred's heads jerked up out in the waiting room as a heart monitor alarm went off and orderlies run past them to reach Wes' room. "You think I'd forgive you! No! Never! You're gonna die! You hear me? You're gonna pay!" Wes' hands fumbled over Angel's arms and shoulders. The first orderly ran in and pulled Angel and the pillow off Wes for a moment. Angel shrugged him off and pushed the pillow back down on Wes' face. "You took my son! You took my son!"

Fred and Gunn ran in now and Fred panicked, "Stop it!"

Angel ignored, "You took my son!"

Two more orderlies and Gunn grabbed a hold of Angel and pulled him off Wesley. Gunn looked Angel in the eye, "Angel! Stop!"

"Never! Never! I'll kill him! You're dead!" The orderlies and Gunn wrestled Angel backwards out of the room. "Angel, stop, man." Wes lay on his bed, gasping for breath as each word took impact on him, "You're dead! You're a dead man, Pryce! You're dead! I'll kill you! I'll kill you. You're a dead man! Dead! DEAD!"

**-Sunnydale-**

When Xander and Anya came back they were instantly thrown into research. Buffy had been made to think she was in a psychiatric hospital. She almost killed her friends while her friends almost lost her once more. Her mother ended up giving her the strength to come back and drink the antidote. This was a sign that the little group of nerds that had been haunting her were starting to get more serious. More evidence of this would be the cameras in her the Summer's home and magic box that were found. Buffy still thought of them as annoying and not really a threat so she continued to work on her own problems. Angel still hadn't called and anger was working her way through her system. So when the nerd trio tried to rob the banks Buffy took comfort in smashing the extra strength balls Warren had and putting all three of them in Jail. When she got home from that she noticed Willow and tara were back together, Xander and Anya were all happy and Dawn was waiting for her. Even as she watched her family happy she still felt so completely alone.


	15. Vengence

_**A/N -** This whole chapter but the last two parts is pretty much to the script, I just needed to get to the part where Angel is put under water. It is not one of my better ones but as I said it gets the point accross_

**-Hyperion - Later-**

Cordelia and Groo had come back from vacation, Angel had done some drastic things to try and get Conner back, Gunn almost lost his soul and Lilah had offered him a chance at W&H. Right now everyone was discussing what to do about the up-coming destroyer around the pentagram which was a part of the drastic measures. Suddenly the air above the pentagram crackled with static lightning and an ugly, horned monster dropped through, followed almost immediately by a teenaged boy. The boy sliced the demon's head off in one smooth motion and its decapitated body fell to the ground. Angel stood immobile, staring as the boy aimed a three-chambered, wrist-mounted stake-launcher at him.

The boy sarcastically smiled, "Hi, dad."

Gunn ran for the weapons cabinet, Groo moved to the side to get a clear shot at Connor, swinging his ax while Angel turned towards them, holding out a hand, "Wait!" Connor launched two stakes at Angel in quick succession as Angel turned back to face him. "No."

Angel turned as the stakes travel through the air, aimed at his heart. The first one almost gt is shoulder but he turned with it and hit the second one aside. Even as the stakes flew towards Angel, Groo's ax flew through the air at Connor, who deflected his ax with the same motion Angel used. Both Angel and Conner straighten back up and resume their former positions staring at each other, Connor with the stake-launcher once again aimed at Angel, as the last of the stakes clatters to the floor.

He smiled once more, "Interesting."

Angel couldn't believe it, "My god... It's you. Connor."

Connor launched three more stakes at Angel, who ducked and rolled to avoid them. Cordy tossed her sword, and Angel caught it out of the air as he rolled back to his feet. Connor tossed the stake launcher aside and swiped at Angel with the blade in his left hand. Angel parried the blow on his sword while Conner did a one-handed cartwheel, then flipped up, kicking both Gunn and Groo in the chest in quick succession before landing on his feet in front of the counter.

Angel again tried for attention, "Will you just stop for..." Conner ignored and spun back to swipe at Angel. Angel spun around so that for a moment the two fo them were back to back. "Can't we just talk about this?"

Connor elbowed Angel in the back, dropping him face first on the floor and grabbed a hold of one of Angel's ankles before he sent him sliding across the floor between his own spread legs. As he slid, Angel turned onto his back and caught the down swing of Connor's blade on his sword. Angel kicked both feet up into Connor's face which sent him flying into a backward flip. Connor landed flat on his back, but did a quick kip-up back to his feet. Gunn and Groo were also back on their feet, and together with Angel fromed a triangle around Connor as they all shift positions.

Groo swiped at Connor and got knocked back into the stairs. Connor turned and parried the swing Gunn aimed at him then spun out of it into a punch at Angel, back around to punch at Gunn. He kept spinning and kicking and punching at his three opponents in turn in rapid succession.

The fight continues until Angel finally got the upper hand. He dropped his own sword and straddled Connor who was lying on the floor. He hit him with a hard right-cross, then forced the blade strapped to Connor's left wrist closer and closer to his own throat. The tip of the blade started to dig into Connor's throat and suddenly Angel's eyes widened. He ripped the blade from Connor's arm and tossed it behind him, then slowly backed off, staring at his son. Angel slowly offered his hand to help Connor up but Connor only squirmed back a little, then jumped to his feet and ran up the steps and out of the front doors of the Hyperion. Angel ran after him.

Connor ran out of the courtyard and into the sun where Angel had to be held back from following him. "Conner."

**-Hyperion - Later-**

Angel had eventually found Conner and saved him all in the same night. He did go back to Holtz but with the offer for him to come back to the hotel when he wanted to. He was going by steven now actually and he was standing on the stairs of the enterence to the hyperion.

Angel steps closer to Connor, "Hey."

"Hey. I thought I'd come by like you said."

Angel smiled, "I'm glad you did. Everyone, ah, this is ah, this is Steven. Steven this is Fred, Gunn, Cordelia, and that's Lorne." He turned to face his friends, "So, are we about done here?"

Fred nodded, "Oh! Yeah. I... I think we've covered everything. We should do a perimeter search then recalibrate for some wider areas."

Angel agreed before fred and Gunn leave. Lorne goes upstairs and Cordelia goes into an office leaving Angel alone with Conner. Both of them folded their arms in perfect unison while not even looking at each other and again in unison they shift from foot to foot.

Angel started conversation, "So... You hungry? We can go out."

Cordy came running out holding her head, "Angel, can you hear me? I can see her. A woman. Angel! She's all alone. She doesn't see them. Angel, you have to hurry!"

Angel knew it was a vision and waited until it calmed down. "Slow down Cordy."

Cordy looked around for a moment, "There is a woman at a bar there is a gang of vampires that are after her. You have to help her."

Angel turned to Conner, ""Listen, uhm, I ah, have to go out for a while. It's kind of my job. It could be kind of dangerous. There's a lot of killing and violence. You wanna come?" Connor stopped walking out and looked back at Angel with a half smile.

**-Conner's Hotel Room-**

Since Conner could talk he felt like he was surpressing something, something important. He always ignored because his fatherm Holtz alwas told him it was nothing or his fatherly feelings for a vampire. He knew it wasn;t true but forgot about it eventually. He spent the night with Angel fighting vampires in a bar and even let himself believe that is where he belonged. He had never been this confused, even in hell things were simple. Something about this world made him emotional and apparently Holtz saw that tonight when he followed Conner and Angel to the bar and saw them play fighting.

Right now he was trying to convince Conner of that, "It is true, son."

"You're wrong!"

Holtz tried again, "I'm not wrong. Anyone who saw you together would realize that's where you're meant to be at his side."

"No!"

"It was your need for him that drove you across the dimension."

Conner resisted, "I don't need him!"

"Go back to him, Steven."

Conner pleaded, "Why are you doing this? Why? God gave me to you."

Holtz agreed, "Yes. It was god's plan for us to be together. Nothing will ever persuade me otherwise. But now it's time for me to give you back."

"He's a demon."

"And you're the bastard son of two demons."

Conner got mad, "Then I'm a demon."

Holtz disagreed, "You're not. God help me, I don't know what you are, but I'm not the one to give you answers, and there are answers. Go and find them out." With that Conner took off out the door...

**-Hyperion - Later-**

Conner hadn't noticed Gunn and Fred watching him leave so he also didn't know that they knew where Holtz was now. Conner walked in and noticed Cordy and the demon Lorne he was introduced to earlier. Cordy stared at him while yelling upstairs, "Angel, you might want to come downstairs."

Conner looked around, "Very nice." Angel appeared at the railing, "Hi."

Angel sees it's Conner and hopped down to the lobby. "What are you doing here?"

Conner shrugged, "I should go."

Angel stopped him, "Don't. It doesn't seem like it now but this could be home for you."

**-Outside of Holtz's Hotel Room-**

Justine slammed Holtz up against the side wall of the motel, "Don't make me do it. I can't."

Holtz had his hand wrapped around Justine's right hand and the awl she is holding up between them.Holtz was trying to convince her to do something, "We already know you can. You promised. You said you'd do anything for me. Come on, Justine. I'm not asking you to follow me into hell. Just help send me there. Do it!"

A crying Justine quickly stabbed him in the side of the neck with the awl. Holtz slid down the wall, still holding on to Justine, "Again, again."

Conner showed up from his distraction just in time to see Justine's crying body laying over Holtz's lifeless one. Conner glared at the two marks on the neck and almost groled his next word, "Angelus!"

Justine stood and patted Conner's shoulder, "I'm sorry but we need to talk."

"LEAVE!"

Justine pushed, "Angelus won. He could have just walked away."

"He'll pay."

"I'll help you kill him."

"No."

Justine realized where he was going with this, "You don't wanna kill him? After what he did? What do you wanna do?"

Conner turns to look into her eyes, "Vengence."

**-Hyperion-**

Conner and Justine took care of Holtz and discussed their plan. Angel and Cordy talked ot Lorne before he left, Gunn and Fred ran in to tell Angel they let Conner leave but then Conner showed up like nothing happened. He said he went for a walk. Lorne came in for one last goodbye when Cordy went home. Lorne tried to convince Angel that he loved Cordelia but then something clicked in Angel's head and he finally remembered Buffy. Angel looked behind him and stared at Conner, remembering Buffy's warning of a reward. Regret filled him for not calling her or meeting with her. He started to wonder how she knew but it was put in the back of his mind as Lorne continued to tell him that he was in love with Cordy. The truth was he wasn't. He couldn't live without her but it was nothing like the feelings he had for Buffy. He did know that he had to talk to Cordy about going to Sunnydale. Everyone said bye to Lorne and then went to a movie.

At Cordy's place Groo tried to convince Cordy that she was in love with Angel but she wouldn' let herself believe it. She promised Groo more devotion and alone time and that she would talk to Angel. Groo decided to stay but Cordelia knew she would have to talk to Angel about this. It could wait though until after her night with Groo.

**-After the movies - Hyperion-**

They were just getting in when Cordy phoned. Angel picked up and both agreed to meet at a pier by the beach. He hung up and told the group. Conner sighed, "I don't know if I like her. I don't know what it is, just something says I shouldn't."

Angel thought about it and thought he would talk about it when he got back. When he walked out the door Conner glared at his back...

**-Pier-**

Angel's cell rang, "Cordy?"

Cordelia answered, "Yeah, I'm running a little late. Stupid L.A. traffic."

Angel shrugged, "Okay."

"I'll see you in a bit."

Angel hung up the phone and stared out at the water. instantly he was again reminded of Buffy and knew the sooner he got to talk to her the better because if she knew about Conner then she would probably be expecting a call or something. To his surprise Conner showe dup and interrupted his thoughts by throwing him off the cliff. They wrestled but Conner wouldn't explain his violent outburst. In the fight Connor slugged him across the face with the tazer. Angel dropped to his knees, and Connor kept zapping him until Angel lay face down in the water, no longer moving. Conner pulleed a flashlight from his back pocket and turned it on so he could use it to signal a bote off shore. The boat flashed a light in response and Justine who was teering the boat moved in closer to shore.

**-Later-**

Angel awoke to the sound of a screw-gun. He was lying on his back inside a metal casket. Connor was tightening the screws on it. Thick steel cables were wrapped over Angel's ankles, thighs, abdomen and chest, confining his arms at his sides and holding him motionless.

He was the most confused at this moment also, "Connor. - Why are you doing this?"

"You murdered my father."

Angel denied it, "No. I didn't. I swear."

Justine's voice rang out, "He's lying."

Angel now understood, "I'm not lying. And she knows it."

Conner didn't believe him, "You're the prince of lies."

"That's why you wouldn't let them kill me at the drive-in. So you could."

Conner smiled, "Killing is to good for you. You don't get to die. You get to live... forever."

"Some day you'll learn the truth and you'll hate yourself. Don't. It's not your fault. I don't blame you."

"Liar!"

Angel tried to change his mind, "Listen to me. I love you! Never forget that." Conner and Justine go to pick up the lid of the coffin. "Connor! Connor, never forget that I'm your father and that I love you."

They lower the lid into place which cut off Angel's pleads. Conner looked down through the wire-mesh glass window at Angel's face, then he and Justine slid the two rods that lock the lid in place into their channels, and Justine welded them into place, while Conner kept looking at Angel. When Justine finished they moved to one end of the coffin and pushed it off the back of the boat. Conner and Justine watch as the casket floated for a moment, then one end dipped down the and finally the casket sunk leaving behind a small trail of bubbles. Connor looked over at Justine, then back at the spot where the casket went down. The engine of the boat reved up while Conner stayed at the stern, watching, as the boat pulled away into the night.

**-Summer's house - Buffy's Room-**

Buffy was tossing and turning in her sleep until she heard a thud and woke up breathing and panting hard. It was only a dream, just a dream. She kept reassuring herself that Angel was safe and it was just a dream.


	16. Buffy Saved MeAgain

**-Summer's House - Buffy's Room - 2 Months Later-**

After Buffy had put the dorks behind bars everything had been slow and happy with the exception of Buffy as usual. Every night for almost nine weeks now she'd have a dream with Angel under water, or Conner killing Angel, and even Angel and Conner fighting on a beach. Sometimes Wesley would be in them and sometimes a girl she didn't even know would be helping Conner. She didn't know what they meant or why she was having them or even if they meant anything. She hadn't told anyone until right now, because she figured telling Spike would mean something but she was wrong. Spike just sat there in silence after hearing about her dreams and stuff.

Buffy sighed, "You don't know what to say or do either huh?"

Spike shrugged, "What can I say slayer? It's either you and your fear of Conner hating Angel or something's actually wrong."

A voice echoed the room from a dark corner, "I'm going with option B."

Spike stood up, "Who the hell are you?"

Buffy smiled and shook her head at Spike, "Don't worry Spike, he's an old friend."

Whistler stepped out from the shadows, "How you doing slayer?"

Spike looked at buffy, "Spike this is Whistler." She turned to Whistler, "I'm tired and I'm guessing you're the man with my answers."

Whistler nodded, "The powers thought you would have followed your dreams by now to L.A. Your Angel got himself in a heap of trouble."

Buffy looked worried, "What...Is something wrong?"

Whistler nodded, "Yeah. He found himself underwater."

Buffy shook her head and remembered her dreams, "How long?"

"Since your dreams started. Now he can be helped without you buffy, he's not your mission."

Buffy remembered her dream about the fight with Conner, "Why would Conner bury Angel at the bottom of the ocean. My Conner wouldn't do something like that."

Whistler thought about it, "There's a long story that will only be told to you in L.A. You only need to know that Conner needs your help Buffy, a lot of help."

Buffy nodded, "How could he need a lot of help, how could he bury his dad at the bottom of an ocean? He's only like 3 or 4 months by now."

Whistler avoided her eye contact, "It's part of the story Buffy. That's all I can tell you, I'll see you in L.A."

Buffy waved, "Thanks a bunch as always."

Whistler smiled and dissappeared once again. Spike was completely confused, "What?"

Buffy laid back on her bed, "Looks like I'm going to L.A."

Spike stared at buffy, "You said that if Conner sees you he'll remember everything, just like you do."

Buffy actually smiled, "I hope he does."

Spike grabbed her hand, "Even if he does, it means you will eventually leave again Buffy."

Buffy thought about it but then took her hand away, "We'll deal with that when it comes. Right now we're packing."

Spike stood up, "I'll just tell Dawnie she's missing the first day of school then."

Buffy smacked her head, "Right." She thought for a few seconds, "I'll leave her with Xander and Anya. You, Willow and Tara can come with me to L.A."

Spike sighed, "Fine don't ask me or anything."

Buffy smiled, "Come on,it's not like you had plans." She picked up a bag from under the bed, "Now let's pack for a few days."

**-L.A. - Underwater-**

Angel had lost count of how many days and nights had gone by. It was the closest he ever got to sunlight without burning up though and it only made him more jealous and more excluded from the world. The whole time he was down their dreams, hallucinations and thoughts filled his time. The thought on his mind now was how he had left things with a cliffhanger. He hadn't talked to buffy, he hadn't talked to Cordy, his friends don't know anything and especially Conner. He had never loved anything more then he did Conner but what he did was absolutely unbelievable. He would dream every night of how he could of changed the outcome or won the fight.

The dreams were odd though because when he replayed the event over and over Buffy would be sitting on the cliff watching without doing a thing. She would sit there emotionless until Conner had him in the casket or until Angel took him down. Despite the confusion, anger, dissappointment and loneliness, there was only one more feeling Angel was worried about. HUNGER! Every fish he saw made him drool, every memory of him being evil made his blood pump faster and even his own blood got him a little riled up. It wouldn't be long now, maybe a day or two until he couldn't take it anymore. He hoped with everything inside of him one of his friends would find him.

**-Hyperion-**

Cordy had gone to meet Angel that night and was late as she had told him. When she got there the beach was completely empty obviously. She panicked because she knew he was already there when he phoned. She phoned his cell phone and followed the ring tone down to the sand. She then drove all the way back to the Hyperion. The whole time Conner watched her and even on foot beet her back to the hotel. She told everyone she couldn't find Angel and Conner especially acted curious, worried and scared. He had been like that through-out the whole two months, never letting on once that he was the one who put their beloved Angel underwater to suffer. Right now Cordy, Groo, Gunn, fred and Conner were discussing the new lead they were using to find Angel. Wesley on the other hand was doing Lilah. What an eventful summer...

**-In the middle of Sunnydale And L.A.-**

Spike drove Xander's car, Buffy occupied passenger seat while Willow and Tara slept in the back. They had left at about 10 that night so the witches were a little tired. Xander and Anya were dissappointed in the late night call but gladly accepted to stay at the Summer's house with Dawn until Buffy got back. Since things weren't that rough in Sunnydale Buffy thought it would be okay for a while. Right now she was anxious and fidgetting a lot.

Spike sighed, "Only a few more minutes pet."

Buffy nodded, "You ready to swim?" Spike looked confused and she smiled, "Well I can't very well find that casket all by myself, plus you don't need to breath."

Spike cursed this trip, "You could of told me that before."

"It's more fun this way." They both smiled and enjoyed the tension breaker, even though it wouldn't be this way for long.

**-The Beach Where Angel Is-**

When they got ot the beach Buffy couldn't help but recognize it as the beach from her dreams. She looked up at a cliff which sent a memory flash through her of the dream she had when Conner pushed Angel off a cliff. She was torn out of her thoughts when Spike grabbed her arm and pointed to the water, "Time to be fish pet."

Willow walked up to Buffy, "Tara's going to drive the boat."

Buffy nodded and looked around, "What boat?" Spike actually smiled as he noticed one by a small little wooden pier. When Buffy noticed she sighed, "We're returning it when we're done."

Everyone walked towards it and hopped in. Tara immediately started the boat and it wasn't long before they were on the water. Spike and Buffy checked out the boat and noticed it had a hoist which was going to be used to pull Angel up. When they were out on the water Buffy stood at the edge of the boat and closed her eyes as the wind blew through her hair. It wasn't long before she started to get goosebumps and smile.

**-Underwater-**

Angel could see the boat above him, but it was only another false hope for him. Well he thought that until his stomach did flip flops, awkward Goosebumps formed and an actual smile spread on his face because he knew, he knew the only woman that meant more to him then the world was directly above him.

**-Boat-**

Buffy's eyes shot open and she looked down before yelling, "Stop."

Willow yelled back, "Why? There's nothing on the monitor."

Buffy sighed, "Willow, he's here. I know."

Spike hesitantly backed her up, "Red, tell the other witch to stop the boat. Slayer thinks we've got something and if I've learned anything since I knew her it's that her instincts are always right."

Buffy smiled at him as Willow walked back into the driving part of the boat. It wasn't long before the boat came to a stop allowing Spike and Buffy to gaze over the edge of their diving ground. Buffy looked at Willow and Tara who had appeared behind them, "I'll tug twice on the hoist if we have him."

Willow nodded, "Don't die or get sick, k?"

Buffy smiled and looked at Spike, "Ready."

Spike shrugged, "Benn a while since I've been swimming."

Buffy winked before jumping in. Spike quickly followed and it wasn't even seconds before both were completely submerged. Buffy was ready to go back up for air when her flashlight caught something and she instinctively swam for the light illuminated object. She forgot about her need to breath when her eyes met the broken ones of her Angel. His cracked and pale face almost killed her but she stayed calm as possible and hooked the hoist onto the casket. Spike tugged on it twice before it started to move up. Angel didn't know what was happening or why Buffy wasn't in front of him anymore. Was it an illusion? Another fantasy? He knew it was real when the casket was out of water and for the first time all summer Angel could see the moon clearly. He wondered though where Buffy was now and why Willow was standing over him.

Buffy and Spike swam after the casket and the second Buffy was out of water she took a giant breath. Spike sighed, "God I wish I knew what it was like to breath."

Buffy ignored him and hopped out of the water with the casket. Spike followed suit and soon all four of them were standing around the casket. Buffy wasted no time in grabbing the blowtorch she had found earlier and started to burn through the welds securing the sidebars. The side bars came off and Buffy and SPike both lifted the lid. Buffy cut the steel cord that held Angel immobile and he instantly grabbed Buffy's arm just to make sure she was real. Buffy smiled at his shock stricken face and put his arm back to his chest.

She was torn out of staring at her Angel when Spike spoke, "He needs to feed Buffy."

Buffy nodded, looked around and came back to Spike. She shrugged, "Well it's your blood or mine."

Spike shrugged, "It's not like I haven't fed him before."

Buffy smiled, "So have I."

Spike agreed, "And it almost killed you."

"But it didn't." Buffy sighed, "Either way Spike my blood is stronger then yours, plus it'll give you a reason to hit him if he takes too much."

Spike reluctantly agreed and tossed her a knife. Buffy slowly slit her upper arm and lent in close to Angel. Despite his feelings, nine weeks of hunger was too much to resist when you have slayer's blood dripping in front of you. His face transformed and he began to devour every drop as Willow turned to look away.

Spike looked at Tara, "Why don't you get us back to land?"

Tara nodded and the witches went back into the cabin. Spike watched intently and a little hungry at the sight before him but did nothing until Buffy started to get a little wobbly. Angel was using his hands now and gripped Buffy's arm to his mouth. When Buffy closed her eyes and almost fell Spike couldn't help but stop it. With a harsh push Angel's mouth was detached from buffy's arm and Buffy fell to the ground. Spike went ot make sure she was okay and noticed her blinking.

He sighed in relief, "Good."

Buffy took a deep breath, "He awake."

Spike looked into the casket and saw Angel staring at him with wide eyes now back in human face. Just as soon as it started the blood letting was over. He glanced back at buffy, "He's up."

Buffy struggled to stand but when she did with Spike's help she lent on the edge of the casket. She smiled at Angel and grabbed his hand. Angel only half smiled back and gripped her hands a little harder before whispering two words, "I'm sorry."

Buffy shook her head and let a single tear fall. She got herself together before looking at Spike, "Can you get me some bandages, I'm sure we brought some."

Spike nodded and left. Buffy smiled back at Angel, "So uh...Real eventful summer huh?"

Angel stuttered, "Y...You should o...of been h...here."

Buffy kissed his hands, "Oh god, I wish I was."

"We're g...going to have o...one of our t...talks a...again aren't w...we?"

Buffy shrugged, "Most likely with how screwed up things are."

Angel didn't respond because the boat jolted when they hit land. Angel gripped Buffy still tired, weak and confused. Spike came back out with buffy's bag, "We'll play doctor later luv, we've got company on shore."

Buffy nodded, "Uh...Put the stuff in the car, I'll carry him and then..."

Angel interrupted, "I..I can walk."

Buffy looked at him and then at Spike, "I'll just help him."

Spike nodded, "Then we'll deal with the ex-watcher."

Angel's anger perked up at the ex-watcher part. Buffy looked at Angel and noticed, "So something defenitely happened with Wesley." She looked back at Spike, "Take Angel back to the car, I'll deal with Wesley." Angel tried to interrupt but Buffy shook her head, "I don't even need to know what he did Angel, I'll handle Wesley and you go back to the car. It'll get you home faster."

Spike grabbed Angel a little more violently then he had to which made Angel glare and a little confused. He went along with it though and watched as Buffy got smaller the more they walked away. Buffy watched them until they were in the car and then turned to face Wesley and a woman walking towards the little wooden bridge. She sighed knowing drama was soon going to follow.


	17. Time To Face The Music

**-Beach-**

Buffy stopped staring at Wesley and the woman after a little while before finally running towards them. She recognized the woman as the one in her dreams and was shocked to see Wesley with her. That changed when Wesley threw her on the bridge and Buffy knew they weren't there as friends. Buffy managed to sneak up behind them as Wesley made it to the wooden bridge.

Buffy watched him look for the boat until she couldn't take it anymore, "The boat might be a little closer then you think. We borrowed it a little earlier."

Wesley's head shot around only to smile at the glowing Buffy, "Bu...Buffy."

Buffy smiled and walked up to hug him. He accepted gracefully and when they parted Buffy motioned towards Justine, "Who's the girl?"

Wesley sighed not knowing where to start, "Well she did something...Angel's in a little bit of...Justine is my prisoner and she's going to..."

Buffy interrupted, "We found Angel, he's in the car."

Wesley didn't know wheather to be dissappointed or to smile, "That's great."

Buffy kept explaining, "I knew he was in trouble and I have to see someone in L.A. anyway. I know you were going to find him so I'm sorry I got there first."

Wesley shrugged, "The world needs him."

Buffy broke through his cold facade and walked a little closer towards him, "You're not fooling anyone Wesley. You wanted to save him so he might forgive whatever horrible thing you did to him. I don't know what it is but I know it'll all work out. If it wasn't meant to work out then I wouldn't be here."

Wesley half smiled, "Thanks."

Buffy turned towards Justine and walked towards the woman who was staring her in the eyes, "She the one who put him in there?"

Wesley nodded, "One of them." Buffy smiled and without warning punched Justine in the face. Wesley smiled, "Justine, this is Buffy. The one slayer in the whole world you shouldn't have made mad."

His words distracted Justine so Buffy was able to get a few more punches in but when the woman started blocking them buffy started her kicks. It wasn't long before the woman was on the ground bloodied and half counscious. Buffy took a deep breath and walked back to Wesley, "Sorry... she hurt Angel."

Wesley shrugged, "She slit my neck, I don't think that was enough pain for her."

Buffy nodded and realized something, "Wes, can you call Angel's house and tell them that he's safe and that we're bringing him home? Tell them about Conner and..."

Wesley interrupted, "How do you know about Conner?"

Buffy shrugged, "A long story. I know you won't go to Angel's home with us so I'll call you before I leave and we'll do the whole catch-up thing."

Wesley actually smiled his old fashioned british smile, "That will be nice."

Buffy smiled, "Alright then."

Wesley got back to business, "So you should get going and I have a phone call to make."

Buffy looked down at Justine, "You gonna leave her?"

Wesley nodded, "Hopefully some shark will eat her."

Buffy smiled and started backing away, "Thanks Wes, thanks a lot."

Wes nodded and started walking the other way towards his car. Buffy started running and in no time she was in the back seat with Angel on top of her. Spike sighed, "Angel's hotel it is."

Buffy smiled up at him, "You have a hotel?"

Angel wasn't smiling though as he whispered back to Buffy, "You're in for a few more surprises then that." That left Buffy silent and thinking about his statement all the way to the hotel.

**-Hyperion - Lobby-**

Cordelia hung up the phone and stared in front of her at Gunn and Fred. She stayed silent for a few minutes before speaking, "It was Conner, the whole time he was here was a facade." At the confused faces before her she explained, "That was Wesley. Angel's on his way home and he said that it was Conner and Justine that locked him in a casket at the bottom of the ocean."

Fred took a high pitched deep breath as Gunn silently cursed the world. Fred looked up at Cordy, "So what do we do about Conner? He's upstairs moping and mad."

Gunn spoke up instantly, "I say we charge the kid."

Cordy shook her head and expressed her already formed plan, "I say we send someone up and make him think everything is okay. When he's better that person knocks him out."

Gunn nodded, "Good, but who?"

Cordy looked at Fred, "You should go. He thinks you're the most vulnerable one."

Fred looked around, "W... I can't knock him out."

Cordy smiled, "We'll give you a taser."

Fred looked nervous until she sighed, "I guess I can do it."

"Good!"

**-Conner's Room-**

Conner lay stretched out on his bed playing with a handheld video game. A knock interrupted him, "What?"

Fred stood in the open doorway holding a tray of sandwiches and milk, "Brought you a snack."

"I'm not hungry."

Fred giggled, "You're always hungry."

Fred walked into the room and Connor lowered his game already caving, "What is it?"

"Bologna."

"No tomatoes?"

Fred confirmed, "No tomatoes."

Connor sat up and reached for the tray, but Fred pulled it back, "What do you say?"

Conner looked at her, "Thank you."

Fred smiled, "Your welcome."

Connor tore into the sandwich as Fred put the tray down on the nightstand then stroked Connor's hair. Conner stopped eating for a few seconds, "Connor: "Is he still mad?"

"What so you think?"

Conner spoke in a soft tone, "Sorry."

Fred continued to try and make him feel better, "I can't imagine what you've been through, Connor, being taken away by Holtz, raised in that place. It must have been horrible. I know you're still hurting but I promise, it's not nearly as much as you're gonna hurt for what you did to your father."

Connor stopped chewing and looked up at Fred just in time for her to put a taser against his chest. She fired it and Conner fell back in pain.

**-Hyperion - Office-**

Connor sat in the office, tied to a chair with Fred, Cordy and Gunn standing over him, tazer in Fred's hand. Cordy couldn't contain herself, "You think that's what Angel felt? When you did it to him? Did he scream like you?"

Conner tried to play stupid, "Why are you doing this?"

Gunn wouldn't even let him, "Nah-ah. Don't even try it."

Fred explained, "We got a call form an old friend tonight."

Cordy added, "Wesley knew a little something that we didn't and he says Angel's on his wat home. Now I know what you're thinking, why believe the bastard? The way I see it, I trust him a whole lot more then I trust you."

Conner stayed quiet and Gunn smiled, "That's right, Sparky, Daddy's coming home. And I'm guessing there's going to be a spanking."

Cordelia continued to make him feel bad, "He's been down there, all alone, for three months and you knew! How could you do that to us?" She grabbed the taser from fred's hand and walked closer to Conner, "We took you into our home. We cared for you, and all this time... How could you do that?"

When Connor did nothing but look at her Cordy started to shake and with a quick motion she buried the taser in Conner's chest just to watch him arc back and scream. The whole time she was screaming in anger, "HOW COULD YOU DO THAT?"

Gunn and Fred pulled her back just in time for her to start crying. They lead Cordy out of the office so that Conner couldn't see them and they couldn't see him anymore. They were rubbing her back as Conner screamed out, "Go ahead. Hurt me some more, Cordy."

Cordy screamed back, "God I never thought you had the guts to be so completely heartless."

Conner shrugged. "You get used to pain being your whole life and see how it feels."

Cordelia was trying not to go in there and beet him up knowing that's exactly what he wanted her to do, "You don't feel anything, do you? There's nothing inside."

Conner shrugged, "Why don't you open me up and find out."

Fred interviened with another guilt filled question, "How could you do that to your father?"

Conner practically growled out his next words, "That thing is not my father. He got what he deserved."

Fred jumped in again, "And how soon before we deserved it?"

Conner stayed silent and the question was left open-ended because the heads in the lobby turned to see the doors open. Since Conner was tied up they didn't bother checking on him as they rushed to the aid of Buffy who was holding up Angel halfway. They ignored the surprise of the Sunnydale people being there and focusssed on sitting Angel down. Conner knew what was going on and when Buffy was giving out commands Conner knew it sounded farmiliar.

When Angel was safely on the couch Fred looked around, "Is he going to be all right?"

Angel actually answered, "I'm fine, I'm just a little weak."

Cordelia then turned to Buffy, "I should of know Buffy would find him."

Buffy smiled back, "Cordelia chase, how I missed your much un needed sarcasm and bitchiness."

Cordelia just glared and turned to face Willow, "Look at Willow now, all grown up."

Willow just smiled, "One of us had to."

Angel held up a hand, "Guys please."

Buffy was about to ask about Conner until a sound of the chair toppling over in the office rang through the hotel. Gunn, Fred, and Cordy ran for the office but Conner was waiting. He had them all down in a matter of seconds but when he moved to turn around he was face to face with Angel standing in the doorway.

Angel stared into his son's eyes, "Sit down."

Connor backed up a little never taking his eyes off Angel, "You're too weak to take me."

Angel shrugged, "You really think that?"

Connor looked at Angel for another moment before turning to pick up the chair and slamming it down on the floor. He then sat on it to face Angel while Angel then lowered himself into a chair accross from his son. Everyone started to stir as Angel sighed, "So, how was your summer? Mine was fun. Saw some fish. Went mad with hunger. Hallucinated a whole bunch."

Gunn quietly helped Fred and Cordy back to their feet as Conner answered Angel, "You deserved worse."

Angel nodded, "Because I killed Holtz...except I didn't. I tried telling you that while you were busy offshore dumping me, but I didn't know the whole score. Holtz killed himself. Actually he had your buddy Justine do it with an ice pick. Just to make you hate me."

Conner paused before responding, "Even if...you still deserved it."

Angel agreed, "What I deserve is open to debate but understand there is a difference between wishing vengeance on someone and taking it. So now the question becomes; What do you deserve?" Connor suddenly jumped up from his chair and ran for the door, but Angel intercepted him and tossed him against the wall. "Daddy's not finished talking."

Angel crouched down next to where Connor sat, scrunched up against the wall, "I figured everything out so as far as I'm concerned you deserve a real good punishment." He paused and stood up before continuing, "Get up."

Conner stood and Angel finished his speech, "What you did to me was unbelievable, Connor. but then I got stuck in a hell dimension by my girlfriend one time for a hundred years..." Some hint of farmiliarity went through Conner but he ignored it as Angel went on, "...so three months under the ocean actually gave me perspective but I did get time to think. About us, about the world. Nothing in the world is the way it ought to be. It's harsh, and cruel but that's why there's us. Champions. It doesn't matter where we come from, what we've done or suffered, or even if we make a difference. We live as though the world was what it should be, to show it what it can be. You're not a part of that yet but I hope you will be. I love you, Connor; Now get out of my house"

After looking around Conner left and Angel let out a sigh. He looked at his friends, "Hi."

They all smiled but the fact they hadn't heard the door close kind of made them curious. Angel started to wobble back into the lobby. What the L.A. gang walked in on was Buffy and Conner15 feet apart staring into each other's eyes with everyone else from Sunnydale staring at the same scene.

_**A/N -** That's right! Don't you all hate me now? The next chapter is written but I'm going to finish chapter 21 before I update again and I just finished 20. Also, I know the whole Wesley meeting didn't play like you all expected but I have plans for this. This scene wasn't dramatic because the next time Wes appears I want it to be in front of everybody just to make it more awkward and the ultimate test for Conner. Also AMAZING THANKS! You guys asked for updates in other reviews, I had no idea this story was good. Thanks a bunch everybody and I hope I don't let you down with the whole reunion._


	18. I missed You

_**A/N -** So I caved. Your reviews were more amazing then I could have thought and personally I don't think this chapter works up to your expectations but hey, If you like it you like and if you don't im sorry. I hope you enjoy and if you're emotional grab a tissue!_

**-Hyperion - Lobby - Where Chapter17 Left Off-**

Conner stared into the teary eyes of Buffy Summers and after a few seconds he fell to the floor with quick flashes of his world before birth. He wrapped his arms around his stomach before gripping his hair. Everything him and Buffy talked about or did came back to him in emotional surges. It wasn't painful but he was on his knees because of the overwhelming feeling pulsating through his body.

Angel was about to rush to him when Buffy held up a hand still staring at Conner with her desperate and loving eyes, "Wait Angel, please wait."

Angel listened as Conner finished going through his revelation. After a few minutes he did look up with tears in his eyes, "Buffy."

Buffy smiled, "Oh Conner."

Conner stood up slowly trying not to cry and trying not to let his angry exterior fade. As he looked around he noticed Buffy's friends and suddenly happiness was run over with anger. He growled at Willow, "YOU! You took her away from me."

He ran at Willow but Buffy intervened and stepped up to him, "Conner no." Willow jumped and grabbed Tara's hand tight but continued to stare as Buffy held Conner in one place, "She didn't take me away, she just helped me be a part of your life in this world."

Conner couldn't help himself and the instant Buffy touched him his eyes started to water, "I missed you so much. I was so confused...so lost."

Buffy wrapped her arms around his neck and couldn't help but cry too, "I know Conner. I love you so much. It hurt so much knowing you were in this world and I couldn't be here."

That was the boys breaking point as he just lent into Buffy's shoulder and cried like he was a baby once more. They mumbled I love you's, they drenched each others shoulders in tears and they gripped each other like there was no tomorrow or like they were making up for all the time that had been lost between them. They dropped to their knees eventually and Buffy started rocking him. She couldn't believe she had this boy in her arms again, she couldn't believe he let her hold him. Thier cries began to soften and the room became awkward for everyone to be in. Soon the boy wasn't even crying and just took comfort in the fact he was with buffy again. His eyes slowly closed and Buffy finally realized he had cried himself to sleep. Under different circumstances she could of called him peaceful.

Cordelia thought this was the best time to be herself, "What the hell is going on?"

Buffy looked up into Angel's confused eyes still trying to calm herself down. Slowly she stood holding Conner like he was a baby in her arms, "I'm bringing him to a room, I'll be down to explain soon."

Angel shook his head, "I just kicked him out."

Buffy shook her head and raised her voice a little, "No!" She calmed down a bit, "Angel. He just needs to understand this place and he's not going to do that all by himself." Angel tried to interrupt but Buffy sighed, "You don't let me bring him upstairs to a room then I will take him home with me and we'll leave right now."

Angel nodded and Buffy started moving towards the stairs. Conner gripped Buffy closer at the word leave and whispered in his partly conscious state, "Don't leave me again Buffy."

Buffy smiled, "Not if I can help it Conner."

She kissed him on top of the head and was out of everyone's sight. Angel then looked directly at Willow, "What the hell is going on?"

Willow shrugged, "I'd ask Spike, I didn't even know she knew your son until a little while ago."

Angel ignored the fact that Buffy even confided in him and glared at his grandchilde. Spike only smiled, "You're going to wait until the slayer tells you. It's a hell of a story."

**-Conner's room-**

Buffy managed to find Conner's room and lay him on the bed. She kissed his hand and watched for a few seconds. She was about to get up until Conner's eyes slowly opened, "You said you weren't going to leave."

Buffy smiled and sat back down. She got serious though, "I'm not leaving you, I'm going downstairs and..."

Conner shook his head, "You said you weren't going to leave before and you disappeared."

Buffy understood, "I didn't want to and I did everything I could to not leave but it didn't work in our favor. Remember that time I told you you get disappointed in this world?" Conner nodded, "Well that was just one of those times."

Conner grabbed Buffy's hand a little tighter, "This whole world was a dissappointment until you came back."

Buffy let one more tear fall before standing up, "I'm going to be downstairs with Angel while you sleep. It looks like you need it." Conner nodded and watched her walk out the door. For the first time in a long time that boy went to sleep happy.

**-Lobby-**

The room had stayed silent and even as Buffy made her way down the stairs no one spoke. She took the centre stage, "I think we should sit." Everyone made their way to seats as Angel and Buffy stood staring into each other's eyes. "Unless you need to eat?"

Angel stared at the covered cut on Buffy's forearm and flashed back to his animalistic memory of that night. He shook his head though, "I'm fine. I want to know what just happened."

They moved to sit accross from each other with everyone else. Fred looked around and spoke a little quietly, "I don't mean to be even more out of the loop but who are you people?"

Intros were done with Cordelia's sarcasm, Then Buffy went on to tell them about when she died, about her choice, about Whistler, about the T.V and about Conner. Right now she was dictating the end, "...so then I started coughing and glowing and by the time Conner got back I was in my coffin."

Willow and Tara avoided glances as Cordelia glared at them. Angel was absolutely stunned, "So he remembered all of this when he was born?"

Buffy shook her head, "Only I did. He didn't remember until he saw me. Whistler said it was time for him to remember."

Angel stood up, "Subconcously though, he remembered you teaching him how to fight, he remembered your advice...everything."

Buffy nodded slowly, "Yeah." Angel shook his head and suddenly Buffy felt offended. He was totally blowing this amazing revelation off as a problem yet it wouldn't of happened if he had told her or even if he had asked for help. So Buffy figured it was her turn for questions, "The only thing that confused me is he's only supossed to be like 3 or 4 months right now. Something happened and I think it's my turn for answers."

Angel agreed and sat back down knowing she was probably offended with the way he was reacting, she always was. He took a deep breath before explaining Wesley, Quortoth, Holtz, and the big soap opera when Conner came back. Buffy was dumbfounded and hurt, ""He's been through so much."

Cordelia didn't understand though, "Everybody get's hurt, it doesn't give them a reason to go around drowning people and using others."

Buffy stood up in anger, "You have no idea what it feels like to have absolutely no control over how you feel. You have no idea how it feels to always be strong. Until you do you get no insight to how he feels and how he's acting."

Before Cordy could retaliate Angel stepped in, "So what do you plan to do about it?"

Buffy stood up, "I'm going to do what I was trying to do. I'm going to teach him."

Angel stood too, "Then I'm helping you."

"Angel..."

Angel interrupted, "He's my son Buffy."

Buffy agreed, "He is Angel but he doesn't understand what that means. Please Angel, just give me some time."

That's when Spike jumped in for the first time, "Look Buffy I've been quiet and not a pain in the ass the whole trip but I think it's about time my mouth opened." Buffy just glared as he asked his question, "How much time are you talking about?"

Buffyr shrugged, "I don't know. I just have to talk to him and we'll see where things go." She turned back to Angel with desperate eyes, "Please Angel, I need to help that boy, it's my fault."

Angel stared at her and realized no one could look into those eyes and not cave. He sighed, "Fine. I take it then you'll all be staying here."

Spike stood up, "Not much for the drama club kiddies, I'll be back about sunrise."

Buffy smiled, "I know you like the back of my hand Spike, no explanation needed."

Spike walked towards the door, "We'll talk when I get back."

Buffy smiled and nodded, "Always."

Spike left leaving Angel in a jealous frenzy, wondering why Buffy would be talking to him at all. Well he wondered until a conclusion popped into his head, "You're dating Spike?"

He realized he was wrong hen tara and Willow giggled and when Buffy stuck out her tongue and shook her head. Buffy calmed down and explained, "We've just been...We understand a lot more about each other now."

Angel nodded and thanked the powers for Cordelia's interruption, "Well then, I'm going to go home to my man. I'll be back first thing in the morning for that welcome back Angel party."

She walked up to Angel and during their three minute hug Buffy avoided eye contact and got a little squirmish. When Cordy finally walked out the door Buffy calmed down and gave Angel a 'What the hell' glance. He didn't answer because Fred stood up, "We should get some sleep too, tomorrow seems like a long day."

Angel welcomed the hug Fred gave him and when they let go he smiled at Gunn, "You want to show Willow and Tara a place to sleep?"

Fred looked confused, "They sleep in the same bed?"

The girls blushed while Buffy giggled and answered for them, "Oh yeah, they've been sleeping in the same bed for about two years now."

Fred realized and smiled, "You guys are lesbians?"

Willow and tara stuttered as Gunn made it so they didn't have to answer by changing the subject, "Let's go find you a room."

Willow looked at Buffy, "We'll talk tomorrow and don't forget to call Xander and Dawn. Oh yeah, Anya needs your help with all the slayer books at the shop. She said that Giles was of no use because he left."

Buffy looked confused, "I don't read slayer books. I mean I was training really hard and reading before I died but I don't read anymore."

Willow shrugged, "Just talk to her. I'm sure the new wife happiness hasn't worn off yet and she'll be a ray of sunshine."

Buffy smiled, "Hope so. Good night."

Willow and tara followed Gunn and Fred up the stairs and soon it was only Buffy and Angel left in the lobby as it always seemed to work out. Buffy smiled at him, "Now are you hungry?"

Angel almost fell over from trying to be so strong, "Thanks."


	19. Face The Music

**-Kitchen-**

Angel lead buffy to the kitchen where she grabbed him a mug and served him a little blood. He wasn't ashamed to drink in front of her. It's probably because he's drinken from her before and she had to take care of him before. After a few minutes of silence Buffy sighed, "So are we going to get serious now or call it a night and ignore me and you all together?"

Angel put his already empty mug down and answered her, "Thank you... for saving me."

Buffy shrugged, "Hey what are ex's for?"

Angel smiled back, "Seriously Buffy... thanks for Conner too. I know you haven't done anything but I know you, somehow you always manage to make everything okay."

Buffy lent back in her chair, "Thanks Angel."

Angel nodded and then finally looked into Buffy's eyes, "Now you ready for the emotional talk where one of us walks out?"

Buffy suddenly asked the question she's been waiting to ask for too long, "Why didn't you call me when he was born?" The question made Angel look up in surprise and wonder how much pain he had caused her this time. He didn't get to answer because she continued, "When I saw you on the beach I told you that you would get a reward, I thought that would be enough but I guess you just didn't connect the dots." He stayed silent which made Buffy even more nervous as she started guessing, "Did he get taken right away? Or was I too far in the back of your mind to remember?"

Angel finally interrupted, "Buffy, once Conner was born that kid was the only thing on my mind."

Buffy let the answer go because the one question she had been scared to ask since she found out about Conner popped into her head. She took a deep breath and looked Angel in the eyes after he took a sip from his mug, "Who's his mother?"

Angel looked confused. Out of all the things she knows, she didn't know that? "You don't know?" Buffy slowly shook her head. It took Angel a few seconds to respond but he finally managed to mumble one name, "Darla." Buffy fell into complete shock. She exhaled and looked into space. Angel knew she would take it hard and he didn't blame her, "Buffy..."

Buffy shook her head and continued to avoid his glance, "H...how?" Angel mentioned the word prophecy and Buffy finally pulled it together. She realized how the powers knew that Conner was going to do something great and she explained to Angel, "When I died Whistler said Conner was meant to be one of the most important champions, but he didn't know which side he would be on." Angel's head shot up as she continued, "This must be the critical moment he was talking about." Buffy lifted her head back to meet Angel's, "If we don't help him Angel we might end up having to kill him."

Angel took this hard. He was just expecting a complete freak-out about Darla being Conner's mother not a hard shot of reality. He grabbed Buffy's hand, "Then we won't lose him."

"You can't be sure of that. You can't be sure about anything remember."

Angel did remember and knew she was right. But he had to believe that Buffy could help his son because honestly he didn't know how to anymore. He just smiled back to her, "You got to have faith Buffy."

Buffy sighed, "God you too are so much alike. You're all about hoping it works out for the best."

Angel took the compliment and smiled, "At least I know he has one good quality. I haven't seen him do one thing human but eat." He smiled and Buffy only shook her head. She yawned though soon after and Angel giggled, "You should sleep."

Buffy shrugged, "I'm not tired."

Before Angel could come back with a cute comment Buffy's cell rang from the lobby. They rushed into the lobby and she picked it up only to have Anya yell at her, "Your sister is eating everything and she's being all nice to the customers. She messed up my organization of books."

Buffy sighed, "Calm down Anya."

"No, I will not calm down. She's taking up all of Xander's time and that's usually what I do. When are you coming home?"

"I'll call you guys tomorrow with all the details I promise. Now you go and take Xander away from Dawn. Bye Anya."

She didn't even wait for Anya to say bye before hanging her phone up and throwing her cell on the table. Buffy turned to face Angel, "They're already an old married couple."

Angel sat down on the couch confused, "Who?"

Buffy smiled and sat down beside him, "Xander got married before the summer ended. Him and Anya are living the married life."

Angel smiled and grabbed Buffy's hand, "That's great, really great."

Buffy nodded, "Oh yeah, it was. Well except for the hidious dresses."

"I can't believe Xander harris got married."

Buffy shrugged, "It was about time. I can bet soon they'll be having kids of their own. Leaving my sister with them is a good test run."

Angel nodded before softening his voice and tickling Buffy's hand with his thumb, "Tell me about my son, tell me the stuff I missed."

Buffy smiled and every word she spoke she got closer and closer to Angel until she lay with his arm draped around her and her body curled up against his side, "He loves to draw and he's so unbelieveably amazing at it. He was meant to fight, I mean when I was training him everything was so natural. Oh. he's so curious. He just loves to learn new things."

Angel was absorbing every bit of information with a smile on his face. "God I wish he didn't hate me."

Buffy gripped his hand tighter to be reassuring, "He doesn't hate you Angel. Right now all he knows is anger and mis-trust and after being filled with lies about you he has no choice but to feel hatred. He'll change Angel, I promise you he'll be okay."

Angel smiled, "I know you'll make sure of that." After a romantic silence Angel spoke, "What else did I miss?"

Buffy continued on and on about heaven and his son. A couple hours had passed before they realized there was nothing else to say. Buffy was almost asleep when Angel smiled, "Now you should sleep."

Buffy shrugged, "Conner will be up soon."

As much as Angel hated to give Buffy a reason to get off him he gave her a reason, "Then you should be there when he wakes up."

It surprised Buffy to the point of being extremely alert. She sat up quickly and Angel realized she took it the wrong way. Instead of a polite thing she saw it as a way for him to get her off of him. Buffy stood and walked to the stairs before Angel could say anything. Her last sentence before walking to Conner's room was, "I'm not done talking about Darla. Good night."

Angel kicked the couch and swore to himself before slowly making his way to his room for a miserable sleep wondering how such a nice moment could change so fast.

**-Conner's Room-**

Buffy walkied in to see Conner curled up to a pillow in the middle of the bed. She remembered how they used to fall asleep and walked over to the bed. She slowly and quietly removed the pillow and slid into it's place. Conner's arms instantly made sure she stayed close as they tightly wrapped around her.

Conner mumbled a few words, "What did he do?"

Buffy just smiled, kissed him on the top of the head and rested her head on top of his. "Just sleep Conner."

It wasn't long until both slayer and child were sleeping. Buffy slept with bitter sweet dreams to come her way while Conner slept with tainted dreams of where he grew up mixed with wonderful visions of the present, of Buffy.

**-Next Morningc - Lobby-**

Angel was first to wake up, only because he had the most uncomfortable bed. The second his eyes opened he was met with the faces of Cordy and Groo smiling at him. He was also met with a little sun and he was instantly awake when he hopped out of bed and into the more shadow filled part of the lobby.

Cordy and Groo laughed while Angel just waited for the smart comment to come out of Cordy's mouth, "Looks like you pissed off the wife. Not even together and she's kicking you out of the room."

Angel laughed sarcastically, "What are you guys doing here so early?"

Cordy answered, "Like we'd miss the soap opera of Buffy and Angel."

Groo followed up, "Yes, princess talked all night about this Buffy, this slayer. She often used her whiny voice to tell a story."

Angel smiled at Cordy's offended look while she sighed, "It's going to be a long day."

**-Conner's Room-**

Conner had awoken much earlier but lay in the arms of his Buffy. Every other place in the world Conner had to be strong, he had to be the best and he had the obligation of never letting anybody in since the day he was stolen from Angel but it was different with her. He felt safe, he felt trusting and he knew he wouldn't be alone in this world again. His facade instantly went down and it just felt right to not have to be on guard. Only one thing worried him now, that was anything happening to this goddess that lay before him. It was on that last thought that Buffy started to awaken. She flickered her eyes and smoothed her hair before smiling into the eyes of the glowing Conner.

She sat up a little, "How long have you been up?"

"Since the sun rose."

Buffy winked at him, "I always knew you'd be a morning person."

Conner sat up next to Buffy and got a little serious, "So what happens now?"

Buffy on the other hand was never serious when it came to just waking up. She smiled, "We're going to cook us some breakfast."

Conner smiled at one of the earlier memories of her cooking breakfast, "I don't deserve you Buffy Summers."

Buffy shrugged, "No one does, but if anyone got me I'm glad it's you."

Conner hopped out of bed and scooped Buffy up like a baby. "I don't think anyone would be up."

Buffy knew he would have to face them eventually but that didn't have to be now. As she giggled she opened the door when Conner reached it, "Shall we."

**-Lobby-**

Willow, Tara, Angel, Cordelia, Groo, Gunn and Fred sat lounging around in the lobby when Conner got to the top of the stairs. Buffy's giggling got everyone's attention and soon everyone eyed the two as they came down the stairs. When they got to the bottom suddenly everything seemed so much more real because the yes that stared at them almost hurt. Conner put Buffy down and his mask was up once more. He suddenly hated everyone in this room especially Angel and his whole body pulsed with anger. Angel was almost the same way as he stood and tried everything to control his anger. The only thing stopping him from attacking the boy who drowned him for three months was the words in his head that repeated over and over, 'he's your son.'

Buffy couldn't take the silence anymore and grabbed Conner's hand before addressing everyone, "I'm cooking some pancakes so who wants breakfast?"

Willow smiled, "You know we're in."

Conner growled and Buffy turned to glare at him, "Conner."

Conner avoided her disappointed glare hoping never to recieve it again. He spoke though, "I thought it was just going to be me and you, like it used to be."

Buffy sighed, "Sometimes we take what we can get Conner."

Conner shook his head and Angel couldn't control himself anymore, "Always the selfish one, I wonder where he got that from."

Conner's head shot to stare down his own father until Buffy stepped between them, "It is too god damn early for this and I'm hungry and..." She looked around the room as she spoke, "...where's Spike?"

Tara smiled, "He walked in at sunrise. Probably crashed out in a basement."

Conner looked at Buffy, "Another vampire. I remember him, the one with the letter who was supossed to tell Angel you died."

Buffy nodded, "Yeah."

Conner shook his head, "At least before I was born there were no such thing as killers."

Buffy suddenly realized that being serious was her only choice. She touched Conner's shoulder, "Why don't you go wait in the kitchen sweetie? You can make the dough and add the chocolate chips."

Cordelia laughed, "First of all Angel wouldn't keep that kind of stuff here and second of all Conner knows how to cook?"

They both ignored her and Buffy stared at Conner once more, "Do you know your way around L.A?"

Conner nodded, "A little."

Buffy smiled, "Good. You go for breakfast while I talk to everyone." Conner was about to interrupt but Buffy grabbed his hand, "Please Conner. You know you can trust me. When you come back I'll have everything sorted out, I promise."

Conner gripped her hand tighter, "Fine. Be here when I get back."

Buffy nodded, "I wouldn't want to be anywhere else."

She handed him some money and he looked back at Willow, "She better be here when I come back. No more of that magic."

Buffy spoke for Willow, "No more magic. I'll see you when you get back." She kissed his head and Conner walked out. Buffy turned back to face everyone and their dissappointing faces.


	20. Thin Lining

**_A/N -_** _I don't know if you guys like it but I love the whole Willow and tara kind of being the aunti-like figure towards Conner. Maybe it's just me and I'm sorry if you don't like it. As with all my other fics I'm sorry for the updates not being regular. I've got schoold, new years and work not to mention DRAMA! Anywho hope you like._

**-Lobby-**

Buffy didn't wait for anyone to speak as she quickly laid out her very little thought out plan, "Look guys, I know he's a little insensitive but it'll change, I promise. You just gotta let us have some time and talk it all out before trying to include all of you."

Willow nodded, "We're all for that buffy. I mean you know Tara and I feel guilty all ready so we're willing to be whatever you need but we can't stay for long. We have classes soon."

Buffy nodded and comprimised, "Give me a day with him. No one else. We'll talk and I'll have something concrete by the end of the day I promise."

Angel knew this was the only woman who would be able to turn his son around and took her offer, "Fine, a day buffy. The second the sun sets though our patients could be worn too thin."

Buffy couldn't believe it. After their conversation last night and his heartfelt concern he was acting completely irrational, "He's your son Angel. There should never be a time limit on how long you can wait for him." She didn't wait for him to defend his statement and stared at Willow and Tara, "If you guys want to go back tonight I can make Spike take you and I could take the bus or get my dad to drive me."

That's when Spike walked in, "Where am I driving now pet?"

Buffy looked at Tara and then to Spike where she answered for Buffy, "No where Spike. No where until sunset."

Spike looked up at Buffy, "I missed the whole Conner group talk huh?"

Buffy shrugged and nodded, "You wouldn't of liked it anyway. Just a bunch of limits on how long I can spend with him."

Spike smiled, "Ah, the witches got school, Dawn's with Anya and Xander, Peaches losing his patience, and insensitivity of everyone else. Got it."

Buffy actually smiled, "Hey Spike, I kind of need you out of the way today. I mean you've been an amazing help but it's a Conner day."

"No worries slayer, I've got me some business to take care of. Been a while since I've been in L.A."

Cordy piped in, "Yeah, last time you were here you tortured Angel for a god damn ring that he broke anyway."

Spike and Buffy looked at Angel and spoke the same words quite loudly, "YOU BROKE THE RING!"

Spike couldn't believe it, "Why on earth would you do that. If you didn't want the gift you should have sent it back to the slayer so she could give it to me."

Angel got defensive, "Why exactly would she give it to you?"

Buffy answered, "Because he'd be more of use to me if he as incapable of dying."

The instant defensiveness in Buffy's voice on Spike's behalf was tearing Angel up inside. He was so confused, angry, happy and annoyed. Willow stepped in though, "So Buffy, how exactly are you going to turn the kid around?"

Cordy put her two cents in now too, "Being nice to him doesn't work."

Fred nodded, "Really doesn't."

Buffy sighed, "I don't want to change him guys, I just want him to not be a danger. Sometimes emotional defenses like that can be helpful."

Cordy again stepped in, "Are you sure you're the right person to do this? I mean it seems like you've got some of your own issues."

Spike interrupted, "Her issues seem to mesh with the boys so maybe she's the perfect person."

The way both Spike's and Buffy's minds were so in sync was killing Angel. He finally had it, "Fine. You do what you need to but if it doesn't work we do things my way."

Buffy though couldn't believe the tone in Angel's voice. It was completely shocking to her. She darkened her voice and looked him in the eyes, "Conner is your son Angel. Now I don't care what your issues are anymore but you sure as hell won't talk about him like that with me around again, do you hear me?"

Angel pretty much only heard the part about Buffy ordering him around, "You're right Buffy, he's my son. You can't waltz in here and act like you can fix everything so that we do things your way."

Buffy shook her head, "I have waited since I was torn out of that place to see him again. It's not even just the fact he's your son because I have sure as hell spent more time with him than you have. Now I am trying to do everything I can to make things right between you two but if that's not what you want I'll pack up and leave right now but I'll be taking Conner with me because he won't want to stay here."

Angel let out a small growl and knew somewhere Buffy would eventually make it okay but her tone and control was just ticking him off, "Fine! But you can't expect to come in here and tell us all what to do thinking we're going to do it."

Buffy smiled, "Whatever you say boss." She didn't wait for an answer as she stared at Willow, "You must be hungry so when Conner walks into the kitchen tell him to meet me in the training room. I'm suddenly in the mood to hit things before breakfast."

Angel caught the hidden meaning and couldn't help but express his feelings, "If you have something to say then say it."

Buffy looked at him, "I think I've said it and anything else would result in an arguement I don't need and I didn't come here for." She looked at Spike, "You up to get the crap kicked out of you?"

Spike shrugged, "I could spare some of my morning for a round with a slayer."

Buffy walked off in search for the training room while Spike winked at Willow, "You ready to pick up the pieces?"

Willow smiled, "You're the only one she talks to anymore Spike, it looks like this ones on you."

Spike nodded and walked off. Cordelia turned at looked at Angel, "Look who woke up on the cranky side of the bed."

Angel scoffed and walked up the stairs. He did what he does best, he lay down on his bed brooding and thinking about what the actual reason for his whole outburst was because he knew Buffy was right on some level.

**-Half An Hour Later - Kitchen-**

Conner walked into the kitchen and avoided everyone on the way there but was met with the eyes of Willow and Tara as he entered. He put the bag of stuff on the table and waited for one of them to talk. Tara smiled, "She's in the training room. Her and Spike were in the mood for a work out."

Conner didn't say a word as he moved to exit the kitchen but Willow stood up and stopped him. "Conner."

He turned around with a deadly glare on his face which made her nervous. She had to say what she did though, "Look Conner, we're sorry we took her way from you, and we're sorry that we ever caused you pain and her more then anything but we're not sorry she's here."

His glare disappeared and he actually listened when tara stood up and continued, "We uh...we didn't know where she was or what happened exactly but we knew we needed her back. We know you know what it's like to need her in your life."

Willow finished off the apology, "Now I don't want you to hate me because when you become a part of Buffy's life, you become a part of ours and I don't want it to be all awkward. You need her more in this life then you did in that one and I just felt like now that you've found each other it was time for a real welcome."

Conner put on a confused look, "Welcome?"

Tara smiled and grabbed Willow's hand, "Welcome to the family."

Family? The word rung in Conner's head for a while. A family? He didn't know it was possible. He didn't smile or anything though as he nodded, "A family?"

Willow nodded, "That means you can talk to us, you can come to us for anything. I know you won't because you have Buffy but it means you can and we'd totally be there for you."

Conner still had his facade up though, "How do I know I can believe anything you say?"

Tara shook her head, "You can't know. You need to take risks Conner and sometimes those risks end badly but when you take a risk on the right person like Buffy did with you it ends very well."

Conner thought about it and walked to the door. He glanced back, "A family." He didn't wait for them to respond as he walked off to the training room.

**-Training Room-**

Conner walked in just as Buffy had thrown Spike into the wall. he smiled and leaned on the door frame while he watched the spar before him. Everytime Spike would hit her he would get nervous but she'd always come back and amaze him even more. Watching this slayer fight was magical to him. Conner had trained with her before obviously but he had no idea her capabilities came up to this level and suddenly he got the feeling she was capable of even more then this. Buffy rolled Spike off of her and Conner laughed which only got Buffy's attention.

While Spike was recouperating on the ground Buffy walked up to Conner with a big smile, "You're back." He only nodded and then looked at the groaing Spike. Buffy smiled, "Your dad got me mad."

Conner shrugged, "I'm not surprised."

Buffy still wasn't happy with his tone when Angel's name was mentioned but expected it. She quickly changed the subject, "So you got breakfast food?"

Conner smiled, "Oh yeah."

During Buffy's giggle a brassed off Spike hopped to his feet and attacked her. before Conner could do anything Buffy extended her leg backwards and nailed him in his mid section causing him to drop to the floor in pain. Conner actually smiled while Buffy wrapped her arms around Conner.

She walked with him to the door where she looked back at Spike finally, "Thank Spike. Oh yeah, don't get into too much trouble today, please." Then Buffy and Conner left leaving Spike in his moaning and groaning state.

**-Kitchen-**

Willow and Tara were just finishing their breakfast when Conner and Buffy walked in to make theirs. The witches were by the sink and smiled at the heroes entrence. Buffy looked a little edgy though, "So, how was breakfast."

Willow only smiled, "We're leaving."

Conner looked up into her eyes and spoke before he knew what he was saying, "You don't have to."

Buffy looked at him complete shocked while the witches stood stunned but they understood. Buffy didn't, "Are you sure?"

Willow interrupted again, "We would stay but we're full and we hear L.A. shopping is to die for. Plus I think you two need bonding time. So rain check til dinner."

The disappointmet Conner usually feels when somebody leaves or makes excuses to leave just wasn't there. Truth lingered in Willow's eyes and he knew, he knew that eventually, in time it would be okay to call her a friend. He nodded at Willow, "Be here."

Tara blew him a kiss before walking out of the kitchen. Willow looked at Buffy, "The kid will talk to you."

She winked before leaving Buffy to smile at Conner, "What happened?"

Conner moved to take out the pans for the pancakes while trying to find a way to explain the wierd moment, "I walked in hoping to find you and I found them instead. They uh apologized and then welcomed me to the family." He turned to look Buffy in the eye knowing that it was okay to show emotions around her, "A family Buffy. I don't even know what that means."

Buffy walked up to him, grabbed his hands and looked him directly in the eyes, "A family means never having to be alone." She loosesned her grip a little and finished her explanation at his smile, "They're right you know. Now that I found you, now that we're back it means you have a place to go, people to go to, it means you have a family."

Conner held the most amazing smile and grabbed Buffy's hand, "Good."

She kissed his forhead and looked at the stove, "You ready to get started?"

Conner giggled and took out the groceries while Buffy took out pans. The duration of cooking breakfast consisted of laughter and affection. Buffy left the serious stuff aside for now as she enjoyed her life for the first time in a really long time. When the pancakes were done, they sat down and ate them. She fed him and he fed her while drowning eachother's pancakes in syrup and laughing.

**-Upstairs - Angel's Room-**

Angel lay on his bed staring up at the cieling for answers like he had done when Buffy had disappeared. That was the strange part to him. A few months ago she wasn't even in this world, he was dead inside because she wasn't there and now that she was in this world, in his kitchen all he wanted to do was run to her and never let her go. So why did he treat her so cruelly? Why did he end up yelling? Could it have been because she had known his son more then he had? Could it have been because he was jealous of her as he always was? Could it be because it hurt him to be around her knowing that she would end up leaving and her leaving hating him made it easier to let her go? All those reasons combined lead him to his room. Buffy and his son were probably eating right about now. Laughing and smiling and talking. The family he thought he could never have was downstairs and he didn't know why he was upstairs. Oh yeah, right, his son hated him. Buffy would make it all okay, she always did, even at her own risk. God he loved that woman and he winced at the thought of her leaving again. Suddenly he knew it was time for an apology and as always it was him making it. He hopped off his bed and walked out of his room. Once out of sight Cordelia appeared from the darkness behind the door staring in the path Angel had taken with a small envious glare on her face.


	21. Change in a day

**_A/N -_** _I have been writing this story frantically but this is all I could update today. Stupid net cafe's. Anywho I hope I didn't let you down and I am so freaking sorry about the LONGEST non updating time ever. I will try my hardest not to let that happen again just bear with me because even I'm starting to like where this story is going. also THANKS SO MUCH YOU REVIEWERS! I MEAN I HAVE BEEN SO ANXIOUS TO UPDATE BECAUSE OF YOU!_

**-Wesley's Apartment-**

Wesley lay in silence almost asleep with a bottle of alcohol on the sidetable beside him. He had spent most of his nights this way for a long while. Right now, he thought about his plan to save Angel and about how that backfired. He thought about Buffy and he thought about Lilah. As if she had read his mind Lilah burst into his apartment and she was mad.

She walked right up to the bed to face an unphased Wesley, "You son of a bitch." Wesley looked over at her just in time for her explanation, "We picked up Justine yesterday at the docks and she had a bunch of useful information. You saved him, you knew where he was and you saved him."

"Lilah..."

She wouldn't let him get a word in, "You had Justine this whole time. You're good. I hate to admit it but you're good."

Wesley sat up with his legs on the side of the bed closest to Lilah with her not even five feet away, "I didn't save him. I was going to and I did have her caged in my closet but Buffy showed up." The name Buffy shocked Lilah and Wesley noticed. Suddenly he was wide awake, "What's going on Lilah?"

Lilah smiled her evil calm smile once more, "Buffy back in L.A. the senior partners are going to love this."

Wesley cursed himself for letting the slayers whereabouts leak. He knew better then that. Still he played it cool, "Your new obsession?"

Lilah shook her head slowly, "On the contrary. Buffy used to be a huge ally back in the day but as we followed her life these past few years...let's just say she's quite the opposite of where we thought she should be. Angel and that Giles fellow really turned her around." She stared deep into Wesley's eyes as if she was trying to read him like she always did before one of their late night meetings, "You were also there for a little while."

The fact that Buffy was considered and ally of the most evil place in the world rung over and over in his head. He couldn't believe it. Had Buffy really been that stupid? It would explain why she tried so hard with Faith. He continued to keep his face unreadable to all emotions as he smiled up at his lover, "I didn't like her then and I don't know her now. It's none of my business."

Lilah shrugged, "You really have changed Wesley."

Wesley wrapped his arms around her waist in front of him and pulled her body right up close to his. She stared up at Lilah and smiled, "Change is good."

Lilah looked as if she was pondering something and smiled, "I have a few hours before a meeting."

Wesley smiled, "A few hours Lilah. You do love to over-estimate yourself." Before she could say anything else their lips were attached in a very passionate kiss that didn't end for at least the next hour or so.

**-Hyperion - Kitchen-**

Buffy and Conner had just finished eating. Buffy lay back in her chair, "Oh Conner, I'm so full."

Conner smiled, "You want me to carry you upstairs?"

Buffy shook her head, "Nope, I'm good." Conner stared at the very uncomfortable and adorable Buffy Summer's before him in admiration with a smile on his face. She looked up at him finally, "What? Am I already really fat?"

Conner laughed and shook his head, "No, it's just... You're beautiful Buffy, you inspire me."

Buffy smiled and took the compliment. "Thank you." She then thought this would be a good time to start their infamous talking. "When was the last time you drew Conner? I could use a good picture of me."

Conner really thought about it and fell back in his chair, "I think I've only drawn anything once in this life anyway. Some kind of light or angel in quortoth. I left it behind though when I came back here."

Buffy grabbed his hand, "So, you want to tell me how you got back here?" Conner shook his head slowly and Buffy knew it was okay if he didn't want to tell her right now. She smiled instead, "So why don't you go work out some of the artist inside of you and I can take a look. I've really missed our whole fire, read and draw moments."

Conner grabbed her hand really tight, "Don't go anywhere."

Buffy shook her head, "I'd never want to."

Conner winked at her before standing up and started to clear the dishes. Buffy shook her head, "Don't worry Conner, I got them. You go and draw me something pretty."

Conner nodded and rushed out the kitchen exit. Buffy knew it was a lame excuse to make Conner leave because he could draw her anything, anytime but she could hear and sense Angel's shoes and presense. She knew he was listening in the dark somewhere. It comforted her in the way of making her remember how cute the lurking was to her in high school but it angered her that he thought that she needed him there, like she needed supervision. She picked up the plates and walked over to the sink.

When her back faced the door she sighed, "You going to stand there all day, or just wait until he comes back to make sure I say the right stuff then?"

Angel slowly walked into the kitchen and watched as Buffy washed the dishes they just used. It took him a few seconds to say anything, "I needed to talk to you."

Buffy sighed, "If this is about what i say to him or how I say it you're wasting your time. I'm going to help him my way and I'm sorry you feel like you nee..."

Angel cut her off instantly, "I'm sorry."

Buffy shut off the water and turned around, "What?"

Angel sighed and scratched the back of his head while he thought up something to say, "I over reacted Buffy and I know that. I love Conner more then anything, he's my son Buffy, there's no way I wouldn't do anything possible to help him."

Buffy got defensive, "That's all I'm trying to do."

Angel held up his hands in defeat, "I know that Buffy! On the one hand you are trying to make it better, you are trying to save my son but that's not the only reason." He looked her dead in the eyes, "You got the chance to know everything about him, you know what hand he writes with, you know what he likes to eat, what he likes on Tv and even how he fights, hell you taught him how to fight. This isn't just about me, this is about you and how you need to feel better, about how you need him."

Buffy nodded, "I'm not going to lie to you Angel. I love him and when I left my heart broke into pieces. I couldn't do anything in Sunnydale without feeling like I left a part of me back in that place. I have never hid that fact from you, so why are you all of a sudden defensive over that fact I'm trying to help him?"

"I'm jealous." Buffy's eyes widened in realization as Angel continued, "You have everything I ever wanted with him. You taught him everything I wanted to, you became his mother Buffy and walking in here already with that role..."

Buffy held up her hand already guilty, "I'm sorry Angel. I'm sorry you feel like this but I can't just leave, I can't leave him again until he knows I'll always be here."

"I'm not asking you to, Buffy. I'm not saying it's a bad thing, I'm just saying it hurts. You need to be here for him. You're the only person in the world right now who he'll get close to and I need him to be okay, I need him to be happy even if it's not with me."

Buffy moved close enough to Angel to grab one of his hands, "That's the point of my trip Angel, I want him to be happy with you and I will do everything I can to make him see that's possible. I had a lot of his past but you'll have his future if it's the last thing I do."

Angel half smiled down at the love of his life, "You're an amazing woman buffy Summers."

Buffy shrugged it off, "What can I say, everybody loves me." Angel only smiled as a comfortable moment passed between them. Buffy eventually sighed though and broke the silence, "You know if we want this trip to stay about Conner we have got to avoid being alone in the same room."

Angel smiled and their hands slowly split apart, "So what are you guys going to do today?"

Buffy shrugged, "The park and an emotional breakthrough at the ocean he stuck you in. Tough love."

Angel nodded, "You're so good to him."

Buffy nodded and sat down on a chair, "You know, you and me are kind of on the same boat. We both just get Conner back and now we have to find a way to be around him. It just feels so right, like I was supossed to be here with him." Buffy thought about that and remembered Whistler, "Actually since Whistler said I'm supossed to be here then I am probably meant to be here."

Angel sat down in front of her, "It's good that you came."

Buffy nodded and before they could allow this trip to suddenly become an emotional overload she smiled, "So, what is everybody here doing?" Angel shrugged and Buffy smiled, "You should think about that 'welcome back Angel' party!"

Angel laughed, "Could be fun if I could taste cake."

Buffy laughed along until she saw the dishes, "I should finish those and then get going."

Angel stood up first, "I should leave before Conner comes back." Buffy just blinked and Angel rubbed her shoulders before whispering one word and walking out the door, "Thanks." Buffy smiled after him before standing up to finish the dishes to get on with the soap opera day.

**-Lobby-**

Everyone in the hotel was resting or lounging in the main room with the exception of Buffy and Connor. Willow sighed in the silence, "You know having a welcome back party kind of includes a cake, some hats and you know the occassional mingling or talking."

Angel smiled and realized how much he had missed Willow. She always added such an innocence to the world, like it could always be better so he agreed, "I like the way you think."

Cordelia hopped up and was about to volunteer to go to the store until the doors to the Hyperion opened causing Angel to fly back from the sun. Once he got up absolute anger surged through him as he saw the intruder. Wesley stood before everyone with an apsolute apathetic look on his face. Willow and Tara knew what was going on because they were told the story last night so they didn't know whether to be mad or happy to see a somewhat old friend. Wesley on the other hand didn't want to be in a room with so many who didn't like him and got right to the point.

He took two steps into the hotel and heard Angel's growl before he stopped, "I need to see Buffy."

Cordelia stepped up, "She's busy with the boy."

Wesley stared directly into Angel's eyes, "She could be in a lot of danger."

Angel stopped growling but the reluctance to even be in the same room witht he man who stole his child lingered. It took everything in him to be civil towards this man, his old friend, "What's going on?"

Wesley shook his head, "I know you don't want me to be here and I don't much want to be here myself but I thought it my duty to warn Buffy and you are not Buffy."

Angel was about to lose all his control when Spike patted him on the shoulder and walked towards the kitchen, "I'll get her, just nobody dies while I'm gone."

The room was left with all attention on Wesley. Willow decided to break the tension or try at least, "Hi Wesley, been a while." All he could do was send a small smile her way while keeping an eye on Angel.

**-Kitchen-**

Connor had come back down and he was just finishing up a drawing before Spike walked in. Buffy looked up at his smirk and sighed, "What's going on now?"

Spike pointed towards the lobby, "Stuffy watcher walked in, says he's got some stuff to tell you. Your life might be in danger...again." Connor and Buffy were standing instantly and followed Spike back out to the main room.

**-Lobby-**

The second Buffy saw Wesley her emotions became confused. She stared at her connor and grabbed his hand before walking right up to Wesley and deciding that as long as Connor is here now that nothing else really mattered. Wesley couldn't even look at Connor as he thought about the pain that he had caused him alone and kept his gaze on Buffy.

The slayer looked him in the eye, "You sound like you got some news?"

Wesley nodded and looked around before looking back at her, "It's news that you might not want to share with everyone in this room."

Buffy nodded and looked at Connor, "I'm going to be in Angel's office with Wesley. I'll be back I promise."

Connor looked Wesley in the eye, "You keep her safe."

Wesley nodded and walked towards the office. Angel turned his deadly glare towards Buffy, "What the hell are you doing?"

Buffy sighed, "Wesley screwed up but Connor's here now Angel. You got to learn to move on. Don't forgive him just move on. Now I'll be back in a few minutes."

As she stalked off towards the office everyone's gaze turned towards Connor. Willow smiled at him, "So what do you think of the drama so far?"

Connor stared at the office door while he answered, "Me and Buffy used to talk all the time about her life but I'm starting to think she has a lot of secrets, some even I don't know about. Maybe if she didn't this drama as you call it wouldn't exist."

Tara nodded, "Everybody's got secrets, it's what makes us human."

Connor finally looked at the girls, "I'm sorry I snapped before, I have a lot of stuff to sort through."

Willow nodded, "It's okay. Just remember what we said. You can come to us for anything."

Connor looked around the room at the confused faces before nodding. Angel stared at Tara and Willow completely dumbfounded. Even strangers could get him to talk to them. The curiousity of what was going on in the office was killing him a long with the tension of silence in the lobby with Connor constantly glaring at him.

**-Angel's Office-**

Buffy instantly sat down on the desk as Wesley stood in front of her. There was a short silence that was beginning to get awkward until Wesley finally spoke, "I suposse Angel talked to you about Connor then."

Buffy nodded, "He told me about what you did. I've known Connor since I died." At his confused look Buffy sighed, "I'll tell you about it later."

Wesley nodded, "I'm not sorry Buffy, I believed what I did was right and..."

Buffy stopped him, "I get it Wesley. You wouldn't be able to do anything to hurt a fly unless you though it was right but if you ever touch him again you won't begin to understand the pain I put you through." Another silence engulfed them after the watcher nodded until Buffy couldn't take it, "So my life is in danger?"

Wesley nodded, "I've been spending time with a woman you might know, Lilah?" Buffy's blood ran cold and her gaze at Wesley was not in recognition but fear. Wesley noticed her change and was even more curious if that's possible. He continued, "I didn't mean to... She came to my apartment looking for the perosn who saved Angel and I let it slip that you were in L.A." Buffy stayed silent unable to choose which feeling she should be expressing right now. So Wesley just continued hoping to bring something out fo her, "She also mentioned you used to be an ally."

Buffy finally stood up ready to respond, "I have never hid the fact that I had a past in L.A. Now I did a lot of things and talking to Lilah and Lyndsey was the biggest mistake I have ever made next to listening to them. I don't feel like I have to explain everything to you and frankly it would take a long time." She looked her old friend in the eye, "You said you've been seeing her?"

He nodded, "I don't feel I need to explain myself to you and frankly..."

Buffy cut off his repetition of her words, "I understand, just be careful Wes. You never have any idea what you're getting into with her." A genuine half smile appeared on his face but dissappeared when Buffy spoke, "So when do you see her next?"

"Whenever I call I suposse, why?"

Buffy sighed, "I want this cleared up with her. Could you do me a favor?"

"Depends."

"Call her and tell her to meet you at the beach, the one where Angel was this past summer at about 4 tomorrow morning. I don't want anyone else knowing about this."

Wesley nodded, "I can do that." He was about to leave when something popped into his head and without thinking he said it, "Will you hurt her?"

Buffy understood his connection to her, it was a lot like the one she had with Spike without the sex, so she shook her head, "You know as well as I do that there might be a fight but nothing can hurt her. Just tell her to come alone so make it sound like a date or something, just so i dont' get ambushed or anything."

Wesley smiled, "Of course."

He again was about to leave until Buffy grabbed his arm sleeve, "So what are we going to tell them?" Wesley shrugged and Buffy sighed as the slayer tried to think up something on the way out to the lobby.

**-Lobby-**

The meeting with Buffy left Wesley completely unsatisfied of his curiousity and awaiting the meeting at the beach. He walked right to the door and Willow waved, "Bye Wesley."

He again just shot her a small smile and walked out the door. Everyone stood staring at Buffy until Angel and Connor spoke at the same time, "What was that?"

Father and son stared at ecahother for a second before looking at Buffy for an answer, "It was nothing. Wesley ran into an old friend of mine who he thought was an enemy but turned out to be just an old aquaintence. Just warned me that she might be showing up sometime soon."

Angel was half believeing her, "And who was this friend?"

Buffy shrugged it off, "It was just some imformant I used to beet the crap out of. She's my Spike seven years ago."

Spike piped up, "So, I'm looking to be replaced am I?"

Buffy shook her head, "As if, she's way too ditzy." She then instantly changed the subject which lead Spike, Angel and Connor to believe she was lying but they both stayed quiet as Buffy just kept talking and stared at Connor, "So, I have plans for me and you while Angel here has his big party."

Connor nodded and smiled, "I'm all yours."

Buffy smiled and looked at Angel, "We'll be back soon, have some fun and uh try not worry alright, I got him."

Angel nodded and watch Buffy take Connor by the arm and walk her towards the door. Cordelia then interrupted the silence by addressing everyone, "So what am I getting from the store?"

Someone said chips, pop, cake, ice cream, hate and all the party essentials but the last thing Buffy heard before her and Connor left was Spike yelling, "Don't forget a little O Negative to spike the punch."

**_A/N -_** _Just to let you guys know o negative is blood. I know you're not stupid but just in case._


	22. Making Progress

**-The Park - About 5 hours later-**

Buffy and Connor had walked all over a lot of the city talking about the beauty of this and that, drawing a little, discussing Buffy's past, she showed him where she used to live, where she used to go to school and now they were at the park a little ways from her old high school. Buffy and Connor each sat at a swing facing the old high school. Buffy let out a deep breath, "Despite the fact we're superheroes I am tired of all this walking."

Connor just nodded, "Well, you are a girl at heart."

Buffy pushed his swing into the pole and they started laughing. When that died down Connor stared out into nothing like he was looking for something. Buffy didn't like the cold stare that had grown on him, "Where did that 'I feel nothing and I'm the strongest man in the world' look come from?"

Connor looked at her clueless, "What?"

Buffy smiled, "When we were in "Before-heaven" you always had this smile on your face and now... now you kind of look like you're expecting pain. Kind of like your dad. The notorious broody stare."

Connor shook his head and looked down, "Why do you always have to compare me to him?"

Buffy saw that the direct approach was not going to work with this boy and explained with a totally different story that sounded like she was changing the subject so he would listen, "Look over there Connor." She pointed towards the door she walked out of and the steps she walked onto when Angel first saw her and she met her first watcher, "You know, I was told I was going to be a watcher on those steps." It got his attention, "My watcher came right up to me and said that I had a destiny, said that I had the power. That night we went out to the graveyard I'm going to show you on patrol and I killed my first vampire." She winked at Connor, "I missed the heart."

Connor smiled, "We all miss the first time."

Buffy nodded and continued, "So I went home, my parents fought and ever since then with the exception of two years I have never had an esape from that routine. I live the day with somebody telling me I have the power, I go and patrol, I go home and Dawns fighting with me or Willow and Tara or Xander and Anya."

Connor stared into her hurting eyes, "Why are you telling me this?"

Buffy looked back at him, "I'm telling you this because there on those steps was the first time your dad saw me." Connor already looked away but Buffy kept talking, "I didn't know it then because the first time I met him I kicked him to the ground in an alley but ever since then until the two years later he left me he was my escape. I got to go home to a man that loved me more then the world and every demon or vampire that existed dissappeared. I told you this story right?" Connor only nodded, "Then why do you hate him so much?"

Connor couldn't take it anymore, it felt like all she was doing was punishing him for hating his own dad so he stood up and threw the swing back and stood right in front of Buffy. He spoke with so much anger written in his voice, "You want to know why Buffy? I hate him because he was supossed to save me. Everytime I hear about a dad it's about them being thier for thier child. He let me get sucked into a hell dimension where I was raised by an amazing man. Now that was my father. He taught me the truth Buffy, he told me every bloody horror story of Angelus, even little stories of your Spike there. You want to know how many woman they raped? How many families they slaughtered? How many children they tortured? Holtz, my father would never lie to me."

Buffy stood up also absorbed by anger, "You think I don't know that Connor? I wouldn't be the slayer everyone thinks I am if I didn't know. Now I'm not saying that Holtz lied to you because he didn't. Angelus was a ruthless evil son of a bitch, I would know because well I met him."

Connor shook his head, "You look at him everyday."

"NO!" The volume and passion in her voice scared Connor so she toned it down a little bit, "No, Connor. That man..."

He cut her off, "VAMPIRE!"

"...That man is the most amazing and compassionate person I have ever met. He would do anything for me and you. I am not asking you to forgive him right now and I am not asking you to apologize to him; all I am asking you to do is understand. Please Connor you have to understand the difference between Angel and the horrific monster that killed all those people. I also want you to understand the difference between wishing vengence upon someone and taking it."

Connor looked into the slayer's eyes with a small tear, "That's what he said to me."

Buffy grabbed his hands, "I don't want to hurt you Connor because well I love you so much but I don't want you living the rest of your life so full of hatred especially when you don't need to. Angel's a good man, just do me a favor and get to know him now, get to know his soul before you try and kill him again."

Connor stared into the watery eyes of his best friend and couldn't help but cave, "I'm not apologizing to him... right now."

"All I'm asking for is time Connor. You'll see the difference in no time if you're willing to look past the vampire the face."

Connor squeezed the slayers hand, "How were you able to do that so easily?"

Buffy smiled, "Oh it wasn't easy. I got to know Angel before I found out he was a vampire and about his soul. Then your mom bit my mom and I thought it was your dad and when I went to kill him I couldn't. I offered him a chance to kill me but he didn't. Me and your dad have a lot of history."

Connor smiled, "I'm getting that." With that statement questions lingered about his mother but suddenly once looking into Buffy's eyes once more they didn't matter. "What about Spike?"

Buffy took a deep breath, "Him, Dru and your dad when he was evil WITHOUT A SOUL..." Connor half smiled at her, "...tried to kill me, he stole my friends, he tried to kill me once he got some special ring, he then got a chip put in his head that made him not able to hurt things that aren't evil and ever since then he's been my worst enemy, he's been in love with me and we're best friends depending on which day you catch us on."

"So he loves you too?"

Buffy nodded, "Oh yeah, I'm a hit with the evil crowd."

"I love you."

Buffy shrugged, "Well then you're probably going ot be evil."

After they had the laugh that broke all the tension from before Connor looked up at the sky, "Sun is setting, have we been gone that long?"

Buffy nodded, "Yep and we're still not done." She started to pull him in the direction towards the graveyard she was talking about, "It's time to kill vampires."

Connor only laughed, "It's about time." The the heroes took off with a sprint towards the graveyard...

**-Hyperion - Lobby-**

Everyone sat around in a circle with hats on and a bowl of chips on the table in the middle. Even Spike managed to have his two cents in the conversation with a bunch of humans and Angel. Willow was actually the one talking right now though, "...So this invisible girls terrorizing the school and as usual me, Xander and Giles think we can handle her so we go into this room and got locked in there while the gas gets turned on. So I'm about to die and Xander's about to die so of course that's when Angel decides to open the door and turn off the gas."

Cordelia joined in there, "Oh yeah, that's when me and Buffy were tied to chairs and my face was almost mangled by a super unpopular invisible girl. Thank god for her being a slayer."

Groo smiled, "She saved my goddess."

Willow giggled, "She's saved your goddess many MANY times before."

Angel even had to smile. Even though the food was good, the blood was good, and everyone was happy telling Angel stories, the vampire himself couldn't help but wonder about his love and his child. Spike patted his shoulder, "She's got it under control."

**-Graveyard-**

In reality though Buffy and Connor had run into a nasty prediament also known as nine vampires who just wouldn't die or stay down. The slayer herself had a bunch of cuts on her arms from her own stake and a few tears in her pants while Connor had a few more cuts then she did and his shirt was pretty ripped. Buffy was looking pretty tired and Connor was pretty well wasted too. Two of the vamps had Buffy and Connor on the ground next to each other.

The slayer looked at Connor, "You ready to make a run for it?"

Connor shook his head, "We can take them." At that moment another vampire socked him accross the face, "I can deal with running."

Buffy smiled, "On three... One...two..."

At that moment both slayer and child kicked off the vamps on top of them and sprung to thier feet. Now instead of advancing of waiting for the vamps to get up they both sprinted the opposite direction. The vamp on the ground growled, "Get them."

About 30 feet away buffy looked back and saw two gaining on them and then the last three behind those two. Buffy sighed, "God I wish they were all easy to kill."

Connor shook his head, "Then there'd be no fun."

Buffy couldn't believe it, "What is it with you men and enjoying violence so much? Is it just the guys I hang out with because I have to make new friends." Connor shrugged and smiled. He waited for Buffy to come up with a paln which didn't take that long, "Okay so we're going to split up." He already didn't like the plan and it got worse as she continued, "I'm going to lead them towards the park at this next turn through the woods. You take the other turn, go back for Spike and Angel and uh if I killed them all by the park then it was good excercise but personally I think we're going to need the help."

She was expecting an argument but she didn't get one, "Alright, be safe."

Buffy nodded, "Don't die alright."

He nodded and at the turn Buffy turned right and Connor turned left. The vampires stopped for a mili second to hear the lead vamp say, "You five with me, I want the slayer. You four get me the boy. We're feasting tonight."

**-Hyperion - Lobby-**

The party was dying down and everyone had kind of grown quiet. Spike was about to announce his dissappearance into the night but instead got to see Connor get thrown through the door by one of the vampires. Connor stood instantly but obviously hurt and explained very quickly, "Help."

Gunn, Groo, Angel, and Spike were on thier feet instantly just to see the other three vamps enter the room. It worried everyone instantly to not see Buffy but the main worry was Connor who just got thrown through a door. Angel looked at Willow, "Take care of him." Willow nodded and Connor walked towards her. Angel looked at the now hesitant four vampires in front of them. "Weapons would be nice."

Cordy and Fred took off to do that while Spike stared at the wannabe's before him, "You guys are it?"

Connor smiled, "If they can send me and Buffy running I think they're more then enough."

Spike nodded, "Well let's have a taste then."

As usual Spike was first to resort to fists and jumped at the one who through Connor in. Eventually everyone threw themselves in. Cordelia and Fred tossed in Swords and stakes but these vampires seemed a little more trained then usual and it took a little longer then usual. Connor's eyes stayed intently on the fight so he didn't notice the stinging fromt he antiseptic for the cuts. Willow and Tara were working quickly to find each gash or wound but there were a lot. Eventually Cordy and Fred moved to check on Connor while keeping an eye on the fight.

Fred looked at Connor, "How's he doing?"

Tara stuttered, "He's um...There's a lot of cuts and bruises but he's... he's going to be fine."

Cordy looked him in the eye, "Good."

Connor avoided her glance knowing she would be another he would have to apologize to, when he was ready. In the fight though the good guys got the upper hand when Groo accidentally tripped a vampire into Gunn's stake. The vampire Gunn was fighting though tripped him and made a gash in his arm that looked pretty bad with a sword that was stolen from Groo. The vamp was about to ram the sword right through Gunn until Groo stole the stake still in Gunn's hand and rammed it through the guys heart. Gunn smiled in appreciation and both men turned to see how well Spike and Angel were doing. Connor watched in amazement at how in sync Spike and Angel were. They weren't related directly or anyhting but it was quite obvious Angel had taught Spike so much about the violence of this world. It only added to the hatred in his heart until he remembered the pain in Buffy's eyes when she begged him to look passed what he knew. He stared at the fight once more and looked passed the violence only to remember they were fighting vampires that had hurt him, that had tried to kill Buffy. He supossed it was a good deed.

Anngel sighed, "Finish this Spike."

"You got it boss."

At that second Spike and Angel threw each of thier vampires that they were fighting back to back into each other and before they had a chance to fall down both Spike and Angel had stakes in thier hearts. Angel smiled, "You remembered?"

Spike shrugged and walked over to Groo and Gunn with Angel, "Damn Charlie boy."

Gunn smiled and accepted Groo's hand up so he was standing. Then when those four fighters turned to stare at Connor he was already standing again and staring at Angel. Angel was expecting some smart comment but what he got surprised him, "You did good." Before he could baske in the fact his son just complimented him Connor kept speaking, "Buffy needs some help. We were at the graveyard doing a little patrolling and all of a sudden these 10 vampires come at us. Buffy get's one easy but the rest were trained I suposse would be the best word. We decided to run because we were both hurt but then she suggested we split up and I come find you guys. Five followed her and only four followed me. She's meeting us at the park in front of her old high school."

Spike sighed, "Why does that woman have to be such a god damn hero? Runs off by herself! Why didn't she just run here with you?"

Connor just realized that buffy tricked him into getting to a safe place and risking herself to do that. Angel noticed and knew instantly what that was like, "Alright so weapons all around."

Spike nodded, "No time to waste boys."

Gunn wiped off the little blood on his arm and picked up a sword, "I'm there."

Groo picked up a stake, "I'll be glad to help."

Angel nodded while grabbing his sword. He looked at Spike and Connor, "You guys don't want anything?"

Spike shrugged, "I'm not really much for weapons. Just throw myself in, that's my motto."

Connor nodded, "I already have my stake."

Angel looked at Cordelia, "Great party Cordy. Thanks."

Cordelia nodded and Willow yelled, "Spike you better be careful. Buffy would die if you accidentally got dusted."

Spike smiled, "I value my life a little more then she values my life. I'll live."

As everyone walked out of the Hyperion Connor stopped Angel in the doorway and looked him in the eyes, "Be safe."

He didn't wait for a respnse before Connor started running towards thier destination. Angel followed soon after wondering what the hell Buffy said to that boy and how her words worked so fast?

**-Park-**

Buffy had managed to kill one of them and just staked her second one on the top of the slide. The other three vamps were trying to climb the slide while she kicked them down but one was climbing the stairs. She threw him down the slide and was playing a good round of defense while waiting for her second wind and chance to make her move. Her body was covered in a lot more cuts and bruises more specifically the gash on her left side of her neck, the sparined or broken wrist and the fact she was limping on her right leg. As she began to develop a strategy one of the vamps snuck up on her from up the slide and when she went to go kick him down the vamp dodged and hopped on the tiny space beside the slayer above the slide; Using the leg she went to kick him off with the vampire threw her off the side of the slide. Wasting no time to let her recover the vamp jumped down landing directly on her stomach. You could hear ribs crack and her breathing stop for a few seconds. The boys showed up just in time to what happened.

Connor, Spike and Angel stopped and screamed at the same time, "Buffy!"


	23. One Slayer down

**_A/N -_** _Okay so why do all my stories involve Buffy getting hurt? I don't know. How are you guys not tired of hearing about Buffy being taken care of by her boys? I'm not tired of it and if you're not then you're bigger fans then me and that's amazing. Thanks reviewers, you are so awesome!Also I know this chapter is kind of short and I apologize but I have plans for the next one._

**-The Park-**

The boys only stopped for a meer two seconds and then continued on with more force worried about thier beloved slayer. Gunn and Groo took on one, Spike took on the one who lent down to bite the slayer as soon as they showed up while Connor and Angel took the vamp who threw her off the slide and jumped on her. The whole time Buffy tried to breath and gain her composure. She tried to stand a few times and failed but she managed to somewhat wit by leaning on her one good arm. She watched as Groo got thrown into a slide, she watched at Spike got thrown into a swing and she watched as Connor and Angel actually worked together and both got thrown into the jungle gym. She half smiled at thier synchronicity but became focussed on her pain in her stomach once more. She tried to scream out to her Angel but it only sounded smokey and clouded.

She finally took a deep and painful breath and cried out to Angel, "Keep that one alive Angel."

He nodded recognizing that this one was the leader. Spike noticed the amount of pain his slayer was in and couldn't take it anymore. He threw his vampire onto a teeter taughter and he happened to land directly beside Buffy. The weakness in the slayers body drove the vamp wild and instead of running back to Spike he lent over the weak slayer and tried to bite her. The second his fangs were about to touch her skin Spike grabbed the stake Buffy had dropped and put it through his back and right on through to his heart. It became apparent that Spike had used her as bait but she couldn't really be mad at him, not right now anyway.

Connor and Angel on the other hand who had realized what he had done were allowed to be mad. Connor yelled at Spike, "Don't you ever endanger her life like that again."

Angel who just finished punching his vampire understood a little more then Connor that buffy didn't care as long as the vamp was dead so he yelled at him too, "Get her to a safe place Spike."

The grandchild nodded and scooped Buffy up like a baby in the least painful way possible and walked her over to a bench. As he lay her down she winced in pain and he sighed at her, "How do you always manage to get yourself into these situations?"

Buffy smiled in the direction of Angel and Connor fighting alongside each other. She did everything she could to speak without pain engulfing her, "Worked out for them though."

Spike looked but then turned his direction towards Buffy. He glanced over her and noticed scrapes and bruises and gashes that could be rapaired but only one injury concerned him the most. He moved to life up her shirt a little bit of the ways and looked over her ribs which were already purple, yellow and blue. He could also guess by the way she was talking the vamp must have done something internal. He tried to smile but Buffy shook her head, "Bad?"

He shrugged, "The bad parts not the injuries, the bad parts the fact it's hospital worthy." Buffy would have killed herself if she had the courage with the mention of a hospital. Spike grabbed her hand and looked at her wrist, "If it makes you feel better, your wrist is only sparined, not really broken."

Buffy half smiled and looked into the fight just in time to see Angel and Gunn switch vampires. Also to notice Gunn get his head smashed into the slide and fall pretty close to where Groo was just getting up. Buffy then looked at Spike, wrapped her arm around her side and slowly lent to sit up but not so much, "Help them."

Spike nodded, "You'll be okay for now, don't die."

Buffy nodded and as Spike took off to take are of the bad Buffy started to try and stand. It took her about five minutes to stand and by then Angel had thrown the vampire towards Connor who decapitated him with surprise. As she stood standing she locked eyes with Angel who just stared at her like he always used to, with worry and compassion written all over him. Connor couldn't comprhend why they wouldn't just walk over to her but he stayed with Angel knowing he would have some reason not to run to her, if what Buffy says about him is true.

Spike finally interrupted them as he had a vampire locked around a little firemans pole, "And why did we want this one alive?"

Buffy took one step as a limp before Angel ran to her and was beside her in less then a second. He picked her up and instantly there was no more pain in her eyes or body. Connor noticed her eyes light up and her body sink into his, she really did love him but Connor just had to find out if he really loves her.Angel was hesitant to put her down but he did let Buffy slowly stand on her own above the vampire that Spike had held against the pole. She spit on him and was about speak but toppled a little. This is when Groo and Gunn made thier way to the group just in time to hear buffy play the leader.

She looked the vampire in the eyes, "What did you guys want?"

The vampire spat back, "A little meal, well a big meal. There's not a vampire alive that doesn't want to see you dead."

Buffy sighed and again tried to be strong while she spoke, "You're wrong there buddy. See the vampire holding you against the pole could snap your neck in two seconds to save me if you don't tell me what I need to know."

The vampire glared at her, "What do you need to know?"

"You tell me."

"We're just a gang of vampires who thought we could have killed a slayer. Would have succeeded too if you hadn't brought your little boys along for the ride."

Connor kicked him in the face as Angel spoke, "If we hadn't you would have been in way more pain then you are now."

Buffy again stared the vamp down, "Now tell me, what is a gang of vamps doing trained and attacking a slayer. Someone had to have put you up to this."

Spike jammed the vamps face into the pole and as he screamed he finally leaked the info, "She said to say welcome back to L.A. 'B' right before I snapped your neck."

Buffy didn't need a name but apparently her pause gave Angel a chance to ask, "Who did?"

The vamp stared at Buffy, "She knows! That's right Buffy, she's ready to make your entire stay here in L.A. as delightful as possible for her."

As confusion sank into everyone Buffy continued her questioning, "Did she expect me to live tonight?"

The vamp shook his head, "Nope, you were supossed to die, you still will die."

Buffy motioned to Spike and instantly he snapped the vamps neck against the pole and stood up. Everyone stared at Buffy just in time for the most important question of all. Angel took the spotlight and asked though, "So, who wants to kill you Buffy?"

Buffy sighed and looked in Connor's eyes. She couldn't lie to him, not after so much progress. Then she turned to look at everyone before saying one name, "Lilah Morgan."

Spike and Connor were the only ones completely confused with who the hell that was. Angel on the other hand skipped who was she and went right to the big question, "How do you know Lilah?"

Buffy shrugged and decided that maybe skimping on a lot fo the truth would be better, "I used to live in L.A. Angel, of course I knocked boots with W&H a few times. I made a few bad choices though and eventually me, Lilah and Lyndsey got pretty close as in my dad was sleeping with lilah and played golf with Lyndsey. They screwed up some stuff in my head and said a lot of stuff I shouldn't have believed but I did. Eventually I started to see the wrong, my mom wanted to move so I chose to go with her."

Buffy brushed off a lot of stuff but she was pretty good at faking stuff. Spike looked his slayer up and down, "Personally I think the slayer here can clarifyy later due to her much needed trip to the hospital."

Now Buffy was left to ponder what was worse, the truth or the hospital? Angel did eventually scoop her up and the group took off towards the hospital. They went by the Hyperion and told Gunn and Groo to tell everyone where they were headed, what had happened and to take the car. Spike drove, Connor was in passenger seat and Buffy lay on Angel's lap in the back half conscious. She smiled up at him, "So, how'd your party go? Did you like the cake?"

Angel half smiled and moved a piece of her hair behind her ear, "It looked real good and everyone told a bunch of stories about me in Sunnydale. Very wierd to listen to."

Buffy smiled, "Don't be modest, you're amazing."

Connor couldn't watch them anymore as he sat extremely confused on what to think. Buffy may have cleared up how he should feel but clearing up his actual feelings is easier said then done. Even hurt she seemed happy in his arms. Spike looked over at the kid through the mirror, "Get used to it kid. For the duration of our stay here this is where the Buffy/Angel love catastrophe starts."

Connor only nodded trying to understood just what that meant. The rest of the ride to the hospital was in silence, even Buffy and Angel only stared into each other's eyes the whole way with the exception of winces and moans of pain from Buffy.

**-Hospital - Hour Later - Waiting Room-**

Buffy had gotten there okay, doctors saw as worse then Spike did and took her in emergency. Spike, Angel and Connor were left to ponder her fate as usual in the waiting room. It had been an hour of silence for all the guys since Buffy was dragged off with the doctors and nurses. They were all about to fall asleep until Angel noticed Buffy's doctor coming towards him. He hoppe dout of his chair causing the other two to do the same. They stood behind Angel as the doctor came closer and closer.

The doc stopped in front of Angel, "You three came in with the girl?"

Angel nodded, "Yeah, is she okay?"

The doctor nodded, "She'll be fine. What happened to her?"

Angel looked around for a good lie but Spike made it up for him, "She got jumped on the way home really badly. She didn't see thier faces."

The doc nodded and Connor looked at him now, "What did you guys do to her?"

The doc took a deep breath, "More then half of her ribs are broken, there was a lot of internal bleeding we had to clear up, She's wearing a tensor on her wrist and another one on her ankle. We also patched up the cuts and gashes; with how much she was hit i'm surprised she didn't bleed to death."

Angel smiled in relief, "She's a fighter."

The doctor smiled, "I can see that."

Spike now looked all happy, "So when can we see her?"

The doctor looked at his watch and then back at Spike, "Well she is pretty much sleeping but you an see her just for a few minutes but then all day tomorrow until visiting hours are over."

Connor wasn't even listening, "So, when can we take her home?"

The urgent sound in his voice scared the doctor so Angel fixed it, "She just really doesn't like hospitals doctor. She'd be more comfortable in her own bed."

The doc nodded and answered, "My guess, day after tomorrow. She should stay of the leg though."

Angel nodded and shook the mans hand, "Thanks doc."

Spike and Connor hugged the guy, "Thanks you." The doctor eventually spoke of how it was no problem and then he went to check other patients. The vampires and Connor were now left to find Buffy's room.


	24. Truth Or A Hospital

**_A/N -_** _I apologize for the lack of character development in this chapter. It's not the best, especially forthe white roomand Lilah. Sorry._

**-Hospital - Buffy's Room-**

The boys walked in on Buffy squirming around the bed while wincing every second yet still trying to get out. Spike broke thier cover and started laughing which lead Angel and Conner to burst out laughing. Buffy lay still as they calmed down and entered the room, "God I hate hospitals."

Spike moved directly to the chair beside the bed to make the Angel boys jealous and smiled at the slayer, "So, you know how long you're in here for this time?" When she shook her head and closed her eyes tight Spike told her, "Day after tomorrow."

Buffy sighed, "God, why do I have to be so god damn careless? I haven't been training or you haven't let me kick your ass in a while."

Spike shook his head, "Oh slayer, you just had a rough night. Everything worked out okay."

"You got to use me as bait, of course you're thrilled."

Spike put on his all famous smirk as Connor finally spoke up, "Which I would have staked you for if I weren't busy."

Buffy finally achknowledged Connor and Angel by the door, "Don't worry kid. What was one of the first things I taught you? When you're fighting nothing but the mission matters. Spike completed his mission."

Angel smiled, "Look everybody, she's a real slayer."

Buffy half smiled back at him and suddenly the whole world dissappeared again. They were torn out of thier own world when SPike cleared his throat, "Not to burst the big romance bubble but personally my curiousity just got the best of me. Who's Lilah and what are we going to do about her?"

Reality was forced upon the slayer once more as she suddenly became all slayer. She looked every one of her guys in the eyes before she explained to all of them, "I'm only going to say this once, I have a history in L.A a very long one which I somewhat got into, I never actually murdered anyone, I was never actually on the payroll at Wolfram and Hart but I did do them a lot of favors, Lilah and me were very close for a while until i made a decision to leave which she didn't like very much and then I ended up leaving with my mom."

Connor walked ot sit on the chair a little closer to the foot of the bed, "What was the decision?"

"To leave."

Angel dredged up the past a little bit, "So, with Faith, you actually knew what..."

Buffy interrupted him with a nod, "...Just because I didn't tell you doesn't mean I don't know what it's like to have no control. So yeah, the Faith thing was a lot more about me then her but what isn't about me in this world anymore?"

She ended that with a smile which she hoped would go all around but didn't. Connor looked at Buffy though kind of confused, "FAith was the other slayer, in jail right now right? The one you said you wish you could have said all that stuff to?"

Spike and Angel looked a little confused now too as Buffy answered a yes. Angel expressed thier confusion, "How does he know that?"

Buffy explained, "When I was dead I got this TV that allowed me and him to watch what was really going on in real life. Connor here saw everyone before he was born but you. He wasn't allowed to see you because then he would remember everything the second he was born which would have somehow been bad. I'm not sure how."

They accepted that and suddenly once more there was nothing left to say until Buffy yawned. Before one of them could tell her to get some rest and sleep she spoke up, "So now that you guys know about Lilah I guess I can tell you that's who Wesley was talking about this afternoon." The supposed to be meeting was coming up though and she just remembered it. She also remembered how worried Willow would be right about now so the slayer/leader part of her kicked in. She strated barking orders before the boys could respond to her statement, "Spike I need you to go to Wesley's and explain to him what happened to me and why I won't be there tonight and then you can do whatever you usually do at night. Angel and Connor I want you to go to the hotel, make sure Willow's okay, let her know everything that happened."

Connor shook his head instantly, "I'm not going to leave you here alone. You're terrified of hospitals."

Buffy smiled, "Please Connor, I'll be fine here. I've had quite a few hospital visits since I was brought back so I'm almost used to them by now." She could still sense his reluctancy to leave so she continued, "I don't like when people worry about me and I know my Willow Connor, she probably bouncing off the walls."

"Why can't Angel just go?"

Buffy sighed, "You remember that night when I told you that I wanted to be alone? That I needed to sort a lot out?" He nodded, "I want to be alone tonight but I want everyone I love taken care of. Please Connor, do that for me."

Connor half smiled, "Okay, but I'm doing it under protest."

"That's all I'm asking."

Spike hopped off of his chair, "Well then slayer, Any specific message?"

"Tell him that I'll call him and what hospital but tell him not to tell Lilah. Also tell him everything that happened tonight."

Spike nodded, "Alright." He bent over to kiss Buffy on top of the head and to give her a small hug which made her wince, "I told you slayer that everything was going to be alright."

She nodded and watched him walk towards the door. Connor walked over tot he other side of the bed and sat down beside her, "You take care of yourself okay? No trying to get up or moving! I'll be here first thing tomorrow." Buffy grabbed his hand but couldn't squeeze that hard. He bent down to kiss her cheek, "I love you."

Buffy smiled, "Ditto." He then walked off towards the door while Angel made his way to her side. He looked down at her and couldn't help but feel so scared that he actually had almost lost her. She winked at him and smiled, "Where's your corny emotional goodbye?"

Angel winked back and lent down to kiss her cheek but really whispered in her ear, "I'll see you later."

Buffy nodded, "Take care of my boys and try not to kill each other while you're at it." Connor half smiled while Angel just nodded and walked back to the door. Spike walked out first followed by Connor and then Angel who smiled at her and then turned out the light. All three super hero men left the broken slayer alone in her own hospital room.

**-Wesley's Apartment-**

Wesley was just about to call Lilah when he heard a car door shut outside. He put the reciever back on the phone and waited for his door to open. Instead he heard a knock which obviously couldn't be Lilah or Buffy. On guard he walked to the door and stood leaning against it, "Who is it?"

Spike smiled, "Open up you ponce. I got a message from Buffy."

Wesley sighed in relief... "One sec." ...and started unlocking his door.

Spike lit a smoke and whispered under his breath, "I went from killing slayers to being thier message boys. What the hell happened to me?"

Wesley opened his door and eyes Spike leaning against the frame, "What's the message?"

"You're not even going to invite a bloke in? I thought us englishmen had manners."

Wesley was irritated by the presense of this vampire already, "I don't fancy on being killed in the future so why don't you just deliver a message and then go do whatever you do."

Spike smiled at his arrogance, "Theres hope for you yet." He basked in Wesley's frustration for a few seconds before speaking again, "The slayer got into a little something tonight and landed her a stay in L.A.'s finest hospital." Shock struck Wesley hard as Spike explained all in the doorway. Once Wesley heard the whole story and was told not to call Lilah he watched Spike drive off in Angel's car which he probably had to steal the keys to drive. Instantly the old watcher planned to make a trip to the hospital tomorrow.

**-Doorway of the Hyperion-**

Angel and Connor had walked in silence all the way back to the hotel after Spike had pit pocketed the keys from Angel's coat. Every so often Angel would glance at his son but knew this would be a bad idea and looked away. Connor too did the same thing towards his father knowing if a conversation did start it could end badly and he promised Buffy he'd give Angel a chance. Then all the sights of Angel taking care of the slayer since she had been there flew into his head and maybe he deserved the benefit of the doubt.

When they reached the door Connor stopped Angel with his hand, "You're really good to Buffy. Thank you."

Angel smiled and saw this as his chance to talk to his kid even if only a sentence, "Yeah well, We have a lot of history."

Connor nodded, "I know. When we first met I'd ask her about you constantly and she would go into all these stories about everything you two did together. You be careful with her Angel or you will pay for breaking her this time."

Angel nodded, "I would never purposely hurt her, and I think on some level Connor, you know that."

Connor sighed and let Angel take the last step before reaching the door and finally said what he'd been meaning to say since Buffy had talked to him, "I can't apologize Angel. On some level I know what I did was wrong but there's still so much hatred left... I don't hate you, I just hate what happened."

Angel was so taken back and was speechless for a good five seconds, "I'm sorry I let you go Connor I didn't want to but..."

"Things happen. You got to move on, not forgive or forget just move on. A very wise woman told me that once. I'm sorry I can't apologize to you yet."

Angel half smiled at the senselessness of that statement but nodded, "I'll take what I can get. I lo..."

Connor wouldn't let him say it, he couldn't hear the love words now, not for a while so he cleared his throat, "We should go in. Buffy wants Willow calmed down."

Angel nodded and opened the door realizing he was moving a little fast there. When thy entered they saw Willow and Tara panicing and mumbling while everyone tried to comfort them. Angel smiled at the memories but then looked at Connor, "You think you could talk to Willow? I need a shower and I'm pretty sure you let the vamp cut me with his stake a few times."

Connor nodded, "Yeah."

"Thanks Connor." Before things got emotional Connor walked off and started talking to everyone while Angel took off upstairs and no one even noticed.

**-Wolfram And Hart - White Room-**

Lilah was pacing in the white room and seemed to be talking to nothing, "The slayers back. I know she obviously didn't die tonight but this could mean so much."

Suddenly a whisper emerged from the silence, "I think for once Lilah you may be right. We want her alive. Bring her in tomorrow night."

Lilah nodded but looked hesitant, "How would you expect to do that?" I mean she's obviously with her Angel."

The voice agreed, "There's always a way, FIND IT!"

**-Hospital - Buffy's Room-**

Buffy had been extremely uncomfortable and knew the second her boys left that she wouldn't be able to sleep. Well she thought this until about ten minutes ago when she felt every bit of pain and worry go away. She didn't know why until she glanced out of her window a few seconds before. She saw a farmiliar shadow and every bit of innocence came rushing back to her from the times in Sunnydale where Angel would watch her sleep from the window just to make sure she didn't wake up with bad dreams. Buffy contemplated enjoying the farmiliarity and comforting silence while finally sleeping but she knew a far better moment could be had if she just noticed him. The slayer had her eyes closed for a good 10 minutes now and she noticed this shadow about to leave when she took a deep breath because it was still hard for her to breath. This shadow turned instantly around to make sure she was okay.

Buffy smiled and whispered knowing this shadow would be able to hear her, "You know, I thought you would have grown out of stalking by now."

Angel knew he wasn't fooling anyone and slowly made his way through the already partly open window from the tree he had been sitting on. When he was fullY in her room he looked over her broken state, "I just wanted to make sure you were going to get your sleep."

Buffy smiled, "Right." When the room went silent Buffy sighed, "You don't have to stand accross the room from me. If I remember correctly you're the one that bites not me."

Angel smiled and instinctively closed the blinds before walking over to the chair and sitting down. She winced when Angel grabbed her hand as he forgot that one of them were badly spranged. He watched his slayer; she could barely move and was obviously in so much pain. Suddenly the reality hit him that he actually almost lost her tonight. Without thinking he whispered, "You scared me tonight."

Buffy nodded, "I kind of scared myself. It's not that I'm scared of dying because well, been there done that but it terrified me that I just got you all back and then I'd never see any of you again."

"This worlds not the same without you Buffy. I think we both know that."

Buffy half smiled and took another deep breath with a wince, "Well let's make sure this never happens again!"

"Gladly."

Buffy saw the joy in her lovers eyes and smiled, "So how was the ride home with Connor?"

Angel sighed, "SPike stole the keys from me, we actually walked home." Before Buffy could defend Spike somehow Angel continued, "My son and I had a civil conversation. He said he wasn't ready to apologize yet and that he didn't hate me."

"I told you all I needed was 24 hours."

Angel wrapped his hands around hers and spoke with that sincere, genuine whisper that would make anyone melt, " Thank you Buffy. You're doing so much for him, for everyone, for me..."

Buffy noticed the serious change in conversation and tried to avoid it, "And I'm the one lying in the hospital bed. You know someone in charge of karma really doesn't like me."

"We did what we could..."

Buffy cut him off before Angel started feeling sorry for himself, "Angel... I'm here, I'm in a lot of pain but I'm here." After she smiled she continued, "Bad things happen to us, price of being a hero remember. I made sure Connor was safe, thats all that mattered, now stop worrying about what you could have done."

Angel suddenly remembered every reason he ever fell in love with this woman. He became the way he always did in Buffy's presence; a thoughtless normal man in love. He wasn't thinking before he spoke or even thinking about anything else. "I miss you Buffy Summers."

The slayer let one tear fall, "I missed you too, I've always missed you."

The room fell to silence and niether wanted to break the moment they were having. That was until Buffy hit reality and remembered one thing, Angel would never let this moment last forever. Angel then proved her suspision by interrupting thier valuable silence with his reality check, "I can't believe this has to end."

Buffy could have looked him in the eye and started the you left me argument again which would have lead to him leaving and them being awkward around them each other the next day so instead she decided to stay silent about her honest response and instead spoke with her eyes closed, "Could you... hold me... please Angel."

Without question Angel took off his coat and shoes. He slowly slid into the spot meant for him, next to his slayer. Buffy winced a few times but in the end she couldn't have felt more comfortable in the arms of her Angel at last. Her head fit perfectly into the crook of his neck, his chin rested comfortably on the slayers head and thier hands never left eachothers. Angel kissed the top of her head right before he thought she had fallen asleep and whispered I love you before he fell into his own dreamland. Buffy slowly opened her eyes to show that she wasn't really sleeping and whispered I love you too back to him. Both lovers fell asleep to those words of sincere devotion and dreamt only of ech other.

**_A/N -_** _I thought with the longest wait ever that you guys deserved some Buffy/Angel fluff stuff. I had previously written it so it was Lilah and W&H outside her window but this romance thing kind of works too, i'm just sorry that it's pretty poorly written and repetitive. I think i might have enough cash soon to start getting net again so these will come way sooner. THANKS GUYS!_


	25. Wesley or No Wesley

**_A/N -_** _So I browsed all the other chapters to see if Buffy actually told Connor about her sending Angel to hell but I couldn't find out if he did or not so for the sake of this chapter and afterwards she did tell him about it! Now I hope you enjoy the drama and don't notice the horrible characterization! Hope ya like!_

**-Hyperion - Sunrise-**

Spike was just sneaking in at sunrise from his late night out until a voice scared him into a fight stance, "Where is it you go at nights SPike?"

Spike looked at the red head sipping a cup of tea and snuggled into a corner on the couch. He smiled and walked towards her, "Everyone needs out once in a while Red."

"So, you're not going to tell me then?"

Spike shook his head and leaned on the couch, "Not a chance." After a brief silence and a small smile from Willow dissappeared he sighed, "So, how come you aren't sleeping upstairs with your girl?"

Willow sipped her tea, "I'm not at home. Plus being Buffy's best friend gives you a reason to stay up all night thinking."

Spike smiled, "I know what you mean luv, but sleeping would also be a good thing in the world of Buffy because there's a few nights you don't get to sleep at all."

Willow nodded, "You get used to it."

Spike nodded and looked around, "You the only one up?"

Willow nodded, "Connor get's up and wanders around every so often, you know where Angel is and I've been here for a few hours."

He saw Willow yawn after that and smiled, "Come on Red, you should get some sleep. Plus your tea is empty."

Willow curled intot he couch and closed her eyes, "Maybe you're right, you're always right."

Only a small smile appeared as she slowly drifted off to sleep, the mug still in her hand. Spike smiled and then made his way into the kitchen for a morning snack. When he got back his mug was half empty and Willow seemed deep in sleep finally. He put his mug down and then removed her mug from her hand and put it on the coffee table. Spike then scooped up the witch like a baby and began to carry her up to her room.

Willow mumbled in her sleep, "You're always taking care of us Sunnydale woman."

Spike smiled, "It's what I do."

Willow whispered a soft thank you and they made thier way upstairs and into Willow and Tara's room. Connor walked out from one of the hallways and watched them walk up the stairs. Spike was still a mystery to him and didn't really know what to think. Buffy had cleared up a little about his father but then came along this other vampire in her life, another vampire with a soul. So far the soul does actually make a difference, especially now that he just saw what he did for Willow but he didn't know if that was just a show or if it was for real. He smiled as he anticipated another soap opera education talk with his Buffy!

**-Hospital - Sometime Later In The Morning-**

Angel had woken hours ago but he wouldn't miss a chance just to lie in a bed and watch his lover sleep so that's what he did. Even as the sun irritated him through the blinds he lay still and watched his slayer as she twitched and dreamt. Her whole life was a mystery to him and she was so fragile as a result of it. He loved moments like these though, where everything seemed simple and not as dramatic as things really were. Her eyes started to twitch and a smile appeared on his face as it always did when Buffy realized he had done the romantic thing and watched her sleep. They said nothing, silence was the best conversation because nothing wrong could be said. They stayed in this silent halt in time until a nurse walked into the room. She stared at Angel knowing visiting hours hadn't begun yet but shook it off at the condition Buffy was in; The nurse even knew she needed someone.

She was about to open the curtains for Buffy when both her and Angel screamed no. The nurse jumped back, "I'm sorry, I just thought you'd enjoy the sunlight."

Buffy calmed down, "Thanks for trying but I like this more."

The nurse understood and walked over to the bed, "Okay whatever you want. My names Jan and you call if you need anything."

Buffy nodded and they said thier thanks before the nurse left as quickly as she had entered. Buffy then looked up at Angel who's face was staring down at hers, "How are you going to get home?"

Angel smiled, "Who says I need to go home so soon?"

Buffy smiled and let out a grateful sigh as she lay back already closing her eyes again, "I miss this."

Angel wrapped one of her hands in his and then started brushing her hair out of her face to behind her ears, "I miss you too."

"You remember how we'd just lay on the floor of the mansion in front of the fireplace. There was no world but ours."

Angel smiled at her groggy state and smiled, "Of course."

Buffy opened her eyes though and with a desperate plea in every word she spoke she looked him in his eyes, "Don't let this moment end."

Angel noticed and couldn't dissappoint her so he kissed the top of her head and let out one of his half smiles, "Never. Now sleep, you could use the rest."

Buffy nodded and curled right back into the arms of her lover. Angel's mind on the other hand was racing for reasons not to just pick this girl up in his arms and take her away from this world.

**-Hospital - Sometime in the Afternoon-**

Buffy had woke up some time ago but again her and Angel just enjoyed each other's comapny. They had small talk conversation full of memories and what had been going on these past few years, well that was until the nurse showed up to drop off Buffy's lunch. When she left Buffy looked over to Angel, "If it hurts to talk how the hell am I supossed to eat?"

Angel smiled, "You need to try Buffy, please."

It was her turn to read the desperate plea in his eyes and of course gave in. Angel slowly got off the bed and sat at the end behind the tray to feed her as she slowly sat up against the pillows. Once Buffy could eat all that her pain tolerance would allow her to she laid back on the bed. Angel moved the tray and was about to walk back and take his rightful place next to her when the door swung open. Connor, Willow, Tara, Cordy, Gunn, and Fred walked in all at once. Connor walked directly in front of Angel and hugged her. She winced at his sudden closeness and he backed away rapidly.

Buffy smiled and grabbed his hand, "No worries Connor, I'm fine."

Connor looked over at Angel who had somehow been pushed back to the door, "I can see that."

Buffy looked back at Angel, "I had good company."

Willow giggled, "We all can see that."

After everyone's smile Buffy looked over at everybody, "Spike crashed out?"

Tara smiled, "He got in late ... or early."

Buffy smiled, "Just like Spike."

An awkward silence spread through the room until Fred spoke up in a very soft voice, "So... what now?"

Buffy and Angel eyed eachother through all thier friends as they realized that whole night was over, reality was back and it was time to move on. Buffy sighed and Angel did the actual moving on, "So, what are we going to do about lilah?"

Buffy seemed to already have an answer, "I need to talk to Wesley."

Angel shook his head, "We can take care of this without getting him involved."

The slayer ignored his suggestion, "We need him, he's our link to her."

Angel looked a little angry now and leaned against the door, "Do you know what he did? How could you..."

Buffy interrupted him instantly, "I need him. With him we can take care of this in less then a day."

Willow intervened so the argument wouldn't progress, "What's your plan?"

Buffy tried to shrug, "I sent Spike to tell Wesley what happened to me so he'll probably be by for a visit later on in the day." She looked Directly at Connor and than her eyes lingered on Angel as she spoke, "Everybody will be civil or you can all leave this to me."

Connor finally spoke up about the issue he and Buffy had yet to talk about, "I don't want him here." His words even shocked Buffy as everyone went silent. He then somewhat explained his statement, "You couldn't possibly understand what it feels like."

Buffy looked him in the eye with actual anger, "You couldn't possibly understand what it feels like to be in his position."

Angel and Willow glanced at each other for a few seconds as they both finally understood why Buffy was so eager to forgive Wesley. Connor on the hand let the fact she had been responsible for sending someone important in her life to hell slip his mind and continued on his stern path, "It doesn't matter what he feels like, he shouldn't be allowed to feel anymore."

Gunn grabbed Fred's hand, "We're just going to get something to eat."

Tara followed them out as Buffy completely ignored them and continued, "Maybe you're right." Buffy escalated her voice and it even sounded painful as her voice got raspy and whispery but yelled through it anyway, "He may have caused a lot of suffering especially to you but things worked out okay. Believe me, nobody could hate him more then he hates himself right now."

Connor was about to retaliate when Willow once again had to stop the argument, "You guys are going to stop right now." She looked directly at Buffy, "You are not in the state right now to have an argument." Buffy nodded and looked away from Connor as Willow looked directly at him and continued, "Like it or not she's got a plan and niether of you have to like it because it's her problem to solve. Now if you aren't going to try to understand where her feelings for Wesley come from then you shouldn't be allowed to be a part of her world right now. So, can you boys handle being here and being a part of the solution or am I going to have to kick you guys out for being a part of the problem?"

Willow squeezed Buffy's hand and she only squeezed back a went to go grab her other one but she moved it and looked directly into his eyes, "Do you even listen when I give you speeches all day? All I've been telling you about is how important moving on is and how important forgiveness is."

"Do you have any idea what it's like growing up in hell? Huh? Any idea at all?"

Buffy shrugged, "I was there for a good hour or two which wa slike half the summer. Now do you have any idea what it's like to be responsible for sending someone you love to hell? When you are or think you are doing the right thing and it ends up ruining somebody you love it hurts more then you're ever going to understand."

Connor was taken back as he finally remembered Buffy's conversation with him about the year Angel went to hell. Connor glanced at Angel and realized another thing that they had in common; the visit to hell. He then glanced back at buffy and calmed a little bit down, "It was different with you. You were trying to save the world..."

"And Wesley was trying to make sure that your dad wouldn't kill you later and he got played by your partner in crime Justine. It always seems different when it's personal."

Angel who had gotten really uncomfortable throughout the whole conversation finally added his two cents, "So, we let him work with us, how's he supossed to help?"

Buffy sighed and looked right at him, "He's my link to lilah. the second I'm well enough to walk I'll set up a meeting and go see her. She won't kill me herself so I'll make her think it's a meeting with Wesley like I tried to do before I got my ribs smashed in. I'll talk to her, we'll work something out and we'll go from there."

Willow smiled down at her best friend, "Take it easy Buffy, it doesn't have to be today."

"Just a little worked up."

Willow looked up towards Angel and then Connor, "I wonder why."

Buffy smiled and looked at Connor. She loved him more then the world but she just couldn't look at him right now. She didn't know if it was because he wouldn't listen or because it sounded as if he hated the person she was with how she was talking about Wesley but either way she wanted him gone. "Do you think you could go get me some water please?"

Connor walked off already guilty. When he was gone Angel's eyes looked over the slayer with sympathy, "You know it's always more painful when it's personal Buffy."

Buffy nodded but didn't forget his unforgiving heart either, "You would know wouldn't you." Before Angel had a chance to defend himself she kept going, "Can you do me a favor?"

Angel shook his head, "You can't just get rid of me with a lame excuse too."

"I was going to ask you to talk to your son. Maybe you can convince him that wishing your once best friend dead isn' the answer anymore. Maybe you'll begin to believe it."

Angel walked over to lean on the edge of the bed close to Buffy, "What makes you think he'll believe me?"

"He'll listen Angel, I promise."

Angel grabbed Buffy's hand and kissed her hand, "We'll see... unless the sun burns me out first."

Buffy realized that, "Oh, be careful."

He nodded and soon walked out the door. Willow glared at Buffy, "If you don't stop talking for a while and work to get better I'm going to put a magical lock on that door so nobidy can come through. You hear me?"

"Yes ma..."

Willow held up her finger to Buffy's mouth, "What did I just say." Buffy smiled and held Willow's hand as she tried to drift off to sleep once more.

**-Waiting Room-**

Angel walked into the waiting room to see Connor sitting on a chair staring at the bottle he had got for Buffy. Angel sat next to Connor and an awkward silence swept over them. Angel even began to twitch and move around in his chair. Connor couldn't take it anymore so he smiled, "Buffy sent you out to talk to me huh?" Angel nodded and Connor shrugged it off, "I don't know why she sent you. You hate him almost as much as I do."

Angel shook his head, "I don't know Connor." That caused his son to dart a deadly gaze right at Angel but he just kept going, "Don't get me wrong, what he did was cause for me to almost kill him while he was in the hospital but I'm glad I didn't. Killing anything with a soul stings Connor, you should know that."

He nodded, "It's just... If he hadn't of been played or kidnapped me things would be so different, I just... he stole my life. At least when Buffy sent you to hell you didn't have a lot to lose because you were already living forever and didn't actually have a life to steal."

Every second word of that sentence felt like a subconscious blow at him but Angel ignored it, "I guess."

Connor finally looked his father in the eyes though for the first time, "Why'd you forgive her?"

Angel took a deep un-needed breath and thought about his answer for a few seconds, "I love that woman more then anything Connor. She's my everything! She's hurt me more then anyone could actually hurt me but I knew she was doing the right thing. The world wouldn't be here right now if she hadn't of done what she did."

Connor half smiled, "You know when we used to talk about you she'd always talk about how you never really liked to talk but when you did it would be worth listening to."

Angel felt suddenly uncomfortable again, "You guys always talk about me?"

Connor was suddenly weak and he couldn't help it as he continued this conversation, "Before I was born she made me curious about everything. If you could talk to someone about what the world is like before you were born would you ask about your parents?"

Angel smiled, "Right."

"Plus she's been on a real speech fest with me lately."

"What's she on about?"

"You mostly. Let's just say if it weren't for her going on with stories and lessons we wouldn't be having this conversation without one fo us throwing a punch."

Angel smiled, "I'm glad she's doing what's she doing though."

Connor nodded and quickly changed the subject before he got more uncomfortable, "You know I really hurt her."

Angel smiled, "The amazing thing about that woman in that room is she understands everything. There's not one thing in the world that she won't understand. Plus she loves you so much, believe me I know. All you got to do is apologize."

"That's not it Angel, I was supossed to be that guy that never hurts her, she just hit a spot and it triggered something."

Angel smiled, "There's no one in the world who knows that feeling more then I do. The last thing any of us want to do is hurt her but we end up doing it either way. Pain is inevitable Connor, but misery is optional."

Connor smiled, "So we're already at the speeches part of our relationship huh?"

Angel nodded, "It's a thing us heroes learn."

"Buffy said I was going to be a hero when I was born, she said that I was going to be a miracle, that I was going to be special and that I was going to be great. I guess I got a lot to learn."

Angel stood up, "You got all the potential in the world Connor and I believe you can be every single one fo those things. Come on you have my DNA and you were taught by a slayer how to fight. What more do you need?"

"The moral stuff she's always on about."

Angel nodded, "Right. I think the only important morals are the world always comes first no matter what, you can't kill innocent people and you have to learn to not hold grudges. Now Buffy's got them all down which takes a strength I can't imagine, I have two of them down and I think I'm learning that last one."

With a smile Connor stood up to, "Personally I don't think I have any of them down but that last one could be a first."

"So, you'll try then? You'll let Wesley be a part of this, and you'll be civil?"

Connor nodded slowly, "If you can do it, I can do it."

"I don't know if I can do it."

Connor smiled, "Well if I can do it you can do it."

Angel nodded, "So uh grab her water and let's go see our slayer."

"We can tell her we made progress."

They both had a small smile as they made thier way back to Buffy's room one step closer to father/son.

**-Wolfram And Hart-**

Gavin stalked into Lilah's office with an angry look on his face, "You weren't even going to let anyone else know the all famous slayer is back in town?"

Lilah smiled at he looked up from her desk, "I took care of it last night."

Gavin put on his sarcastic smile, "Then how come we placed Angel at a hospital last night where a Buffy Summers just happens tp be staying."

"Well did I really expect her to die? I don't think so. I'm just having fun with her."

"It's not just your problem. The senior partners want her in L.A. as long as possible, well until they figure out what they want done with her. And just for the record they are very angry."

Lilah smiled and stood so she could walk around her desk to sit on it right in front of gavin, "So I guess you should probably tell them that I've contacted Lyndsey too, he'd want to know."

Gavin shook his head very rapidly, "That's not possible. If the senior partners can't locate him with our magics..."

Lilah smiled, "They haven't tried the human trail. I don't even actually know where he is but I found someone who does."

Gavin sighed while walking back to the door, no doubt to reveal the new information to the senior partners, "You really don't care what happens to you now? Looks like withdrawl from your extra cirricular activities."

He left without another word and Lilah turned back to sit back on her chair obviously aggitated at the last low remark about her sex-life with Wesley. A smile was put on her face though when she realized that Gavin had just told her that buffy was in a hospital and alive. Despite the Wesley dissappointment she found pleasure in the games that were just about to begin.


End file.
